Friday, September 7, 2012

Friday Haiku

Kandi Kane enjoys
Her new ‘bag stereo:
In Douche 2.0

This situation
Has ruined any hope of
Legalization

– Capt. James T. Douche

Even Jane Goodall
couldn’t wrap her mind around
this social construct.

– Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche

The Clit/Hemp combo
Is not enough to rouse twins
Out of drug stupor

– DoucheyWallnuts

She has stopped breathing
Since the gyroscope was put
In her Chronic Hole.

– The Reverend Chad Kroeger

Pot leaf on her cooch
bondage tape on her nipples
Bad choices ev’rywhere.

– Morbo

“After you bang me
Leave your hats on this here shelf.
These are from today.”

– DoucheyWallnuts

Everything they wear,
think, speak is branded. Faces
need branding iron.

– Wheezer

Hooker on the floor
Ping ping balls fired from biznatch
Might be injuries

– Vin Douchal

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
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# posted by DarkSock
Links n' stuff:
6:24 am September, 7 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

This is a Shipwreck
Of such epic proportions
Let’s weep for Mankind!

6:25 am September, 7 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

There’s not enough weed
in the world to get me near
wherever this is.

6:26 am September, 7 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Wiggas have an orgy
The Mayan prophecy comes
To pass we are doomed!

6:27 am September, 7 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Katy Perry hits
the skids HARD after Mayer
dumping. Rock bottom.

6:28 am September, 7 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Looks like black-taped boobs.
They should get rolls for faces -
The Real nasty bits!

6:28 am September, 7 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Remember kids just
Say no to dope which should not
Be hard to do now!

6:29 am September, 7 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Is the one in the
middle the secret triplet?
Chills on back of neck.

6:31 am September, 7 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Pre-op or post-op?
Doesn’t matter. My eyes can’t
unsee this horror.

6:33 am September, 7 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Even they can have
a moment of clarity
by looks on faces.

6:34 am September, 7 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

So what happens when
all three get gyroscopes put
in their monkey holes?

6:35 am September, 7 saulgoode42 said...

Ever since their split
Kristen Stewart’s had trouble
Replacing her douche

6:35 am September, 7 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Bastard children of
Marshall Mathers drop seed in
Meth addict love chute

6:37 am September, 7 saulgoode42 said...

Twin douchebags love weed
So much so, in fact, they got
This new joint roller

6:37 am September, 7 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Post shrimping buffet
The wiggas use her monkey
Hole for some bong hits

6:39 am September, 7 Douche Wayne said...

Not cool, Darksock, not cool.
I’m not playing.

6:40 am September, 7 Capt. James T. Douche said...

This situation
Has ruined any hope of
Legalization

6:42 am September, 7 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Hey! Look at my zool
Not these drug addled douchebags
Ignore smell of shrimp

6:43 am September, 7 Capt. James T. Douche said...

The twins strike again
Race relations are ruined
For next 50 years!

6:43 am September, 7 Douche Wayne said...

I can only hope
it’s medical reefer and
they’re on their deathbeds.

6:47 am September, 7 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Things like this makes folks
Climb to a tall ledge with a
High power rifle!

6:48 am September, 7 DoucheyWallnuts said...

For some strange reason
This scene gives me a renoB
I need therapy

6:48 am September, 7 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Mark your calendar
Today is the day hip hop
Officially died

6:50 am September, 7 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Even Jane Goodall
couldn’t wrap her mind around
this social construct.

6:51 am September, 7 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Few of us in life
Will experience the taste
Of our brothers cum

6:54 am September, 7 DoucheyWallnuts said...

The ecstasy twins
Scored a bleeth for a threesome
Need more ecstasy

6:56 am September, 7 DoucheyWallnuts said...

The Captain’s Haiku
Made me vomit in my pants
Picture makes me weep

6:59 am September, 7 Capt. James T. Douche said...

So nauseated
I cant take it, sticking my
Finger down my throat

7:01 am September, 7 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Magical pasties
Hide her perky pink nipples
Can’t hide the douche twins

7:03 am September, 7 Douche Wayne said...

Looks like the scene in
Se7en where almost-dead guy
tied to bed for years.

7:03 am September, 7 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Each twin has a sore.
Aids Karposi’s by left eyes?
And she is a sore.

7:06 am September, 7 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Lesson learned? Never
say “I’ll do anything to
be famous!” Regrets.

7:07 am September, 7 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Acid reflux and
bile taste in mouth force meto
stop writing haikus.

7:10 am September, 7 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Somewhere her dad is
Standing on the side of a
Very tall building

7:11 am September, 7 I R A Darth Aggie said...

Let the douche twins
smoke each other,
I’ll take care of Kandi

7:13 am September, 7 DoucheyWallnuts said...

The Clit/Hemp combo
Is not enough to rouse twins
Out of drug stupor

7:33 am September, 7 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

She has stopped breathing
Since the gyroscope was put
In her Chronic Hole.

