Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Muttonchop Max asks Megan if she Likes To, Like, Listen to Snow Patrol, and if, maybe later, she’d wanna go smoke up together
Megan said no.
Megan said no.
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Son, I knew Major General Carter Littlepage Stevenson. You are no Major General Carter Littlepage Stevenson.
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Megan, I’ll listen to the gutless stylings of Snow Patrol and Coldplay if you let me fondle your glasses.
Apparently I also don’t know how to properly close an html link.
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Confederates.
That’s not Kettlehead sparkin’ up solid in the foreground, is it?
Her glasses are as big as that clear jelly butt plug she’s holding. She looks somewhat anime. Which works fine for me.
Perverts.
Ali G tough-guying it trying to kick your ass with his eyes. But his semetic little beauty with the perfect pooch can only think about his ugly uncircumcised mirqaz
I believe the term you Americans use for listening to Snow Patrol and sparking up a jay is called “casual sex” or “partying” to the layman. I do so enjoy your American ways. If only someone would “party” with me. Brazilian Emo Hulk, lonely.
@sock
Holy shit, she’s Yomiko from “Read or DIe.” Now I want her even more.*,**
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*I’m sure that link will fucced up. I’ll fix it in the next post.
**Yes, I watched an anime once, at 2 a.m. while high. It worked on multiple levels, and by “multiple levels,” I mean “lesbian ninja schoolgirls.”
Alan Ezekiel Lipshits, you should be ashamed of yourself! Go and wash off those disgusting tattoos, mister. What is that!? A rosary tattoo?! You always fantasized that you were some special goyim. Oy vey. Well, you are no Tanner Wyatt Dylan the third, you ungrateful little bacon eating izmel. You were born with a jew fro, and you will die with a jew fro. Only you can’t be buried next to grandpa Hezekiah with TATTOOS!
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And Shoshana Bahr-Levine, you are such a bad influence on my little Alan, you Jezebel harlot. I am calling your mother.
Hipsters, or in this case, pseudo-hipsters, always look so out of place at the beach. It’s hard to be ironic in the sunshine.
It took me a while but I translated his “chest” tatt from farsi into English and it says the following: “I love to slap my micro-cocck with monkey chops until the discharge from my brown eye runs clear.” I’m a little rusty though so it might not be totally correct.
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fornicators
So what’s the penalty for returninga book late to her library?
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And let this listing now begin.
@DarkSock, thank you for the hot doll on doll action pic. I thought I was the only one who was into this. Please tell me you’re a Shortie too.
And @DudeMcCrude FTJMW (For the Jew Mom Win)
@Doc B 2:53p, I guess noones really feeling that meme. Sorry, happens to the best of us. Next time start one with “Her tits are so big…” no matter what it will catch on like hotcakes in a wildfire.
Though Farsi and Arabic scripts are very similar, by the looks of it, his tat is Arabic. It literally translates to “success.” Which adds a big stinkin’ waft of irony to this putrid mess.
@Douche of York, Anonymous Tipster, Heig Sheibe, Brazilian Emo Hulk:
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Nancy Dreuche, we know it’s you. Easy on the Jews. That is an ARab wannabee.
A jew with a rosary tatt next to some arab script tatt. It all makes sense now.
Her glasses are so huge they look like the ones the adult film actresses wear as jizz-proof safety glasses.
@ Douche of York ^
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Are you positive? On my second pass at translating it I think it looks more like “falafel fluffer”. Maybe it is some kind of “gangsta” slang for what he’s willing to do in prison?
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Money shot victims.
arabic tit tat. contender for a douchie? i hope so
Her glasses are so librarian the Higgs Boson element passes thru it on a regular basis. And by regular I mean huge.
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glasses.
Lois Lane called, doesn’t need her really huge glasses back. Megan can keep them, and by that I mean huge.
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Big glasses. Really.
@Rev, you give me waaay too much credit. My comedic stylings and mocks pale in comparison to some of the peeps you think I am. Nice work though. You’re smarter than I hoped you were.
And again, for the record, I loves me some jewish folk.
