Thursday, June 9, 2011
‘Ey! Whossgot da Benjamins?!
Morty got da Benjamins!!
Hot Chicks With Douche Bags
PICTURES OF HOT CHICKS WITH TOTAL AND COMPLETE DOUCHEBAGS. WITH COMMENTARY.
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Hall of Mock
- Pfah
- DarkSock
- Baron Von Goolo
- Troy Tempest
- Steve L
- Wheezer
- Medusa Oblongata
- creature
- Crucial Head
- Mr. White
- Archidoucheis
- Mr. Biggs
- Vin Douchal
- Sergeant Scrote Stain
- boatbutter
- Captain Bringdown
- Whoop-di-douche
- Jacques Doucheteau
- massengill
- Dr. Bunsen Honeydouche
- Mr. Scrotato Head
- Deltus
- The Reverend Chad Kroeger
- mr.reeve
- Wedgie
- Et Tu Douche?
- Eliza Douchcoo
- dbBen
- soy bomb
- DoucheyWallnuts
- I R A Darth Aggie
- jonezy
- Hermit
- Chris in ‘Baghdad
- Douchble Helix
- the douche is alright
- Choad the Douche Sprocket
- Stephanie
- The Dude
- Dude McCrudeshoes
- Sir David Douchenborough
- Il Douché
- Bag A
- douche equis
- Capt. James T. Douche
- Charles Nelson Douchely
- THEONETRUEDOUCHE
- Merle Baggard
- ehcuodouche
- Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt
- Charles Douchewin
- FredN.
- Ol' Dirty Douchebag
- In memoriam: bcs
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Looks more like he’s got the “Georges”
Morty has all that bling and damn near thirty six dollars in ones, so you’d think he should be happy, but he always seems a bit melancholy.
Maybe it’s because he suspects some low-hanging grapes on that stripper.
Pac Man’s cheapskate albino uncle is making it rain.
Singles.
Geez, thanks Morty! Now she can go to Subway for a nice turkey sandwich. With chips and a drink, too.
Heath Ledger needs some tits! Why so serious?
*
*
too soon?
With this much money, you can get 2 funnell cakes, a deep fried twinkie, and an 8 ball… Run along you little scamp.
I could see being King Douchious IV for a weekend. Not so much being Morty for 5 minutes.
Newspaper delivery rakes in the tips at Christmas time!
It’s likely she’s a stripper, and that’s Morty’s bankroll, and they took a picture. Must be a nice place.
^What makes you think she’s a stripper?
is it just me, or does that stripper’s nose stick out farther than her tits?
^ what makes you think she’s a she, Wedgie?
“She” may be less than beautiful, and of questionable gender, but the bitch’s knuckles prove she’s a brawler, and for that, I respect her.
Thirty seconds after this pic was taken, she cold-cocked Morty took his money, credit cards and bling, and left him lying prostrate and broken on the dirty strip-club floor.
Reminds me of West Virginia and that dude who the $300+ Powerball several years ago. He was yokel from WV and he would start showing up at local strip clubs in WV with suitcases filled with cash to ply the ladies with. They eventually figured him out and there were several instances were the girls set him up out in the parking lot and he wound up getting robbed by the strippers & their BF’s. True story.
Ugh, Morty and his continual reappearances! Spare me.
Morty is a Whoredog Thousandaire and always get his stage fee paid in ones. No doubt an open strip bar.
@ Et Tu
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The West Virginia lottery is responsible for more untimely death and misery than Newt Gingrich and the United Kennel Club combined.
.
Under the pretense of compassion, The Machine re-enslaves the once-liberated, then condemns them to trailer parks and government housing. Detained like pet store parakeets, too afraid to fly through open cage doors. The cruel masters break the collar bones of the ones foolish enough to seek exemption, and withhold sustenance and lottery tickets from those who refuse to pay homage to the wicked entity.
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The West Virginia floodwaters well up from floor drains and sewer grates giving sorrowful proof through the night that the insidious flow of cholera is still coursing through streams and tributaries, the epidemic increasing in the diminishing daylight. Slack-jawed dependents, with disfigured faces pressed against the dirty window glass, stinking of incest and hereditary illness’ are forced kneel to the merciless and uncaring deity. Ten cent trinkets are laid down before it’s floor-mounted boilers in a vain attempt at appeasement. The Machine grinds the offerings into the blood-soaked ground like so many ticket stubs and soiled condoms at a miserable, torturous Rush concert.
.
