Monday, July 21, 2008

1994 Mugs an Alba


I love you, blonde, perfectly formed Alba carbon copy genetic reproduction.

I would learn to chant rhythmically in Spanish just so I could charm the housekeeper into letting me come in and hump your teddy bear while you’re out buying groceries at Mayfair Market.

I would spend years slavishly painting great works of art using only acrylic paint, small lumps of coal and pieces of broken glass, just so you would ignore my paintings as you strolled through a museum whilst texting on your iphone.

You inspire me to take showers thrice daily in the hopes that one particle of the shower water might someday reach the ocean while you’re bodysurfing with your personal trainer, Karl, and find its way under your taught, yet oh so firm, spandex bikini. At which point my particle of shower water would shout “Booya!!”

Which is very odd. Because shower water doesn’t usually talk.

Oh, and 1994 is a douche. Because… uhm… because he just is.

# posted by douchebag1

Leave a Reply

What is 2 + 3 ?
Please leave these two fields as-is:
IMPORTANT! To be able to proceed, you need to solve the following simple math (so we know that you are a human) :-)