Saturday, January 22, 2005

Friday Thoughts n’ Links n’ Underboob ‘n Such

aquaflog
DarkSock here with the Naked Truth. And for heralding that truth I’ve received a certain amount of well-deserved celebrity. Because this Jersey Jihad is our collective dream. We know what we stand for. The day Jay Louis (if that is his real name) lost a woo-hott to some greasy trust-fund troglodyte the gauntlet was thrown; shit got real. This site reached unimaginable peaks, and though the salad days have passed, we’re still holding it together here.

Oh, we have accomplished historic things. We have defined and attacked Nastiness and ugliness. Sometimes what you must witness is hard to grasp. We will cope by any means necessary. We reflect and struggle and render our judgments in solitude. Although probably not like Reverend Chad.

Yet we’re hardly scratched the surface of the virgin territory of What. Is. Douche.

Speaking of “virgin territory”, here’s why you slavering beasts keep clicking these links, like lab vermin waiting for them sweet sweet pellets o’ female topography:

Epic Underboob

Super Epic UnderBoob

Leia Buns n Mons

Snake in the Weeds Pear

Berry Nice Pear

Point Pear

Glutimous Maximus Pear. Son.

# posted by DarkSock
2:44 pm May, 2 DarkSock said...

This thing on? *tap tap*

5:13 pm May, 2 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Is that snake in the weeds pear that Lauren Graham chick http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IHR5ljAFCGE? Did I tell you guys I met Carrie Underwood’s house last time Lenny and I went up Ottawa way. Fuck you hockey playing dumbasses and all your hot chicks? I’m looking at you Lucic!
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Dark Sock laughs at the Canadiana/Adirondack pretence of the dwelling for he is an auteur among architects and likes his shit angular like the way he rides his boat (s). Pedestrian celebrity drivel. I killed the deal. Fuck you Mike Fisher!
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http://www.countryweekly.com/news/take-peek-inside-carrie-underwood-and-mike-fishers-canadian-house.
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I got an abcessed face and buddy don’t work Fridays.
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Dentists……22

6:10 pm May, 2 UFO Destroyers said...

Mary-Louise Parker is who you are thinking of Rev.
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Super Epic underboob looks very uncomfortable. Seems that she went to a casting call of Robin (Labia) Hood and thought she was going to be cast as Friar Tuck. Instead it was Triar Fucc.
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I hate 6.

7:03 pm May, 2 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

^The girl from the show about pot. I get it. I’m stoooned. As she appears in that picture, she is my perfect Eve. And by Eve I mean, anal. What a glorious ass…………………The old man gets wood watching her youthful spirit and body emit gamma rays of sweetness and perephones. She smells like earth and roses as her womanhood engorges with blood as she excites and swells and aches for my Jesus-sized cock and tongue and darting aggressive hands and shit. I’d bone her hard and I’d bone her dirty the way the Bad Santa chick did
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16. Son.

7:33 pm May, 2 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I am the reckoner. Abandon naught sailors. For chlamydhia and absinthe cubes do nay relent
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15

7:55 pm May, 2 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I am the reckoner. Abandon naught sailors. For chlamydhia and absinthe cubes do nay relent. I look at the beauty of the Pear…but all thoughts run to Peaches Geldof and the majesty of RUSH which has allowed me to tolerate the Quebecer working in my office with the gutteral slang of the french language. RUSH fan powers activate.
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11

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8:36 pm May, 2 FredN. said...

Luv da underboob. Waiting on kids party now – what alcoholic liquid you fuccers recommend for maximum get-through-this-ability

10:30 pm May, 2 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Everclear 90, son.
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Did we ever discuss if Pink is fuccable? I say yes with my vagina. I say maybe with me flaccid old cock and saggy balls. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i1ZheSItadY
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23

5:47 pm May, 4 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Pink has that half-a-midget, Carney, gymnast vibe going with that short hair she could pass for a guy if the lighting is just right. But then again you never can depend on that light.
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Fuccin 7

5:50 pm May, 4 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Leia buns n mons gives me all kinds a retro wood. And by retro wood I mean rubbin it out something fierce.

11:16 pm May, 4 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I just put about $30 worth of empties out with the recycling, knowing the habits of the city people that come out to the country for our valuable refuse. Thinking I had done a good deed, I went to put more garbage out, and buddy gave me shit for having messy empties.
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SHIT-CUNT-TWAT!
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Ungrateful hobos 17

4:01 am May, 5 DarkSock said...

