Wednesday, June 6, 2007

HCwDB of the Week: ChandlerBag and the Bumper


Last week was a great week for asses. It also featured some hotties with lovely butts. Yeah, that joke may be vaudeville, but it still works.

ChandlerBag’s Bumper Hottie features the greatest caboose since “The Little Engine that Could” and one of the best ever on the site. I turn it over to the erudite Vinny Scumbaglia to sum it up:

The mighty greasy forehead of Chandlerdouche is a work indeed, and he presents the Mussolini of doucheposturing. His will o’the wisp hair and semi-attempt at some kind of hand gesture are doubly laughable (‘uhh, representing, er… up thatway! yeh, that’s it…”) and the previously noted observation that Bumper must stoop to embrace this scrotewonder seals the package. Were that she were in my hands, the small of her back would bear the texture of that rough stone pillar, and her wan grin instead a gasp of pleasure.

Heh, the Mussolini of doucheposturing. Nicely done, V.S. However, david douchecovney makes a very strong case for The Balcony Bag:

Gotta go with Balc-bag for one very simple reason; football pants..

Hard to debate the uberdouchuousness of the low riding football pants. It didn’t seem Friday Night Blights bothered as many people as it bothered me. Although Voudouche Chile (slight return) picked up on the wrong:

I have to go Blights, vox populi be damned. They’ve achieved what Phil Spector called the Wall of Choad–throw in a string section and they’re going straight to number 1. HC literally has an hourglass figure–you could turn her upside down and use her as a Boggle timer. Replace could with should.

Nicely working in a Phil Spector reference. Lets hope he didn’t take a shotgun to the dark haired cutie after the pic was taken.

But since I’m still hung over from last night’s ride on the 5:01 ‘Train, I’ll simply turn it over to the ubiquitous anonymous for the final word:

Chandlerbag earns my vote for the forehead shine that is shaped like a cartoon penis.

Indeed. Book that caboose a ticket in the Monthly.

# posted by douchebag1

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