Tuesday, October 10, 2006

HCwD of the Week: The Dung Beetle


Well it was a landslide this week, with this creepy fanged douche taking the cake largely on the strength of the painfully hot hottie he’s tackled with his ‘baggy charms. As L’ Douchebago Venezolano sums it up:

It’s a done deal, HCwD #3: Morning ‘Bag Meditation, aka “The Dung Beetle” takes it all!
I would go down to Mexico, with 500 pesos buy a burro and take it to the hottie’s house in order to see those big mountains of health she carries on her chest in a donkey show. As to the mango-faced, rico-suave @#$@ pie, well, I’d leave him in Mexico with my friend Nachoooo so he would do the flight of the eagle and kill him immediately.

But there was some love thrown at The Earwig and Khan’s Insect. And by “Love” I mean regurgitative spew. Big Bag of Douche sums up the Earwig’s overpowering douchitude:

#1 is clearly a no-brainer. C’mon.. he got the most hair gel and spikiest spikes of the pack.. hair vote. The pink shirt secures a win for douchiest clothing selection. And the bluetooth… that’s the icing on the cake! He’s such a greasy douchebag he even needs a bluetooth to take calls at the bar and pretend they’re important business communications when it’s really mom yelling at him for using up all the AquaNet again.

As PunchingBag waxes poetic in near iambic pentameter:

Senor Dung Beetle
You’re creepy and sick
It’s obvious you paid for this photo op
With this super hot porno chick

Oh little insect of Khan
Fake hairline & hair plugs make me mad
More than that, is the sinful brunette dish
She fills my head with thoughts that are bad

But Earwig, you’re the worst
For you are a head-butting deathgrip douchey
And your scrotey face that says:
“This little beauty belongs to ME”

PunchingBag

Count Douchula tackles Khan’s Insect:

That smug look and the point to the camera just scream “I am king @#$@.” It makes me want to destroy the Earth. This hottie makes me very happy in the pants. She’s got this look on her face that says “I’m drunk and ready to @#$@,” which is A OK with me. And the way that she is just grinding on that piece of @#$@’s crotch just proves that God is a malicious bastard who thinks it’s fun to torture the people that he created.

(Sorry C.D., as much as I love the epithets, this is a family site and I gotta think of the kiddies)

So lets raise Dung Beetle to the rafters. We’ll see him again for another uber-scrote smackdown when we do the HCwD of the Month contest in a few weeks. We’ll see how well his douchitude holds up on the rage-o-meter then.

# posted by douchebag1

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