Thursday, August 25, 2011

“2-Cap” Hits on Courtney

“2-Cap,” known to his bros at Nassau Community College as either “Mike” or “Couchsitting Mike,” blew a year’s pay for that trip to Vegas last Fall.

But for the chance to hit on curvy, perky, five feet of gigglefest Courtney, to buy her 14 dollar oyster shooters in the pool bar, and get a brief boob fondle when she got out of the pool to go pee, before heading back to the room to drop another 29.95 on Spectravision’s feature presentation “This is Not ‘Gandhi:’ XXX,” the 426 hours slinging beers at Yankee Stadium was worth it.

# posted by douchebag1
1:14 pm August, 25 Mick duRocque said...

He had to work a few extra hours to pay for the sweet, sweet chest and groin wax job. It was worth it.

1:18 pm August, 25 tall guy said...

Courtney’s looks like a sweetie. Pity 2-Cap soured her.

1:18 pm August, 25 pyrpylkyrtynz said...

She is cute as a button – but clearly, those boobs are not original equipment.
She has dude butt.
As for him, if he were wearing a visor, backwards AND upside down, around his neck, he would STILL look like less of a deeb.

1:24 pm August, 25 Douchble Helix said...

She’s kinda cute. It might be worth it to this guy.
.
But that *might* be a Mets hat.

1:33 pm August, 25 Vin Douchal said...

Hey dude, that goldfish you won her at the carnival is dead, ya gotta keep the bag full of water

1:38 pm August, 25 troy tempest said...

fake rack. But not a bad rack. It’s a little on the “big” side for her height. She should have gone for the C cups – much perkier.

1:44 pm August, 25 The Yellow Dart said...

Mets hat.

1:45 pm August, 25 Vin Douchal said...

I missed all the fun of the taken down photo. Stoopid customers want me to come see them so they can write me checks and shit

1:49 pm August, 25 troy tempest said...

And 2 Cap is a major douche –
2 caps, tilted? Check.
Dorky tatts? Cheque.
GSR? Czech.

three strikes – he’s a douche.

1:51 pm August, 25 McWhatadouche said...

She’s a bit “trunky” in the waist but definitely wouldn’t kick her out of bed. Then again my dog sleeps on my bed so that might not be saying much.
This guy,…. there’s about 50,000 of him at nassau community.

1:52 pm August, 25 Mandouchian Candidate said...

I think she is hot and I like almost everything about her, except for the now-required 2 hours of sandblasting it will take to get the grease ring from this dude out of her yap. Don’t these chicks realise that you just can’t go dryrubbing any dudes leg that comes around? You gotta protect what’s yours.
+
Idiot Bitches

1:56 pm August, 25 Southern Scrotic said...

Next time he asks you to go to Rehab, just say “No, no, no.”

2:03 pm August, 25 wonderdouche twin said...

2-cap is a little late but he’s rollin down the street….Laid back with my mind on my money and my money in a ziploc! BEEOTCH!

2:48 pm August, 25 Collaz B. Popped said...

2 – Cap style is worse than a popped collar,,,,at least equivalent. I dont see alot of popped collars these days,,,but that Norweigan nut job wore one.

http://bulawayo24.com/index-id-news-sc-international-byo-5983-article-Norwegian+massacre+suspect+may+die+in+prison.html

2:55 pm August, 25 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Her drink is bigger than her leg.
.
Anybody remember this chick? ( Rev.Chad bites clenched fist).
.

3:17 pm August, 25 DoucheyWallnuts said...

@Rev Chad
The voice overdub and echo effect, the 80s answer to AutoTune.
.
Ratts

3:19 pm August, 25 Vin Douchal said...

Is S.E. Cupp the hottest smart chick around?

3:20 pm August, 25 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Courtney is a Cat 3 Cutie – not a full-grown/full-blown bleeth – and 2-Cap is hoping to batten down her hatches by getting her to down some Captain Morgan’s and Cokes and telling her she looks like Reese Witherspoon but with a better rack and prettier face. At least that’s what I’d do.
.
Weathermen

3:22 pm August, 25 DoucheyWallnuts said...

