Wednesday, July 16, 2008

The Boobie Epiphany


Lil’ Head’s Epiphany (a one-act):

Lil’ Head: Boobies!!

Big Head: Lil’ Head, we’ve talked about this repeatedly. Those large soft fleshmounds will only lead us into trouble.

Lil’ Head: How do you figure?

Big Head: First we have to convince her to ditch the cactus head. Then spend two hours at the cabana while she Woos with her six annoying Woo-Hott friends from Michigan State. Then she’ll borrow our credit card and disappear for four hours.

Lil’ Head: And your point is? I reiterate: boobies.

Big Head: Look lil’ head, it’s important that you learn context. Place the boobies into a larger framework.

Lil’ Head: By framework, you mean the butt cheeks and the holy hooha.

Big Head: The holy hooha is not what I’m talking about.

Lil’ Head: Well you should be. I’ll bet it’s where angels fear to tread, afraid to sully its perfection.

Big Head: No, but that’s very poetic, Lil’ Head.

Lil’ Head: Thank you. I’m feeling poetic today. And by poetic, I mean inspired by boobies!!

Big Head: Alls I want you to realize, Lil’ H, is that boobies alone are not enough to convince us to spend six hours on a fruitless quest, only to be left at the bar when another zebra-striped douchescrote walks by.

Lil’ Head: Hmm.

Big Head: Think of it this way, Lil’ Head. Pursuing the Bleeth Hott means boobies that are always out of reach. And boobies out of reach are not boobies at all.

Lil’ Head: So you’re saying if we chase the Boobies we cannot grab, then we lose the potential to locate another set of Boobies that we CAN grab.

Big Head: Exactly!

Lil’ Head: I will have to sleep on that. But first… Boobies!

Big Head: (sigh)

and… scene.

# posted by douchebag1

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