Thursday, May 10, 2012
The Gloumpa Gets Lucky
Gloumpas need love, too.
Hot Chicks With Douche Bags
PICTURES OF HOT CHICKS WITH TOTAL AND COMPLETE DOUCHEBAGS. WITH COMMENTARY.
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Hall of Mock
- Pfah
- DarkSock
- Baron Von Goolo
- Troy Tempest
- Steve L
- Wheezer
- Medusa Oblongata
- creature
- Crucial Head
- Mr. White
- Archidoucheis
- Mr. Biggs
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- Whoop-di-douche
- Jacques Doucheteau
- massengill
- Dr. Bunsen Honeydouche
- Mr. Scrotato Head
- Deltus
- The Reverend Chad Kroeger
- mr.reeve
- Wedgie
- Et Tu Douche?
- Eliza Douchcoo
- dbBen
- soy bomb
- DoucheyWallnuts
- I R A Darth Aggie
- jonezy
- Hermit
- Chris in ‘Baghdad
- Douchble Helix
- the douche is alright
- Choad the Douche Sprocket
- Stephanie
- The Dude
- Dude McCrudeshoes
- Sir David Douchenborough
- Il Douché
- Bag A
- douche equis
- Capt. James T. Douche
- Charles Nelson Douchely
- THEONETRUEDOUCHE
- Merle Baggard
- ehcuodouche
- Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt
- Charles Douchewin
- FredN.
- Ol' Dirty Douchebag
- In memoriam: bcs
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This photo was taken three seconds before the bouncers at Richard’s Rendez-Vous Gentleman’s Club beat the snot out of Gloumpa for sneaking backstage.
This is my tooter.
And she’s his tutor.
She’s sitting on the intake for the air system. Scenting out of the vents are cellulite cream, strawberry K-Y and King Taco farts
In the rarely visited hallway behind the driver’s ed classrooms, Tiffany found herself once again turning one of her young, impressionable students into a man. Sure, it was wrong. But it felt so right. It felt like a 240 lb. bag of marshmallows and gym socks, but still, it felt so right.
Immediately following this picture he asked her to pull his finger.
Check this out:
.
First came this:
.
.
.
Then the parody:
.
Immediately following this picture he asked for his Pokemon cards back.
How can we live in a world where the fat kid from The Sopranos gets to brush pibbles with an un-Thighmastered “blonde” wearing orthopedic shoes?
I just watched FOX News for about two hours, so you’d think my brain would as tenderized to accept outlandish notions that defy common sense as it could possibly be. And yet, I reject what I’m seeing here.
Awww man you guys are fuckin’ mean. All I’m saying is I’m glad there are no pics of me when I was 15 floating around on the interwebs. I give Frankie FivePizzas a temporary pass. He might grow out of it. My hope for the human race is not yet extinguished.
And I like her chubby thighs, Dreuche.
I wonder what the arrangement was?
@Douche Springsteen, well then, I guess I misjudged everybody on here. Frankie FivePizzas will only get a pass after the ungelification of his hair however. Cuz right now he is looking like a bloated Justin Bieber.
I think Gloumpa is a chick. And that’s all I have to say about that.
.
@McCrudeshoes, Spaz Bono?
After heavy negotiations the Gloumpa and Peroxide Jane came to an agreement, in exchange for a single 5 second boob feel above the shirt and bra as well as a single 3 second panty shot the Gloumpa forfeits his mothers ATM card with accompanying PIN, the $36.86 in his Captain America novelty wallet, the contents of all his pockets which included 3 watermelon Jolly Ranchers that are semi-fused together due to body heat and sweat, one bus pass, his Wal-Mart greeter badge, an expired albuterol inhaler from 2009, a coupon for a free value meal upgrade at a local fast food joint and a half used sample of Axe hairgel that came in the Sunday ads.
Mom took her son clubbing because she couldn’t afford a sitter.
.