Waiting on The Boss to figger out why suddenly I can’t post new posts….
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I CAN’T STAY HERE UNDER THESE CONDITIONS!!!

6:17 am May, 5 Jacques Doucheteau said...

A toast!

11:57 am May, 5 dickie fingers said...

Thanks Jacques!

9:06 pm May, 5 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Happy Cinco de Mayonaisse. And by cinco I mean
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http://www.xvideos.com/video534033/rammstein_-_pussy_-_music
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9

10:07 pm May, 5 hermit said...

I find the avatar assigned to me lewd, lascivious and personally offensive. Also, I am far too lazy and incompetent to rectify the situation. I consider this development untenable.
Fire departments advise folks assemble in a designated “safe spot.” A place to assemble in case tragedy strikes and a fiery inferno burns down the family home.
If this site should burn to the ground, don’t attempt to save the family pet or heirlooms. I suggest we assemble here.

It’s free, easy to operate and I think FLYTEETHE is out of the county lockup.
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Slaphoarz
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12:00 am May, 6 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Remembers to get yo groove on before Cosmos comes on to blow my mind. Sons.
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19

8:31 pm May, 6 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

I thought Rev Chad was in Canada runnin Rob Ford’s re-election campaign
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http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/steven-cohen-street-performer-who-3499592

9:37 pm May, 6 hermit said...

Well that does it, I now have a new screensaver. Thanks FredN.

What, no math problem?

12:40 am May, 7 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Had to watch the wifes declining physical attractiveness tonight. Fuck you Father Time…Fuck You ! Saw her hanging labial fat folds hanging under her old empty tits! Does she think I want to fucking see this old shit? In the dark lady.
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Auld times rekindled with springs promising bounty. Two of Life’s great journeys in syncronicity on a day which I am blessed to have a small supply of Train Wrreck. I was so stoned yesterday Lenny had to call in sick for me after lunch. He said I ate bad mexican.
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One of the greater joys around these parts is the ascension of the Holy Habitants des Montreal Canadiens (REspekt) and a win like they had tonight over the vile and filthy Bruins. The other is the octannual van purchase and make the salesman cry night when I go to buy a car stoned as fuck with the nefarious Mrs. Kroeger as my stooge. Good cheap times.
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http://www.thestar.com/news/gta/2014/05/06/rob_ford_turned_away_at_us_border_report.html
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That Rob Ford has a complicated plan. And by plan I mean. Stoooooned.

2:18 pm May, 7 dickie fingers said...

Always best to hit the dealership at the end of the month when the have quotas to make. And make sure you are extra stoooooooned.

2:31 pm May, 7 Vin J Douchal said...

I don’t know how you ‘Nucks do THIS , but I like it.
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6:13 pm May, 7 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Rev there ain’t nothing sadder n a fine piece of ass aging poorly. Take that Terri Garr for instance. She was a prime piece of pussy back in the day an now her face looks like a Cow’s Udder. An she ain’t so old that she should look that bad. I’mst told she has meat curtains the size a giant flap jacks,
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And the Kathleen Turner broad was a prime lay an now she looks like she got her face beat with a hub cap from 57 Coupe de Ville. The shame of is she used to like it in the Goo Goo an now I wouldn’t go near that with Larry Storch’s crank. Crank, I says.

7:47 pm May, 7 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

^Vin’s Hab’s Girl would cost exactly $1,250 with cum in mouth and covered anal per hour. And you better take her out for the game and the whole $5,000 night for cum in ass and full on ball and ass licking. At that price you might as well get her blonde friend Lucy who’s a total starlet pig blonde for another $1,500 for the threesome at midnight. Just saying.
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An old flames decomposing body is quite depressing DW. Bitch better smarten up before cottage party season cause I’m on a roll.
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Larry Storch was best in blackface.
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7:16 pm May, 8 Et Tu Douche? said...

Not sure how I got back here, but it’s good to be back and see everyone in fine form.

1:11 am May, 9 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

This site is rolling on like Corbin Bernsen’s career.

1:14 am May, 9 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

This site is going off like wet firew.orks

1:14 am May, 9 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

This site is steaming ahead like the mighty Detroit City.

1:16 am May, 9 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

This site shines like a black hole. Hey Et Tu!

1:17 am May, 9 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Where did Wedgie go?

1:44 am May, 9 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Et Tu’s avatar looks like a cross between Mr Magoo and my bean bag.

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