Then, there are the days when it all becomes crystalline, the fog lifts and The Machine leaves a discernable vapor trail of uric acid and toxic mist, eviscerated bodies spit broken teeth through bloodied lips, blocking the footpaths of State Parks and opening the welcoming gates of psychiatric institutions and wholesale liquor outlets, eschewing all other forms of recreation. Swift Death Angels provide no promises, but vaguely hint at potential redemption.
Morty developed adult onset Blingabeetus after his 52,000th rusty nail.
^No condoms at RUSH concerts Sir. And please show them their due using the capital form of the word like this “RUSH”.
@Hermit
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at last, i’ve figured it out….Rev Chad is Pfah in a mental ward!
& Morty is the Bosses gin soaked uncle
It’s funnier if you pretend his left arm is her right arm.
Was it, “Guess the Cock Size on the Tranny Night,” at Morty’s local Bingo parlor, and Morty won?
Dolla’ dolla’ bills, yo. Who got da hookup bra? Unlce Morty and his Washingtons. We’ze talkin’ dead presidents.
Is there an upper age limit for Weekly winners? Morty may be setting the curve.
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Come on, Morty – though it’s clear you got your tatts way back in the halcyon days of 1973 while shitfaced on Blatz beer, it’s juuuuust a little late in life to be taking on all of the attributes of the modern douchescrote.
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Go back to dreaming of your sleeveless denim jacket with the Old Style and Roadrunner patches while you dominate the pool table at the rest home. It’s cool, ya dig?
Every time we see this cretin, he gets worse and worse. By “worse and worse” of course, I mean “better and better” to mock. Everyone should be ashamed that Morty exists.
@Hermit
You had me at “Newt Gingrich and the United Kennel Club combined.”
.
I’ll read the rest later after I’ve settled in, Fucking unseasonably hot weather sucks Alpaca balls!!!!
Morty is how I picture RevChad in a few years. No offense Rev.
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That dude on the right looks Ford tough. Damn.
Bling, bling! Pinky ring. Morty’s rockin’ the tin.
“It’s just that we lost a lot of good men out there…” he says through teary eyes.
At least he has Herschel the Stripper to help him forget the horror.
Morty is suckin’ up to somethin’: Why else would he hide his mouth behind a fan of one-dollar bills?
@Hermit
Dude, you should create a blog. I for one would subscribe, your words like prescient art from the past such as Picasso’s “Guernica” and Munch’s “The Scream” ring true to this very day.
@Hermit, you totally should get a blog, But you’re gonna need some pictures of boobs to get me to visit it every day. And I need full comment privledges, i.e. I get to post pictures of dongs and You Tube videos of my fav bands. Also, I get to answer people’s stupid questions in my own corner of the blog. Deal?
Here is Morty’s adopted son:
http://is.gd/g13yYy
@Hermit, also if this blog of your’s could have a built in spellchecker, that would be sweet. And I want to vote on stuff. But don’t start that and then take it away, because that’s when your readership really spazzes out. You should also have a word of the day. People like that crap. Cool, let me know when its up and runnin’. Then I’ll tell those twats at 4chan about it, I’ll post that you are speaking ill of the great Zyzz and then see if your skilled enough to handle a virtual gang bang on your site. If your neckbeard is as awesome as the one in your pic, I’m sure you’ll handle it just fine.
I thought Morty died of a chest grabber already.
Well, at least we know where Newt’s campaign mangager spends his evenings.
she cold-cocked Morty took his funds, credit cards and bling, and left him lying prostrate and broken on the dirty strip-club floor.
Morty has 37 bucks…
Morty *had* 37 bucks…
Tranny keeps going back to the old well…and one dollar at a time s/he will someday upgrade the goods to a ‘B’ cup.
I wish Morty were my dad. He rocks.
Sadly for Morty, Blondie Bee isn’t going to go home with him for $36 in ones. She will, at most, drink a couple of $10 drinks on his tab, and then go home with the strip club’s bouncer.
Hermit needs a blog. Or my email address, so he can just send me his rantings.
So I blew it up in photoshop ran a few filters and I think they have all of $57 between them.
BIG MONEY BIG MONEY BIG MONEY!!!!!
I bet morty is 24 years old… but with all the meth, booze, smokes, weed, paint sniffing, glue sniffing, time in jail, panhandling… he looks like that
Morty curses Ben Bernanke and his quantitative easing. Back in the day he could afford a real female at the strip club – now even he’s not sure.