Times are hard.
that’s some hindquarter Charlene is sportin…I can just imagine the fine checkerboard welt my tennis racket would give rise to!
That fat dude is only with that chick cause his dad just operated on my rotten daughters arm this afternoon on the public dime. Fucking Canadian comsoclists! And she I would put on a pedestal to suck and then fucle the first cellulite dimple that has appeared on her succulent post-pubescent thigh.
@Vin 2:10p, my way of parodying that song is changing the words to Somebody that I used to blow. It’s more romantic that way.
@dreuche, or Chaz Ohnoo
little do you all realise but they will FALL IN LOVE and then they will GET MARRIED and he will stuff his chubby in her veeeeejay and he will fil her twat with baby batter and she will conceive a child and it will grow up to look like this:
http://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b324/PepsiMan34/FatGothKid.jpg
Ooo! I got an 80’s movie quote!
“it’s your mom, dude!”
Thank you.
Herman gets to touch a hooker hired for his 13th birthday. Today he became a man who will grow up with unhealthy prostitute fetish issues that can only be found late at night on inner city streets and back alleys.
pretty sure thats not a dude.
That’s a $20 trick the dude used his allowance money to buy for 5 minutes in the basement utility room of their walk-up. But he lost his nerve once the door closed and all he got was an iPhone photo and some (fake) bragging rights…
He needs her to call his Mom for a ride home.
Stripper Mom and Son backstage.
I think this picture opens up a new category of douchebag – the Little Brother ‘Bag.
–
Christina is a sophmore at Whatsamatta U, “improved” her looks since high school, and has at least a semblance of a social life now. Her parents made her let her little brother, Owen, visit when he was done with his high school midterms. While on campus, Owen is staying with the guy who has a hopeless crush on Christina (maybe is even from her hometown but didn’t go to the same high school) but Christina has no interest in him, but is happy to use his crush to her evil, sorority-giggle benefit.
Christina agreed to take Owen to a frat party, under Owen’s threat to tell their parents that Christina had an abortion her freshman year. It’s not true, but Christina knows the grief she will endure from her parents won’t make arguing worth it.
Owen shows up to her dorm dressed like this. Little does Christina know, Owen has attempted to fashion himself as a bit of a “player” back home; Owen has turned his pimp-ness to “11” just for this occassion. Christina’s jaw drops and decides no matter how big the blow-out with her parents as a result of Owen’s lie, her fledgling social life is not worth this – she didn’t starve herself freshman year and drink only no-calorie Zima for this shit.
So Christina hatches a plan – she hands Owen a drink to “pregame” knowing this kid gets high off half a wine cooler and will now be off his guard. They pose for this pic, Owen putting on his mack-inest face because he thinks he has a chance with Christina’s roommate Jane holding the camera. Dammit, Owen is hot tonight!
When he asks where the bathroom is to check his hair, Christina and Jane bolt. Their ride is waiting, double-parked in the quad.
Owen exits the bathroom to an empty hallway, already a little tipsy. It takes him a full 15 minutes to realize he’s been ditched, the whole time getting looks and snickers from other students passing him in the hallway.
When Christina’s parents confront her about ditching her little brother and her alleged freshman year abortion, Christina whips out this photo, says “I took him to a party and he got so drunk he threw up and blacked out.”
Owen is now in the hot seat, and is grounded. Now he can’t go to prom with the desparate junior he had a pregnacy scare with last spring break.
Related to nothing at all…
.
Now, that’s acting!
.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/11/brooklyn-decker-sheer-dress-battleship-premiere_n_1508824.html
Wash that goop out of your hair and put on a nice shirt and I’ll give you a notta and go in peace. Continuing down this path leads to the douche-side.
Wow, great outtake from this week’s Time Magazine cover photo shoot.
^THIS
.
AND…..
.
She seems to have some hail damage on her thighs.
^^THIS
and
^THIS
LOL
Hail damage FTW