Monday, January 9, 2012

HCwDB of the Week: Tony the Curdle and Butt Pooch Adriana

From last Tuesday, this pile of rampant rhesus poo fling is all that is Olsen on a Monday.

Or, as W.H. Auden once asked a servant class school boy on a cloudy day in Birmingham in the 1950s, is there anything more annoying than douchelips on a puddlewhack?

Your humble narrator’s incoherence is a clue to deeper meaning.

And by deeper meaning, I mean penguin slap as a euphemism for third world debt crisis.

Wait,… My Random Tom Waits Lyric Generator was accidentally turned on. Sorry about that.

Last week saw Bleeth and Oldbag, Lobes and Greek Crotch Dance, Bathroom Douche Pics and White Trash Cuddle.

But none were billy goat slap quite like Tony the Curdle, or as tasty as Butt Pooch Adriana.

Chalk ‘em for what’s shaping up to be a strong first Monthly in 2012, and your humble and confused author for Raisin Bran.

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# posted by douchebag1
Links n' stuff:
7:10 am January, 9 Ohio FJ said...

Those really are some bodacious ta-ta’s.

7:15 am January, 9 Nancy Dreuche said...

As always, great boobs FTW.

7:30 am January, 9 Et Tu Douche? said...

I still feel Wise Black Man Howlin’ Cats pain.

8:12 am January, 9 Medusa Oblongata said...

Wise Black Man Howlin’ Cat says, “Figures. Always givin’ prizes to these white motherfuckers. Oh, wait, never mind, dey deserve dat one.” [wails on harmonica as he slips into a dark alley]

8:16 am January, 9 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Wise Black Man Howlin Cat wants to know why his vote (a pool cue to the groin) wasn’t counted.

8:18 am January, 9 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

I feel like there is some secret code hidden in Adriana’s holy clevite, but I can’t quite make it out.

8:30 am January, 9 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Wise Black Man Howlin’ Cat won’t vote for any of them jive-ass honkies.

8:44 am January, 9 hermit said...

Wise Black Man Howlin’ Cat stores bath soap and love beads in his uncircumcised foreskin.

8:46 am January, 9 hermit said...

Wise Black Man Howlin’ Cat grinds asphalt with his toenails.

8:59 am January, 9 hermit said...

Wise Black Man Howlin Cat has already broken all of his New Years resolutions.
.
.
.
with a steel pipe.

8:59 am January, 9 Wedgie said...

Rampant Rhesus Poo-Fling has got to make the list of new band names for 2012. I smell a new Douchie category brewing.

9:01 am January, 9 hermit said...

Wise Black Man Howlin Cat foresees The Rev’s Giants winning it all.

9:05 am January, 9 Choad The Douche Sprocket said...

Back in the Stone Age…like 1973 or somewheres…Hef and his go-to, PG-13-rated wack factory featured a skinny Scandinavian blonde with giant naturals named Liv or Hedgarthe or something. Ever since those stained pages, we’ve had a weakness for willowy tufts of golden, silken strands upon a pale mons pubis….lying below preternaturally preeminent torpedoes.
.
.
.We aspired to meet one of these beauties (or both of them) for years…but never bagged one despite hundreds of expeditionary pursuits — none, unfortunately to Iceland or Sweden.
.
.
These days, we simply admire these delicious aberrations of nature from afar. And “from afar” we mean whenever we’re viewing one of these on a daily basis:

A Clockwork Orgy
A Fistful of Penis
A League of their Moan
A Midsummer Night’s Cream
A Penile Action
A Penis Runs Through It
A Tale of Two Titties
Alice in Penisland
All Hands on Dick
Ally McFeel
Almost Anus
American Booty
American History XXX
An Officer and a Genitalman
Anus the Menace
Apollo 69
Armaget-it-on
Ass Ventura: Smut Detective
Austin Prowler

Backseat Confidential
Ball the President’s Men
Bang Her Sisters
Barbara’s Bush
Bat Dude and Throbin
Battlestar Orgasmica
Be Inside Her
Beauty and the b**tch
Beaver and Buttface
Beaver Juice
Ben-Hur Over
Benny in June
Between the Cheeks
Beverly Hills 9021-Ho!
Beverly Hills Cock
Bi-Curious George
Bi-Dazzled
Big Trouble in Little Vagina
Boldfinger
Bone Alone
Bonfire of the Panties
Booty and the Beast
Bridget Jones’ Hairy
Buffy the Vampire Layer
Butch Lesbian and the Lapdance Kid

Charlie’s Anals
City Of Anals
Cliff Banger
Cockodile Dun-me
Colonel Angus
Coo-coo for Cocoa khocks
Confessions of a Candystriper
Crimson Ride