@Vin The 8-Ball says, “It is certain.”
.
Foxes

3:37 pm August, 25 Stephanie said...

He’s not really too obnoxious as most of these turds on here,except that he tattooed “Stain” on his chest name area.
Logically, so he could remember that on his next job application.

3:52 pm August, 25 schlicht bindenburger said...

what are those protuberances under her funbags?

3:53 pm August, 25 Douchble Helix said...

I won’t speak for everyone, but, no, Rev., I do not remember her. Because I never heard of her. There’s a whole lot more out there than The Great White North.
.
Nanooks.

4:04 pm August, 25 schlicht bindenburger said...

@ dooshelix…ya, but its all craaaaaaaap!

4:05 pm August, 25 schlicht bindenburger said...

……YOU CUNTS!

4:22 pm August, 25 Anonymous said...

She has nice ribs. Who wears two hats? I’m putting in my two week notice for bag hunting. My edge is gone.

4:24 pm August, 25 Vin Douchal said...

RE: Great White North
.
Canada is a great neighbor. Besides the tremendous female talent pool they have sent to Hollywood, these guys invented hockey. HOCKEY, I SAY! Fuck off, lifetime pass for Canada, America’s hat
.
.
.
Emmanuelle Damn Chriqui

5:33 pm August, 25 Charles Nelson Douchely said...

@Rev. Chad

Ah the memories. Lee Aaron.

The first woman I ever really enjoyed.

And by really enjoyed, I mean wanked to. Although in my case, it was Metal Queen.

5:35 pm August, 25 Douchie Arnaz said...

Butt or no butt, that girl’s smile is like a ray of sunshine — in this case it’s shining on the human garbage dump that is Rehab. Good times!

6:01 pm August, 25 Steve said...

Ugh. That looks like my cousin. If that is him then this pic doesn’t surprise me at all.

6:30 pm August, 25 DoucheyWallnuts said...

RE: Great White North
.
Canada is like America’s hat.

6:43 pm August, 25 ShameSpear said...

Ah yes, he obviously got used to wearing two hats like that in prison. It fooled the less intelligent inmates, making them think he saw them coming in the showers.

7:57 pm August, 25 DarkSock said...

Can you imagine how insufferable these Rehab pool rats are going to be in 2050, sagging around the actual rehab pool during post-stroke motion classes? Their desiccated tits floating around them in the old-piss spiked water like Cthulhu’s bloated corpse…

8:13 pm August, 25 Steve L. said...

$14 + $29.95?!
.
there goes 2-Cap’s retirement plan.

9:14 pm August, 25 troy tempest said...

2 Cap was what Willis was talkin’ about.

6:25 am August, 26 Douche Wayne said...

His maxi pad is showing.

10:14 am August, 26 diedouche said...

kill yourself

2:55 pm August, 27 my friends call me @$$hole said...

without the two hats, i’d give him a notta’, even with the tats, i mean, fuckin’ everyone has them, they’re not auto, even his big silly sleeves… no bling, no stupid facial hair, no stupid look on his face, no stupid hand gestures, no headlock or pointing to the obvious tittles, just the two hats… i think you posted this just ’cause you think she’s totally freakin’ hot, and that’s just fine with me, ’cause she’s totally freakin’ hot… i can’t bring myself to kick this guy very hard though, he’s barely stage-1 everybag…

3:32 pm August, 27 Whoop-di-douche said...

Two-cap’s an original.

4:28 pm August, 27 Douchie Arnaz said...

Yep. I say hand him the Mayor of Schmuckton award, along with a nottadouche. He just seems like a big, aw-shucks, not-too-bright, greasybear who’s almost embare-assed to be seen with Jesus-Christ-that-girl’s-cute-as-a-bug. Go in peace.

10:15 pm January, 12 3marbles said...

1parochial

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