Friday, February 29, 2008

Ask DB1: Hott Speak


Private School Hott writes in:

—-
Dear Douchebag1:

Thanks for the site. I’m hoping you’ll give a minor clarification: are your comments demeaning the hotts as Future Hairdressers of America actually a form of self-parody?

Are you trying to act douchescrotey, like in your picture (I’m assuming it’s you, and if it is, you look douche-liciously hot). Or are you an accidental d-bag? Douches in glass houses shouldn’t throw ice er whatever.

-A hott/ fellow graduate of an expensive private school.
—-

I’ve read this email six times and have no idea what it’s asking me. Perhaps someone else can expain it.

However, if Private School Hott has nice inner thighs, I will forgive the incoherence and buy her a number of cocktails while listening to her complain about how, like, her best friend Kimmy is, like, totally a bitch. For hours. While nodding appreciatively.

Yes, Private School Hott. Kimmy is, like, totally a bitch.

Because I’d listen to you read the phone book in Gaelic if there’s an off chance the night will end with my powdering your butt cheeks with talcum powder while singing songs of Algerian revolution.

# posted by douchebag1

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