Thursday, October 23, 2008

Ask DB1: The Douche-Hott Singularity


Julia writes in:

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Douchebag1-

Some of the douches on your site actually don’t look that bad. I actually think many of them look similar to the girls with the bodys/tan/frosts/teeth.

Couldn’t it be said, that the “hot chicks” typify the lady douche, and if that were the case, isn’t the douche just meeting his equal? I think the pic you chose for your book cover, features two people of equal hotness and douchery. Was this your intention?
– Julia

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What you’re referring to Julia is the act of “Bleething,” in which Douche and Hott come together and the scrotal infection taints both. They become a singularity of fester.

Again it must be noted that all men, myself included, have been douche in service of the hott. Just as the Croatian Lungfish learns to swim intricate patterns to attract female Lungfish, so do we carve our hair and grease our foreheads to gain suckle thigh.

My mission quest is to save the hott by changing the culture. By rearranging the semiotics of discourse into a new alignment in which douchery is no longer necessary.

Then, and only then, will the boobies be free.

# posted by douchebag1

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