Friday, July 13, 2007

Buble Lips

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Recently I’ve become convinced that Michael Buble’s lips are one of the markers of the impending global apocalypse. It all happened one night when I dared to wander into the E! basic cable wastelands. There was this singer I’ve never heard of being interviewed. Even his name suggested Beelzebubic nature. The Buble. The Lips of Satanic Rue.

Suddenly I realized. The lips were a creature that had taken over Buble’s face. Perhaps alien in origin. Certainly mutant.

It was a moment of clarity. The invasion had begun.

Like the number 23, I see Buble Lips lurking behind corners waiting to destroy civilization itself. Tearing at the fabric of the universe with scrotey spew. Threatening our fragile sanity with the consumptive powers of lip smacking douchebag primal horror.

Okay, maybe I hurl invective at the Buble Lips with a tad too much hyperbole. But they do creep me out. Spying them reappear on this douchey choadbag suggests my initial concerns of mutant spread were not entirely unfounded.

Doe Eyed Fawn has that wonderful glazed doughnut stare. And is there anything more promising than the hint of low IQ + fantastic boobies? And yet Buble Lips remains, tasking my soul with fears of psychological cheese melt.

# posted by douchebag1

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