Monday, April 25, 2005

Dick McDickWell wadda y’know…
Horizontal stripes also
Make things look shorter…

The Dude said…

His belly button protrudes
More than his little pecker
But Chad doesn’t mind

Vin Douchal said…

Why not display his
Greasy hair and odd naval
Next, fucck a squirrel

Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said…

Never confuse a
Craig’s list ad with Match.com
or you get these two.

DoucheyWallnuts said…

70s rocker
Appearance means “I live in
my mother’s basement.”

Dickey Fingers said…

Roto Rooter guy
has reason to celebrate
he unclogged the john.

Ed Hardy Har Har said…

Little white thingy
poking out top of his trunks.
It’s not a string, folks!

 

# posted by admin
4:41 am June, 25 The Dude said...

His belly button protrudes
More than his little pecker
But Chad doesn’t mind

4:47 am June, 25 The Dude said...

Nigel Tufnel called
He wants his vintage swimsuit
For Spinal Tap 2

8:16 am June, 25 Charles Douchewin said...

“I’m a seeker, too.
But my dreams aren’t like yours.
I can’t help thinking that somewhere in the universe there has to be something better than man.”
.
– Planet of the Apes Fraiku starts out normal, ends up pear-shaped.

8:17 am June, 25 Charles Douchewin said...

YOU MANIACS! YOU
BLEW IT UP! AH, DAMN YOU! GOD
DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!

3:41 pm June, 25 Vin Douchal said...

He tries ecstasy
First time, Troy Aikman relates
To some Raiders fans

4:01 pm June, 25 Vin Douchal said...

UPS driver
Stops, snaps selfie at this year’s
Anal Sex Toy Show

4:07 pm June, 25 Vin Douchal said...

Why not display his
Greasy hair and odd naval
Next, fucck a squirrel

6:05 pm June, 25 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Does Troy’s “Hang Loose” tell
us about choad’s bowels or
her poor oral skills?

6:09 pm June, 25 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Never confuse a
Craig’s list ad with Match.com
or you get these two.

6:11 pm June, 25 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Is it safe to say
this is the most awkward
family picnic?

6:14 pm June, 25 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Why do I think that
none of these three are allowed
close to a school zone?

6:16 pm June, 25 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Troy tries out new trick.
He tastes both fingers and then
identifies each.

7:12 pm June, 25 hermit said...

Vin D 3:41 FTW
(So far, but the week is young)

7:16 pm June, 25 hermit said...

Her blood test came back
From the STD clinic
B fuckingforewarned
.
Sons

7:45 pm June, 25 hermit said...

Cat Piss Amongst the Box Elders
.
A poem based in truth by Hermit
.
.
Why do I find myself lying prostrate on an unfamiliar lawn?
Dawn breaking weakly on the eastern horizon
Dried vomit and spittle cling stubbornly to face and clothes
Head throbbing- dehydrated- arid, foul
.
Fragmented memories of a night sky
Stars and distant planets spinning wildly
Vomiting heavily into the fresh-placed mulch
Mouth wide open, voluminous
Like Peter Griffin
Exaggerated, animated spew
.
And breaking through the haze
Its pungency strong like desolation
Cat Piss amongst the Box Elders

10:04 pm June, 25 Vin Douchal said...

Her ultimate quest
She’s a Dick Sherpa, she’s found
Her hairless Yeti

10:09 pm June, 25 Vin Douchal said...

Mortimer Largeman
“Hangs Loose” with societal
Shoe sole poo scrapings

10:11 pm June, 25 Vin Douchal said...

Mortimer Largeman
10 year high school reunion
Still feels out of place

10:16 pm June, 25 Vin Douchal said...

Mortimer Largeman
Hitched a ride with this couple
To S&M night

12:06 am June, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Halloween costumes
Come from Rockstar the movie.
Phillip Hoffman’s. ghost.

12:10 am June, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Those crazy nights, I
Do remember, in my youth.
I do recall those..

12:10 am June, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Were the best times, most
Of all. In the heat with
A blue jean girl….

