Holiday
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Monday, March 25, 2013
- @ 3:38 PM
- Categories: Holiday
- 18 comments
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- @ 7:00 AM
- Categories: Holiday
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- @ 6:50 AM
- Categories: Holiday, nottadouche
- 24 comments
- @ 6:10 AM
- Categories: Holiday
- 31 comments
Happy Passover!!
HC1 and I will be celebrating our ancestral tradition by asking the four questions. I might even sing her a song.
To my fellow Hebraics, enjoy your seder, and may all your jelly rings be chocolate. To the Christians among us who ask “what is Passover?” it’s like Easter. Only with less Jesus and more guilt.
Loading ...Oogieloves New Years!!
Everyone dance along with Cary Elwes as his career hits its absolute nadir!!
Merry New Years!!
Loading ...Merry Christmas!
I may not be a Christian, but some of my best friends and at least 40% of my ex-girlfriends are. So let me wish all of you who celebrate Christmas a very Merry Christmas!
May your stockings be full of pear, and may douchebags be roasting on an open fire.
I will be enjoying a tasty meal of Chinese food and dip dangerously into my stash of tasty Hostess HoHos.
Loading ...Happy Turkey!
May all your cobblers be juicy! And your stuffing devoid of STDs.
And by STDs, I mean special tasty desserts…
Loading ...Atoning for Alpacas
Your humb narras will be spending the day atoning for a whole host of personal deconstructions, not the least of which involves my unhealthy obsession with sexy, sexy alpacas.
I imagine them in the sweetest of knee socks and skirts.
Making sexy falsetto mews and brays.
And I am shamed in the eyes of Adonai.
An even greater sin because the great Hebraic prophet, Moab, explicitly condemns alpaca fetishization in “Psalm Like it Hot.”
And then there’s my unhealthy obsession with treyf Pear. Perhaps more understandable, since Maimonides himself was a huge Pear fanatic.
But still.
All will resume tomorrow.
Shofar so good.
I blame that last pun on your moms.
Loading ...Happy Labor Day!
Vacationing King Douchuous the IV and Hottie Whose Name He Forgot After The Last Round of Mai Tais want to wish you all a happy Labor Day.
The King, and all his douchebag ilk, never worked a day in their lives. Too much time and money for the children of privilege define the douchebag class. Which reminds me that Labor Day is also an important function in fighting the douchebag plague. Entitled inheritors with attitude, who have no clue of the battles that came before.
Let us all take a moment and honor the working class, and all they represent to this world. For the workers of the world, who deserve respect and not the contempt that some of our leaders spit out, I offer a symbol of my gratitude:
No labor needed.
Loading ...Crazy-Eyez Carlos and Hott Brazilian Gisella Say Happy July 4th!
What’s good for Carlos is good for America (by way of Mexico)!
Happy July 4th y’all!! (as I affect my southern accent for effect, thus demonstrating a clear knowledge of the difference between “affect” and “effect,” which then, ironically, proves that I”m not southern.)
Thanks for hangin’ with all them site buggin’ going on these days. Close to being fixed with the cleanup, things should be working a lot better.
Also, my personal blog, Lucky Punkass, will be starting up soon, giving me a chance to rant away at the larger cosmos while still continuing the hottie/douchey mock. Hope you’ll check that out as well.
For now, we grill.
Loading ...Happy Memorial Day!
From all of us here at HCwDB. And by all of us, I mean those who like to mock shifty-eyed platinum choadwinks, and are willing to buy their hot chick a drink provided it’s under ten dollars.
May you pensively reflect on those who have gone before us to form this great Nation on this Memorial Day. Or around the world. Unless you live in one of the countries we invaded for no reason. In which case, I apologize that half this country are a bunch of half-baked maroons.
And may you find Spiritual Pear awaiting you as a reward from the Buddha God Head for such spiritual work.
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