Monday, March 12, 2007

Smashing Pumpkinhead

And while you’re stewing over the pile of pud presented for your parsing, here’s what may or may not be the hottest Russian defector since Vanessa Angel in Spies Like Us. She is triple shot vodka goodness. And posing with a smirky, lip fungus who may or may not be Scott Weiland’s illegitimate son. There’s a cold war in my pants.

Megods, I’d Marx her Engels. I’d defect her pravda. She warms my Tolstoy with an extra order of bratwurst.

What, so bratwurst isn’t from Russia. Sue me. It’s not like “She warms my Tolstoy with an extra order of Blini” has quite the same ring.

As to Smashing Pumpkinhead, it’s rare that a head forms an off kilter octagon without causing permanent brain damage. It is positively Piscopoian in its freakish oddness. It makes me itch. Make it go away.

# posted by douchebag1

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