Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Reader Mail: Tagging Mystery


Reader Shia Ladouche tags the biggest ‘bag of them all:

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DB1-

I was in Vegas recently, and boy, have I got a bag tag for you. You can’t really tell how hot this chick was (trust that she was the hottie boobie suckle-thigh), but the fact remains that this is true douchebaggery in action.

The ‘bag is the legendary Arch-Douche “Mystery”, actually performing a “magic” trick in a ridiculous fluffy hat in hopes of wooing the lovely blonde hott. This bag tag takes place at the center bar in the Hard Rock cafe.

The funny thing is, when I took this pic, I didn’t even know who Mystery was. I showed the pic to a friend when I got back home and she revealed his identity. I just thought it was the biggest douche I’d ever met! Little did I know it was none other than the Grandmaster ‘Bag himself, leader of the army of pathetic oompa-loompas following his 4 scrotal truths. Imagine my surprise.

Keep on mocking the douche and lusting the hott,
– Shia Ladouche

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Mystery’s fundamental philosophical flaw is in assuming capturing the boobie hottie suckle thigh validates all. The hott does not validate the self. One can achieve a hott without douchal plummet. That is the the triumph over The ‘Bag Within.

Excellent work, S.L. This is one of the highest ‘bag tags possible. It’s like knocking out Mike Tyson in Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out.

# posted by douchebag1

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