Wednesday, November 21, 2007

HCwDB of the Month: The Limey


In this glorious smackdown between classic douche and the absurd spectacle of a Euro-wreck, it was a race to the finish. But the sheer power of accessory, as well as the hott, helped The Limey to overpower The Batbag and take the comic book crown.

As swami ‘bagavad gita medidates on The Lime:

When I first saw the Limey, I felt like Arjuna after Krisna revealed himself: glorious, yet terrified. He has bestowed upon us the visage of the ultimate choad: the ‘Bagavan. “The Limey is Time; He is the Destroyer of Worlds.” How could he not be DB of the month?

Indeed, Swami. Sir Douche-a-Lot the Third agrees:

Couple said extreme ‘Baggerdom with such tightly snugged slugs that they resemble ole’ Chin ‘Bag’s chin. Oh no. my mind is possessed with ‘Bagger to the point that I no longer enjoy fresh cleavite without recurring images of God’s mistakes.

That’s the key to this pic. The cleavite. The glove. The chin pubes. The blank, vacant, lobotomized look of too many hours of basic cable and downloaded porn. It is douche-hell personified.

talayatu makes the case for a ‘Bag Soda and Lime:

Limey’s hott is superior, even with that awful frontal lobe hair bump thing guidettes often have nowadays. The shocker, the one glove, the bling, and especially the dang soul patch, but also the fact I don’t want to look at Scrotington that often… it’s gotta be Limey.

And burnsy agrees:

The Limey’s racing stripe makes me want to eat a baby.

In an irrational world, the only rational choice is irrationality. Well said, burnsey.

However the Batbag fans had their KAPOWS to say about the lurid spectacle of superdouche in the age of mechanical reproduction. bernard mcshaughnessy lays the smackdown for the Batbag:

It is like someone took a lump of douche and molded it into a doughy douche-package, then s@#t on it, wiped his/her ass with a comic book, crammed the feces-smeared pages into the lump of douche, popped a silk shirt on it, threw it into a night club and then ran for the state line, ass on fire.

Yup. Pretty much sums it up. Beautiful smackdown B McS.

Long-time friend of the site and supreme ‘bag hunter baron von douchehausen throws some spew Jack Scrotington’s way:

I got to go with Jack on this one. When you are an aging ‘bag with a receding hairline and you pay to have your scraggly dirty blonde locks braided up to look like an imported overpaid soccer player, well, you deserve a shot at the annual.

Well said, BvD. But it’s the everpresent anonymous who makes perhaps the clearest case why The Limey deserves to win:

Of the four candidates the Limey contains both the girl I would most like to lick and the douche I would most like to see trash compacted.

And that’s what we’re all about here at HCwDB. On Turkey’s Eve, we must remember to contemplate the hott as well as the choad. Like turkey with gravy. Or poo with flowers.

The Batbag, we’ll see again. Oh yes. We’ll see him again.

But today, the classic Hott/Scrote combo of The Limey is our Monthly Winner.

# posted by douchebag1

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