12:12 am June, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Burnin’ love comes once
In a lifetime. She found me sitiing
By the rail road…

12:13 am June, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Track. Took me home, we
Danced like the moonlight. Those
Summer nights are callin’

12:14 am June, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Nixon was frameeed.
Henry Kissinger can suck
MY FUCKING COCK>

12:39 am June, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I remembered this
“Song” Whilst the Mrs. was rimming
Me yesterday Son.
.

12:57 am June, 26 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Juxtaposition:
Hang Loose H Connick Junior
With Hard Rock douchebags

12:59 am June, 26 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Horizontal Stripes
Were original Black Keys
But who gives a shit?

1:01 am June, 26 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Ombré hairdo Bleeth
Relies on Tankini Douche
For heroin fix

1:06 am June, 26 DoucheyWallnuts said...

70s rocker
Appearance means “I live in
my mother’s basement.”

1:11 am June, 26 DoucheyWallnuts said...

I’d hack this couple
Into small pieces and eat
Clams Posillipo

1:13 am June, 26 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Kansas tribute band
Convention is horrible
Place for normal folk

1:17 am June, 26 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Kierkegaard once said
Nothing that ever applies
To this arrangement

1:23 am June, 26 DoucheyWallnuts said...

His package protrudes
And his belly hair offends
All who venture near

1:26 am June, 26 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Rimming is lost art
Am I right when I say that?
I do it myself…

1:32 am June, 26 DoucheyWallnuts said...

I Feltch, therefore, I
am. Did Descartes say that or
Was it Andy Dick?

4:27 am June, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

^ DW has me at
hack…FTW so far, as Hermit
eloquently posited above.
.
PS: I remember when Dark Sock did’nt wear pantiies. Long may he be feared and rememberanced as he should be, the working dead black bastard.
.

4:30 am June, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Clams Possiblo is
Can of make insane gonna style
To DW’s, al Dente.

4:34 am June, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Hermit is along
The international border
With pervert Canchicks.
.
As the Hamburglar..
The dance in the moonlight
More Stalin old did.

4:35 am June, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

System has old dudes
Stone exterior..most official
Named due due. The

4:39 am June, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Activists best the
Opinion to settle
In Homoslavia.

.
AKA the end of the world that fucking half-assed fraud of a fucking name calling vacuum has only one of the famiily will find that fucker. Don’t ruin my past FM radiso!!QQQ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.
.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kFqXFE8OSG4

.

9:14 am June, 26 hermit said...

If DarkSock is black
Then he’s the only brother
Who listens to RUSH
.
(the band or Limbaugh)

6:47 pm June, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I came home really stoned from work today cause I was vaping in the executive retreat. And by retreat, I mean two-piece bathroom.
.
I saw two fucking crazy things when I GOT HOME AFTER THE THREE MINUTE DRIVE FROM TOWN. I looked at the fucking TV. Excuse me for a second while I puke and vape………….I’m back. FUCK!
.
1. FUCKING QUEERS CAN GET MARRIED AND 2. THE MANCHURIAN CANDIDATE SHOWED HIS TRUE FUCKING COLOURS SINGING AMAZING FUCKING GRACE. THE WAR OF THE LEFT HAS BEGUN. OBAMA
WILL MAKE EVERYONE FORFEIT GUNS BECAUSE THE CONFEDERATE FLAG FLIES. FUCK YOU OBAMA YOU MARTIN LUTHER KING WANNA BE FUCKING MUTHERFUCKER. THE BLACKS WILL TAKE OVER YOUR NATION BECAUSE EVERYONE HAS BEEN SENSITIZED SO MUCH NOBODY WILL SHOOT AT THE THUGS. so obama willFUCKING BE THE NEW LEADER OF THE BROTHERS AND TAKE OVER THE FUCKING COUNTRY AFTER HE’S PRESIDENT IF HE EVER FUCKING LEAVES NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THEN HIS DESTINY AS LEADER OF THE NEW WORLD ORDER WILL COME TO PASS BEFORE I FUCKING DIE!!@!@!@@@THIS HAS ALL BEEN A RUSE SINCE SANDY HOOK MY DEAR OLD INTERWHEB FREINDS AND NEIGHBOURS. WHERE ARE THE DEAD BODIES? AREA 51 MY DUDES! THAT IS WEAR THEY STORE THE FEMA COFFINS,…REMEBER?
.
IT’S FUCKING OVER. GRAB YOUR GUNS AND RISE AB0VE THE MATRIX YOU ARE LIVING IN WITH THE CONTRAILS BEING SPRAYED ON YOU AND THE FLUOURIDE IN THE WATER AND CYMBALTA AND SHIT. (DR. BUNSEN AND I REALLY NEED THE SHIT). THOUGH.
.
FUCK YOU LEFT WING MEDIA!!!!!! YOU STARTED ALL THIS FUCKING SHIT!!
.
REVEREND CHAD PROPHESIED THIS WAY BACK. AND HERMIT HAS BEEN ADVISING AS WELL. I’M GOOD CAUSE I’M ALL PREPPED and ready to Bug out.
.
Disbelievers

