Friday, December 22, 2006

Santa 'Bagging


With Christmas rapidly approaching, I thought I would share a heartwarming tale of attempted douchebaggery brought to us by our very own Douchestar Runner, who put on the Santa outfit as his means of engaging a stage-1 ‘bag strategy to meet the hotties. Gotta give him points for originality. Not too many ‘bags running around using the highly unusual “Santa Strategy.” Especially Presbyterian Ministers on the make.

As DR recounts the tale:

Friday night my roommate and I have his brother and our mutual friend from high school over at our place for good old boozing. My roomie’s bro arrives carrying two Santa costumes because he and his brother are going to an event called “SantaCon” (which is held in Manhattan every year) the next morning. It’s an all day affair where several hundred Santas roam all over Manhattan getting drunk and causing all kinds of debauchery. My buddy from high school–who happens to be a Presbyterian minister–shows up, and with very little convincing he and roomie’s bro start getting into the Santa suits because we are going to hit the local bar. My roommate and I tell them–“c’mon, Santa ALWAYS gets laid!”

So we put the two Santas in the backseat of my huge ’62 Pontiac and we drive down to the bar and park right in front in order to cause the biggest scene. We aren’t in the bar for 2 minutes when these chicks come over to have their pictures taken with the Santas.

And there you have it. Trouble is–wouldn’t ya know it–these chicks were with some total douchebags, complete with elbow tats and cigs behind the ears, who were NOT enjoying all the attention we were getting in the bar. Unfortunately I didn’t get any pics of them–we were probably very close to a fight just by being in there.

–DR

Nice try, DR. Santa’Bagging is only a stage-1 ‘bag strategy. Looks like tribal tats, gel and bling beat a Santa suit any day of the week.

# posted by douchebag1

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