Fast Times At Deep Crack High
For Your Thighs Only
Foreskin Gump
Forrest Hump
Free Will Humping
Free Your Willy
Frisky Business

Gang Bang Princess
Gangbangs of New York
Genital Hospital
Little Oral Annie
Little Orphan Anal
Lord of the Cock Rings

Natural Born Thrillers
Night of the Giving Head
NYPD Goo

Oh Brother, Who phukk Thou?
Oh Cum on Ye Faces
On Golden Blonde
One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Breast
One Spewed Over the Cuckoo’s Nest

Phallus in Wonderland
Picnic at Hanging Cock
Piledriving Miss Daisy
Pimped By An Angel
Playmate of the Apes

Pleasureville
Pocahotass
Poke-’em All: The Movie
Politically Erect

Pornochio
Position Impossible
Pulp Friction
Pumping Irene
Rambone
Rambutt
Rawshank Redemption
Rear and Pleasant Danger
Rebel Without a Condom
Regarding Hiney
Remember the Tightuns’
Reservoir bi**ches
Riding Miss Daisy
Romancing the Bone
Romeo in Juliet
Rosemary’s Booby

Saturday Night Beaver
Saving Ryan’s Privates
Schindler’s Fist
Screw The Right Thing

Tailiens
Tales from the Clit
The Air Down There
The Bare b**tch Project
The Bare Wench Project
The B**tches of Madison County
The Bootyguard
The Cock
The Dirty Dozen Inches
The Dominatrix Unloaded
The Empire Strokes back
The Majesdick
The Nads-u-ate
The Naked Bun
The Next Penetration
The Object of My Erection
The Ozporns
The Pink Mile
The Porn Birds
The Pourne Identity
The Replacement Drillers
The Reproducers
The Rocky Porno Video Show
The Rodfather
The Screwman Show
The Sexorcist
The Sixth Inch
The Slutty Professor
The Sopornos
The Sperminator
The Talented Mr. Lickme
The Texas Dildo Masquerade
The Touchables
The White Stuff
The Whore of the Worlds
The XXX Files
The Yeastmaster
The Young and the Breastless
Thighs Wide Open
Thighs Wide Shut
Three Men on a Lady
Throbbin Hood

Waiting To XXXhale
Wet Dreams May Come
Wetness for the Prosecution
When Harry Ate Sally
White Men Can’t Hump
Who Reamed Roger Rabbit?
Who’s Eating Gilbert Grape?
Whore Of The Rings

9:07 am January, 9 Vin Douchal said...

Wise Black Man Howlin Cat whittles discarded Dodge Aries into Vespa scooters with his pinkie toe bunions

9:09 am January, 9 Vin Douchal said...

@ Choad DTS
.
Yeesh ^

9:18 am January, 9 Choad The Douche Sprocket said...

My favorite is Free Your Willy…or maybe Wetness for the Prosecution.

9:42 am January, 9 DarkSock said...

Wise Black Man Howlin’ Cat jams with Bill Clinton; they trade licks on his whore-Monica.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
sorry…

9:49 am January, 9 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

If Choad didn’t copy and paste that then the judicial system is stopped and all the Vegas restaurants must have closed.
.
Exhibitionists

9:51 am January, 9 Choad The Douche Sprocket said...

@Rev: yes, no and really no….they just always make me laugh…..;-}

9:55 am January, 9 Nancy Dreuche said...

@Choad, thanks for alphabetizing them. Almost as cool as my “I’d rather be fucking” bumper stickers I was thinking about making.

10:40 am January, 9 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Jesus, Choad, that all you got? Amateur.

12:17 pm January, 9 Choad The Douche Sprocket said...

@Dude – plagiarizing and cut-and-pasting takes time!

12:17 pm January, 9 Choad The Douche Sprocket said...

….especially with one hand.

1:09 pm January, 9 Wedgie said...

Fuccen Sprocket, you left Edward Penishands off your list?
The second-best porn movie ever made. You, sir, are no Al Goldstein.

1:30 pm January, 9 Et Tu Douche? said...

Wise Black Man Howlin’ Cats technique for dry rubbing & subsequent slow cooking of Porch Beef is unparalleled.
.
Fact!!!!

1:47 pm January, 9 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Wise Black Man Howlin’ Cat has 2 terabytes of porn just for the letter A.

2:40 pm January, 9 CB Popped said...

Wise Black Man Howlin’ Cat plays a good Tele when he brings his A game.

8:02 pm January, 9 Stephanie said...

Beaver and Buttface…ha ha ha

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