Monday, April 26, 2010
The Minibra
Carrying on in the tradition of HCwDB legend and joyous consumer of tasty cola products, the immortal Bra!!, The Minibra brings arm tatts, ginormous watch, and happy demeanor to his mugging of Bleethy ‘Baguette, Rachel.
The Minibra is a minimal but solid stage-1 bottom rung douche. The arm tatt itself would be enough to qualify. But it’s the hand gesture + watch-strap that take him over the edge from pud to ‘bag.
Sadly, Rachel is a swirl of Sorority Mess herself, sadly lost to the ways of choad.
Which would all be understandable if this wasn’t taking place in a 14th Century Conquistador torture chamber meant for Mayan heretics.
The Bra! Boy.
.
The Bra!ffspring.
The Bra!scendant.
.
Not to be confused with The Bra!scedants which were a kick-ass punk band.
The Bra!geny.
Spawn of Bra!heimian Rhapsody.
Bra!’s Elder Child Cockk.
The Bra!ncestor.
The Bra!eir Apparent.
Instead of tasty cola beverages, Mini Bra! drinks Bra!ndo… the thirst mutilator.
All out ‘bag…and she is well on her way to being infected…
I’m not going to be so callous as to say that Rachel actually looks like a frilled lizard, but I can’t say she doesn’t either.
Rachel flashes the secret sign to show how she likes to be triple-teamed by the boys in Alpha Chi: one in the pink, one in the stink, and finally, one in her superfluous second anus.
Hints to bags: If a tattoo artist says he/she is really into calligraphy right now, that does not mean you should let that person practice along the entire length of your arm.
Alternatively, those arm tatts are actually depth markings, which come in very handy at the frat fisting parties.
Ah, yes. The ol’ “Giant cursive letters running vertically and crossing a joint, which looks like ass and wastes valuable tattoo real estate.” Buckwheats for you, too, Mini-Bra.
@ Mr. White–
I like this. Say we redecorate your office like this? I wanna play Spanish Inquisition.
I like her bra!celets. I don’t like to bra!g, but she better bra!ce herself when I grab hold of her bra!ids, bra!ndish my bra!twurst and bra!zil nuts and bra!ise her bra!ins out with much bra!vado.
Bramingo Placido.
Bratman and Ruebenstein.
Bratworst.
Sorry, I’ve been eating too much bra!n.
@medusa
Only if you’re the conquistador.
Quantum Mechanics Bra
That is one big-ass, ginormous goddamn Six Pound Watch!
I am not sure what to say about this one. The chick is not so hot and already a Bleethe. This guy is another Wanna-B-Bag. Did he take a pen and write on his arm? Another guy trying to be cool but he’s only looking like a tool. Try again chode breathe!
Meanwhile, in the rear, Buffalo Beast narrowly averts recognition and sulks back into sweat sweat anonymity.
His tats are wack, his bling is shitty
His bitch be on the itty bitty titty committee
His giant watch equals scrotal fad
Can poo impregnante slut with only one nad?
Brah?
Her name is Ann.
.
Brah-Brah-Ann.
Todd took sadistic pleasure in revealing Ann’s involuntary nipple-vomit reflex in public places.
Being relatively late to the party here, I hope this isn’t unwelcome old hat:
If Classic Fairy Tales Took Place in Jersey
Both of those pictured above deserve Rapunzel’s roundhouse.
I got to Rapunzel’s roundhouse first, bra-ha-ha!
He’s just got one thumb on Rachel’s mini-tit, so obviously he’s a Pumpy wannabe.
Personally, I suspect he’s Boston Bra-min.
@ Whoop-di-douche, 7:19:
I propose a term for such undeserving puny Pumpy wannebes
Pumpaloompas
toss these back… they’re brah-mature & she only needs a mini-brah
Changing my “Gravatar” in an effort for all to see wouldn’t do it justice.
Orange.
Douchie.
Despicable
Douchaloompas
Interesting choice of interior design…
how does it feel to be Dr. Bra!!’s mini-me, Minibra?
but don’t worry. just because you don’t get as many hotts as Bra!! doesn’t mean you’re not as douchey as him.
No tasty cola beverage, lil bra? Bra and his broheims disapprove. Now fetch me the ’61 Latour and don’t forget to decant.
Moments later the two unruly Americans were told that Auschwitz was not in fact a brewery tour and were then escorted out of the memorial for unbecoming behaviour.
Rachel’s nipples were like grapes; every time MiniBrah squeezed them she let out a little whine.
.
.
Sorry
^ Nice
–
–
The Ugly Americans wondered why the pizza ovens were so damn big.
BTW DarkSock, what the hell are you up so early/late?
Time to re-fill the ambien scrip.
Mayans who are heretical for their love of radiant heat over Quetzalcoatl.
My God, it’s “Idiocracy” come to life!
Just seconds after the steel door closed with an audible boom, Rachel wiped the sweat from her forehead and whined, “Is it getting hot in here? It’s so hot! I need another drink my god is it hot to you? It’s really hot I’m getting all icky sweaty. It is so f*cking hot.” At which point Minibra peeled off his shirt, slung his jeans low, and began flexing along with all the other douchebags.
Word, Scrotum Pole. Word. That’s what happens when you take one, it kicks in, you get loopy and take another. Ya run out. The pharmacy should toss in another dozen for contigency…tight ass pill counters; all high and mighty on your little raised platforms…
My brain wriggles at night like a prison rape victim; random crazy shit…gotta toss it a bone or it will keep me up all night having tourrettes contests between hemispheres.
They will be wed.
Moments later the two unruly Americans were told that Auschwitz was not in fact a brewery tour and were then escorted out of the memorial for unbecoming behaviour.