Monday, September 8, 2008

HCwDB of the Week

Last week I was tense with anticipation over the impending release of Beverly Hills Chihuahua. I can safely report that it was everything I hoped it would be. And everything I dreamed it would offer.

Here’s your finalists:

HCwDB of the Week Finalist #1: Megahead

Megahead brings the laugh factor, and an unusually high quality (if stage-3 Bleethed) hott. But is he a threat?

Judging by the eye makeup, Megahead may bat for the home team, which tends to be a disqualifier for HCwDB toxicity. But it’s hard to say.

The cuddle, the fwippy hair, the hint of chin fung, and the Megahead head, all earn a spot in the Weekly.

Okay, lets face it.

The dude just cracks me the hell up.

I probably shouldn’t go with this pic over some of the ones that just missed the cut, but never underestimate the laugh factor in a HCwDB coupling.

And she is a caramel corn summer fair sweet.

HCwDB of the Week Finalist #2: X-Lax

We haven’t had a truly legendary breakout doucherstar appearing in a number of pics since probably Bra!! a few months back.

X-Lax could be that scrotewank.

Rocking consistent douchery in the presence of hotts across a number of pics, including a delightful Asian belly hott, a strangely Da Vincian sorority party, and a hidden turd float, X-Lax has shown longevity in his douchal career.

And with a wide collection of sorority girls on his arm, the hottie/douchey factor is high. But orange enough to take the Weekly?

HCwDB of the Week Finalist #3: Corey Hamster

For classic Tuscan European scrotifery, for holding a delightful hott in his furry little wheel running paws, and for rallying the base when I needed to bring the votes in, The Hamster gets the coveted third and final spot on the ticket.

Some may argue the Hamster is lesserbag.

I give you the white Dog Tag / Jesus Bling combo. The giant collar. The hamster whiskers. The Dick Tracy watch. And, of course, the douche-face.

And like every pure hottie/douchey dialectic, the swan of hope. Slap some librarian glasses on her, and I would definitely marry her in a stormy shotgun wedding, then weep quietly in the bathroom when she cheated on me with the gas station attendant, Antonio.

As with any Weekly after a Monthly, a number of worthy finalists just missed the cut, including The Cheeks, Tatty McTatterson and the luscious mounds of Melon Butt. Even Pedro lacked that certain extra quality to make the Finals.

We can only have three, and them three’s your Francis Bacon inspired triptych. Which will rise to become HCwDB of the Week? That, fellow ‘bag hunters, is up to you.

Vote, as always, in the comments thread.

# posted by douchebag1

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