DoucheSport
Three will enter.
Only one will douche supreme.
This is not a contest for HCwD hottie/douchey comingling. This is a scrote face-off smackdown ‘bag attack of international world shaking consequences. This is a battle of scrote that will shake the very foundations of heaven and earth in its unholy faceoffs. This is it, folks.
DoucheSport.
Each douche fighter has strengths and weaknesses. Each douche fighter will bring his A-Game to this octagon ring smackdown no holds barred douche off supreme. With cheese.
Inspired by the discussion in the comments thread, this is a no holds barred three round Ultimate Douching Championship. Hotties to the side. In this smackdown it is douche-on-douche only.
Enter Donkey Douche.
Greased up and ready to smackdown with the full barrel throwing force of an early 80s videogame icon.
D.D. is ready to rumble. No dog-tags. Only facial grease and the game-face on.
Do not mess with the D.D. He came here to claim the Ultimate Douching Championship, and he will not be denied.
But what’s that?….
Who’s entering the ring next??…
Why…
It’s…
Dracadouche, aka Lurkascrote, aka Bat Boy.
Bat Boy doesn’t have the brute force strength of the frontal assault on the senses that Donkey Douche presents, but his stealth movements and quick strike capabilities make him a formidable foe.
Often known to dart around his prey with the speed of a feral rat and the energy of a cracked up White Chocolate, Bat Boy brings a covert douche-attack that overwhelms anyone caught looking the other way (like this poor doomed hottie here).
Bat Boy enters the Octogon ready to douche-off with dexterity, speed and quickness. He is a dangerous foe. D.D. looks nervous.
But wait!…
Who’s that coming to join the party?
Why, it’s…
Old No. 7 aka Cro ‘Bagnon!
Out of retirement and ready to defend the crown, Cro ‘Bagnon looks filled with the power of the source-douche that is his to summon at will.
Bat Boy and Donkey Douche look nervous, folks. This will be their toughest contest yet.
Cro ‘Bagnon lets off a greasy roar that gets the crowd excited. This will be a test of ‘bag hand gestures, creepy clothing items, and of course the most powerful weapon of all… the douche-face.
Cro ‘Bagnon loooks pumped, folks. He is not to be trifled with.
Referreeing tonight’s DoucheSport Ultimate Douche Championship will be none other than…
Douche Lee!!!
And the crowd goes wild as D.L., decked out in a fantastic sports jersey with multiple ‘bling hanging from his tiny neck, makes his way through the crowd and enters the Octagon.
Douche Lee is reknowned in DoucheSport contests for his zen scrote state, his ability to manifest at will in the presence of hotties, and, famously, for his fantastic ‘bag haircut. Star of the famous film, “Enter the ‘Baggon,” the D.L. knows a thing or two about ‘bag smackdowns and will be the perfect judge for this contest.
Douche Lee will ring the bell and get things started…
AND IT’S ON!!!
Who will win?…
That’s up to you, folks.
Let me know the play-by-play in the comments thread.