7:36 am September, 7 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

It puts the weed in
It’s pussy or it gets the
Hose. Water bong hose.

7:36 am September, 7 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Chronic or Hydro
4/20 or Johnny Blaze
I’d fuck her, I says

7:38 am September, 7 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Generation z
Still loves the happy tunes of
Miss Patty Smith. Son

7:39 am September, 7 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

The Unsubs were found
Sneerfully chewing the last part
Of her Mons Pubis.

7:39 am September, 7 Capt. James T. Douche said...

After the twins came
In her, she has been rendered
Way unfuckable

7:40 am September, 7 Choad the Douche Sprocket said...

Crystal meth groupies
always find lowest common
demonimator

7:43 am September, 7 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

After torturing
Selena Gomez. The twins work
Through lesser known meat.

7:44 am September, 7 Capt. James T. Douche said...

These two losers even
Fuck with those stupid hats on
I can’t stop puking!

7:45 am September, 7 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

There is a line you
Can’t cross getting your “red wings.”
She’s the thin red line.

7:46 am September, 7 Douche Wayne said...

Judging from the smell
that weed is laced with failure
and bad decisions.

7:53 am September, 7 Morbo said...

Circus must be here
How else to explain freakshow?
Dollar gets ya crabs

7:57 am September, 7 Morbo said...

Pot leaf on her cooch
bondage tape on her nipples
Bad choices ev’rywhere.

8:00 am September, 7 Morbo said...

Eurobag twins have
key to her heart — and only
key to basement door

8:16 am September, 7 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

“Self Made” hat on ledge
apparently only sold
to the unemployed

8:19 am September, 7 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

even gyroscope
won’t go in her monkey hole
without condom on

8:23 am September, 7 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Romney’s grandchildren
Throw in towel after Biden
Clinton speeches. Me too.

8:41 am September, 7 Scrotewank Jones and the furry furry Douchetrots said...

Let the scrotes fondle
Strung out Katy Perry who’d
Still get a suckle

8:46 am September, 7 Scrotewank Jones and the furry furry Douchetrots said...

Wiggas fondle thigh
After puffin dat phat blunt
Bitch be lookin fly

8:47 am September, 7 DoucheyWallnuts said...

“After you bang me
Leave your hats on this here shelf.
These are from today.”

9:03 am September, 7 Vin Douchal said...

Everyone glances
At puddle of greasy goo
Ducks floating on it

9:04 am September, 7 Vin Douchal said...

All look down in shame
Come down from meth, realize
“We’re waste of carbon”

9:06 am September, 7 Vin Douchal said...

Hooker on the floor
Ping ping balls fired from biznatch
Might be injuries

9:08 am September, 7 Vin Douchal said...

Electrodes on nips
Fire up generator
All zapped on contact

9:32 am September, 7 Colossus of Choads said...

watching Hannah’s Field
Goss bros. rethink life choices
puff puff give? no thanks

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AQe4XVrJFGQ

11:46 am September, 7 Wheezer said...

A humidor for
Blunts? OK. Humidor for
a—–CONTROL YOURSELVES.

11:48 am September, 7 Wheezer said...

Legalize it? Well,
if she’s 18, I guess we
have to accept it.

11:54 am September, 7 Wheezer said...

Only her pasties
would be smiling here in The
Land of Misfit Scrotes.

11:56 am September, 7 Wheezer said...

These flaming choads share
their “gorgeouth” pink underwear;
skid marks included.

12:02 pm September, 7 Wheezer said...

Everything they wear,
think, speak is branded. Faces
need branding iron.

12:14 pm September, 7 Wheezer said...

“I did not inhale.”
Slick Willie speaks truth this time;
used cigar instead.

12:17 pm September, 7 Wheezer said...

“A-T-L…..’zat where
we live, brah?” “Don’t know, bro; I
flunked Geometry.”

12:35 pm September, 7 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Six hours later
This still gives me a renoB
Need therapy. Stat.

1:08 pm September, 7 Morbo said...

She gets 90/hour
These guys scraped up five bucks in
nickels and won’t leave

1:13 pm September, 7 Morbo said...

“Make a wish,” ‘Bags said.
Kandi ponders … World peace? Food?
Nah. More drugs, sex, STAT!

1:16 pm September, 7 Morbo said...

Bondage tape on nips
hurts like a bitch when removed
or so I’ve been told

4:51 pm September, 7 Little Willie said...

Who let the retard twins out of their cages? Hopefully they remembered to tranq them up so they don’t get too excited or break something. Flat chested Kandi is a little on the rough side. So young to have the too many miles look already. The marijuana decal on her bikini bottom right over her privates hopefully conceals a tight shaven pussy rather than a small underdeveloped, hormone shrunken penis typical of rough looking flat chested trannies.

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