I think while the glasses get the attention, it’s the goolie shorts that seal the deal…and by “seal the deal” I mean “cause ejaculation.”
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Meanwhile, I think Max is channeling a cross between Wolverine and the Mod Elvis, who the preceded the Fat Elvis, who preceded the Dead Elvis.
Swifty Lazar called; he wants his glasses back…preferably splooge free.
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http://www.flickr.com/photos/poorusher/3053358392/
There aren’t any ethnic strains of the human species that don’t have douchebags or otherwise annoying members.
For every Woody Allen, there’s a Dane Cook™.
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Something like that. I’ll go ahead and shut up now.
Well, at least Megan made a good decision this time around.
I ment ethnic STAINS ^^
Megan is bookish.
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She wrote the book on it.
Megan isn’t a Hipster Librarian.
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Taintster™.
I’ll return a meat book to her Dewey Decima™. Late™.
There once was a tainty called Megan
Had DB1 fully beggin’
For a life spent between
The sheets with her e’en
Though she won’t pull off her leggings.
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Sorry™.
And MuttonChop, this dude is coming to rip off your unauthorized sideburns™.
Muttonchop is not a Jew. If he is, Mrs. Kroeger will find him and Krav Maga his ghetto.
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Blockheads
The other dude is smoking his doob backwards.
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Darlins
DB1, could you do a nightly news broadcast too? Then, I could throw my tv away, and by that I mean use it to watch my stash of porn dvd’s
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Filthy whoers
Megan is no librarian Hott. The one time she was asked to go to the library she replied, “Mum said it’s not supposed to go in there.”
Reminds me of cleaning the cat box,I scooped up this stuff and dropped it into a double bag from Walmart.
hes going to an early showing of that darnabbit ape movie
Hey Max, Dick Butkus called. You’ve ruined his name.
Unlike you, he’s earning back his reputation the hard way.
Guid IS good @7.38
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Mom said so.
8.03, moron.
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Time warp
In other news, DB1 will soon begin his nightly news broadscrote.
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Choadcast.
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With Baller Scronkite, Scarbra Ballters and Tom Bra!!kaw.
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And that heinous bitch from HLN.
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no, the other one.
DB1, BarBra!! Walters called, recommended you keep a neutered position on your newscast.
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Bare and Phalanxed.
BarBra!! also thinks that the gal on HLN who looks like a cross between her and Bette Midler should lead your team.
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Call her Better Midler, she’ll do fine
Film at 11.
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Try to be asleep by then, it’s awful.
Megan has the world’s most subtle duck lips ever.
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The Laker hat is a possible recovery for the twit in the backwards Laker hat.
I think I just spoke in Fartsi.
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Not sure.
Can we make marijuana use auto-douche? Because it’s every bit as conformist and unimaginative and herd as the mindless tattoos and fake tough-guy posturing seen in the photos posted on this site.
Tony, you need to spark a doob and chillax, brah.
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You cannot frolic whilst stoned. Medical FACT.
Hurl Scheibe is not Nancy Drouche. Just a long time “anonymous” lurker with a new name.
But can you prance whilst stoned?
I have danced a bizarre jig while accidentally smoking a J. Does that count?
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I thought it was a clove?
@Hurl, when I’m high as a kite I like to prance around like Richaed fucking Simmons. But that’s just me. That’s just what I like.
soon enough,muttonchop will realize that megan’s affections for him will only last until she smells the weed, if its good she will be all over spliff richards there, until he
passes it, then she is gone.
Smoke enough of that great weed, honey, and I’ll be on top of Max’s head for the balance of the the night.
Next morning, you’ll have to steal Max’s sweatpants in order to do the walk of shame back to that candy apple Mustang Daddy bought you.
‘cuz you and I know you roll like that…
Lemme think…last time I saw a muttonchops here on HCwDB was “Old Chap” and his striped banana sling…far more memorable than this dude, but at least Max wears a fave color cap and his hottie is suspiciously Librarian Hott.
So we can be assured DB1 is happy about it, even if we’re not.