Friday, March 16, 2012
Froey Buttafucco
What’s that?…
In the distance…
That strange buzzing noise…
Why… it’s a Blueberry Snot Pie!!
And it’s whizzing… right… towards… Winkolio’s face…
SPLAT!!
I would chew through legion of intertwined dancing licorice koalas just for the chance to softly rub the childhood blankie of the Malaysian seamstress who helped vulcanize the rubber that produced Lindsey’s taut boobal sweat. And then I would repose with a port wine, and read her Chaucer.
Side boob from the front, as well as imagining this tool flailing around with his head on fire, is a great way to pass the time while waitin’ for the ol’ Friday pear to be posted.
Epic side boob on button-cute blondie with the fingernails of an auto mechanic. What a fuccen turn on. She could flush my radiator anytime, flush I says
I doubt if the bleeth even reads….but if she does, Chaucer might be a bit above her skill set.
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.US magazine is more likely her cup of tea….with a side of Peruvian flake.
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Escobars
I like blonde girls with leather vests, in chains.
I like blonde girls with leather vests, pissing on me.
I like blonde girls with leather vests, in chains with Sarah Palin glasses.
I like blonde girls with leather vests, pussy scrubbing my face Mulatto-style.
I like blonde girls in leather vests, doing keg stands with two dildos up their ass.
I like blonde girls with leather vests, chewing on my unit while singing Whitney Houston songs.
Indeed Lindsey’s taut frontal side boobal reveal is outstanding!!!
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She can adjust my viscosimeter anytime.
I like blonde girls woth leather vests, singing the national anthems at a playoff hockey while they have gyroscopes shoved up their Monkey Holes.
Excuse me, I was having a low blood sugar moment. Time to get drunker. Son.
She can grease my tierod anytime.
I’d let her lube my chassis anytime… Wait what?
The Rev sounds like he is in the throes of a March Madness Maker’s Mark Bender. I am about to join him.
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That being said, am I being too picky when I point out latex boobie bleeth above has horrendous man hands?
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She can borrow my lug nuts anytime.
I like blonde girls with leather vests, except when they have man hands and are wearing a douchebag as a cape.
I think I will root for UVA today because UVA says to me, University of Vagina.
I like blonde girls with leather vests, except when they have hands that are bigger and manlier than mine.
Girls who don’t make the cheerleading squad in middle school shouldn’t get discouraged and not try out for cheerleading in high school, because when girls get discouraged, they start to get angry. When they get angry, they hang around other angry girls. When they hang around other angry girls and get angrier they start to hate their fathers. When the hate their fathers and develop “Daddy Issues,” they start hanging around with guys their father hates. When they start hanging around with guys their father hates, they wind up getting rear mounted by Froey Buttafucco in a night club. Don’t get rear mounted by Froey Buttafucco in a night club.
Her future’s so bright she’s gotta wear shades.
Apparently, the sun never sets in Coolville.
Look closely, I think the shades are covering up the shiner Buttafucco gave her last night for talking while he was watching that Jerz Shore show.
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What do 10,000 battered women have in common ? They just don’t listen.
I was going to do this now, but I think tonight I’ll pour a glass of Velvet and settle in for a night with 64 “Wow” worthy hot chicks:
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Barstool U Smokeshow of the Year Bracket 2012
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I think you’re being a bit too picky @doucheywallnuts.
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.Trim those nails and get rid of that $4 manicure, and those fingers would fit right where @Rev Chad wants them.
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.Cornholios
Yo, I’d Fuccaboobo or two ova deh.
@Vin,
Thanks for the link should be fun and by fun I mean fun.
^Douchey Wallnuts is correct, almost. I am drinking Bushmills chazed with caned guiness while I sweat over the four 5 gallon pot of stew I’mma getting reddy for the three days and 70-odd children and milfs and there dates at my three parties. Gonna be fun cause teh Mrs is off the wagoon and drinking irisb coffess all weekend. Gonna be needing some more Black Bush darlink. And by black bush I mean booze and nature bush. Fucking hippys. Got grenn rollin papers two! I love boiled turnips. Sin.
@Vin Thanks for the link. I enjoyed the seedings. And by enjoyed the seedings I mean I ejaculated on my laptop.
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Any Barstool favs?
Bars and stool pretty much sums up my life right now…
Man, that Barstool Bracket is exhausting. I need a bit of time for each of those pairings, preferably with a video interview and a barrel of rum. And “live viewing” for the second round. Beyond that, I fear the ‘sloppy seconds’.
You know you all like her man hands all over you,don’t you?