HCwDB of the Year: The Joey Porsche Experience
It wasn’t even close.
The mighty Fish Slap and the powerful Donkey Douche have fallen.
And while this award is supposed to summon the Zen totality of both the hottie and the ‘bag in communion, the power of the Joey Porsche Experience was enough of a singularity to carry him all the way to Supernova.
However, J.P. does appear to have a regular hott, she is the blonde minx who makes periodic appearances with him. And so I have included her in the award winning pic.
A well deserved and final 2007 Douchie Award for HCwDB of the Year goes to… The Joey Porsche Experience.
And while there were many great hottie/douche combos this year, JPE proves himself transcendent.
And by transcendent, I mean really freakin’ douchey.
To recap the entire list, your 2007 Douchie Award Winners are:
Hottest Hott of the Year: Pajama Choad’s Hott
Smells Like Poo: Tatman Begins
Best Golden Globes: Boobies Spake Zarathustra
Most Annoying New Douche Move: Pointing. At. His. Abs.
Douchiest Joey Porsche Wannabe: Johnny Blaze
Most Trashcan to the Head Worthy: The Bells
Most Expensive First Date Hott: Strawberry Cheesecake
Douchiest Twins: Stereodouchetonic Twins
Douchiest Band of the Year: Buckcherry
Douchiest Group Scrote: The Douche Platoon
Spikiest Hair: Douchsplosion
Best DB1’s Future Ex-Wife Hott: Purg Hottie
Douchiest Everybag: Ricky
Most Polluted HCwDB Couple: The Chestnut Trees
The Irving Thallbag Lifetime Achievement Award: The Gator
Douchiest Popped Collar: Pinky
Douchiest Celebrity Couple: Jessica Alba and Cash Warren
Greatest Crisis of Modernity: The Long Journey
Orangest Orange: The Prompas
Sexiest Librarian Glasses: Scrotey Opie’s Hott
Hottest Girl-Next-Door Hott: Clay Wankin’s Hott
Hottest Innocent Getting Greasetackled: Chandlerbag and the Bumper
Most Annoying ‘Bagling: White By Unpopular Happenstance
Douchiest Superhero: The Batbag
In Memoriam: Pumpy
Great work to all who participated in the brilliant comments threads, votes, opinions and a special shout-out to the regulars, both commentators and ‘bag hunters, who keep the site filled with hottie/douchey energy on a daily basis.
It’s Friday, The Douchies are over, and your humble narrator on all things ArmaniExchange/Cleavite, The DB1 is in New York preparing to get wrecked and save a hottie or three. So I tip my cup of Night Train and congratulate all of our 2007 Douchie Winners. It’s time to start drinkin’.
1stipulate