Tuesday, January 30, 2007

The Anus Pucker

You know, I was feeling good this morning. Had a bowl of Lucky Charms. Topped it off with a can of PBR. I even found a pair of matching socks in the closet. It was gonna be a good day.

I took a look at this lovely smile, and giant rays of sunshine promised me idyllic tomorrows.

And then I observed the giant greasy ball of douche growing out of her right shoulder, and I felt the classic anus-pucker of a true HCwD pic. It was wrong. So very, very wrong.

It’s not just the Jesus Bling, nor the chin pubes, nor even the Flowbee haircut. It’s the low cut v-neck t-shirt + sportscoat look. No, it’s the ‘bag headbutt. No, it’s the douche-face.

No, it’s all of the above. This lost circus clown needs Mr. T to pity his fool. I’d blender his nads then play pachinko with this swan until our boba ran out.

Also, your humble narrator, The DB1 (that’s me!), is scheduled to be interviewed by phone on all things hottie/douchey Wednesday morning (tomorrow), on the British talkshow Kerrang!. So if you’re in England tomorrow morning, around 6-7am, give us a listen, guvnah. It’ll actually be airing tonight around 11pm P.S.T. live, due to the time difference.

Website is http://www.kerrangradio.co.uk/

# posted by douchebag1

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