7:05 pm June, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

^ He says from his rural whitebread ‘hood.

7:08 pm June, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

^ Stoned and ensconced in the warmth of Old Glory wrapped around his thick aging frame and dyed hair. FUCK YOU FATHER TIME.
.
I’MA GO LOAD THE RIFLE NOW THAT THE CLINTON GANG HAS BEEN SPOTTED A FEW SHORT MILES AWAY. FUCK

2:27 am June, 27 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I was about to escape to my bug out shack at Titus Mountain to escape the battle of the planet of the gays and angry blacks, but there’s some boss-dismembering dude running around here and the border is closed.

3:06 pm June, 28 Dickey Fingers said...

Roto Rooter Guy
has reason to celebrate
he unclogged the john.

6:50 pm June, 28 Ed Hardy Har Har said...

Little white thingy
poking out top of his trunks.
It’s not a string, folks!

3:58 pm June, 29 Dickey Fingers said...

Once upon a time
this woman had a future
but then she met Troy

4:48 pm June, 29 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Let’s all hope that his
“prisoner of love” doesn’t get
execution stay.

4:59 pm June, 29 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

These days anyone
can headline in a Brendan
Fraser movie now.

5:18 pm June, 29 Dickey Fingers said...

Broke, smelly and lost
is no way to go through life.
What would Fish Slap do?

10:16 pm June, 29 Ed Hardy Har Har said...

Nigel thoughtfully
brought his “special” brother to
Metallica Night!

4:38 pm July, 2 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

This post has now been up for 10 years and a month or two. Fuck Dark Sock. Quit hoiarding the flagd.

10:47 pm July, 2 Et Tu Douche? said...

@Monsignor Chad,
Happy belated Canadia Day!, How was it?

10:59 pm July, 2 Et Tu Douche? said...

As the 4th Day of July approaches let’s take a trip down memory lane. The wise Hermit shared this with us several years ago.
.
“I watched with disdain this morning, from deep within my hidden position, as they gathered in Small Town America, congregating on the sides of the parade route with their plastic lawn chairs. Dragging patriotic symbols through the mud and hog urine. Family patriarchs carrying coolers full of intestines, Vietnamese yak bladders and fermented vegetation, chilled, to numb the senses.
.
Strike up the band! Seventy-six trombones lead the way blowing taps from behind hidden synthesisers. The standard garbage soon followed and marched with surgically implanted smiles in the somber procession; local County Fair Queens, dressed in drag, leaving discernible trails of artificial estrogen, Motorcycle drill teams with hidden agendas, wearing American Legion hats and bulging pantie-liners, scraping the curbs and glancing off the sides of meat wagons.
.
Vladimir Putin rode shotgun on a deflated Zodiac with a spear gun pointed into the heart of Middle Ämerikä.
.
I ejaculated softly into a hot dog wrapper.”

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