Saturday, September 7, 2013
This Pic Makes Me Want to Set My Scrotundae On Fire
We’ve been though a lot of HCwDB combos over the years, you and I.
A lot.
Some heinous. Some mediocre. Some silly. Some annoying.
But rare is the (un)perfect combo of silly tattwad showing groin shave douchal atrocity in presence of so perfect a bikini hott suckle thigh as we witness here on the beach. Beachbag Dave and Cuddle Perfect Suckle Lisa cohabiting requires scrotundae fire-worthy groinal self-immolation.
And I don’t set my scrotundae on fire for just any HCwDB combo.
But this one I do.
Very nice fake boobies on that one. Others take note.
I should be hittin’ that.
.
If she’s 18.
Idiot with a California Angels tatt wearing an Oakland A’s hat. That’s like sporting a Yankee hat while displaying a Red Sox tattoo …. or a “Free Palestine” t-shirt with a Star of David tatt poking out, or a KKK guy with an “SS” tattoo wearing an Obama “Hope” hat
.
So,… leads us to believe ,…
.
a) He’s a dope
b) She’s an A’s fan ( sheeit, I’d wear a Yankee hat for a day to tap that)
c) He is an oblivious ignoramus
d) Her snatch is heavenly
e) He’s a dope
f) Her pussy is where rainbows and unicorns live
g) He’s a dope
h) Her sex makes a man go goofy… and shit
i) He’s a dope
j) She’s HoH material (there’s a second photo of her out there, trust me, she’s in )
Every time these two reach coitus, another American gets measles.
Her cheap fake bronzing lotion cracked under her bikini…
.
Makes her look like she has cookies and cream cottage cheese thighs…
.
Youse guys can keep her.
Cuddle Perfect Suckle Lisa: she will be mine! (And her blonde friend in the background, too.)
.
Beachbag Dave: he will be gone! (And his bro in the background, too.)
A’s cap and California Angels tattoo. That in itself is a crime against nature.
I want to wash her hair. With me balls.
.
TeaShaggers
On another note, me and my bud (who convinced DB1 a few years back to eat a turtle in New Orleans, true story) were in Nashville yesterday knockin’ around after the Maiden/Megadeth concert (respect) and we look over and see this kinda hott lookin’ olde lady in the car next to us at the light, except it’s Steven Tyler and (I hope) his rather young daughter. I give him the nod, he nods back.
.
Uncle Salties.
Steven Tyler and Joan Rivers…..separated at birth (or on the plastic surgeon’s table)?
you’re scaring me darksock, but, in a different way than usual…now you wanna tell us about this ‘bud’?
We ate a turtle once
Well I’ll tell yas. I just officated at a solemn Anglican ( I think you Southerners call it Episcopalian) wedding as adjunct ex officio Chaplain (respect) cause my religion is only recognized in the Hippie (respect) areas of Western USMEXICANADA. I’ve had a boner hidden in my loose suit pants cause for 9 hours of the weight loss from going back to work and losing on my drinking hours8 fuccen hours lessened, for hot fucking chicks, no douchebags. I mean the weight loss loosenesd my pantyies and the chicks were smoking. They weren’t falling for the married silver foxes, again. But you can never forget that you are alive and in a different theatre you could have fucked that awkward Mulatress that kept bringing you drinks when she was a hired hand few years ago. Too few years ago. So some band that called themselves the Stoned Temple Pilots showed up and they were awesome as I shyly traded glances with the young MILF I had been trading glances with while Mrs. Kroeger avoided the view, passed out in an ole buddies car. Sons.
.
Lou Diamond Phillips in 1981