Friday, May 29, 2009

Friday Thoughts and Links


While the spectacle of the uberscrote will always deserve mock, let us not forget the passive “everybag” taint as we meditate and ruminate on this Friday afternoon.

These are the real Grieco Virus carriers of our time. Not just the mohawked DJ entertainers who get paid by the pud. The everyday wankstars. The average scroads who grab hott and sneer. For it is they who smell like monkey feces.

Here are your Friday links:

Congrats to Hall of Scrote legend Velveeta ‘Bag for breaking into the big time with his upcoming role in the remake of Land of the Lost.

If fairytales featured douchebags, the results may have been different.

Watch the boobies bounce. Choose your cup size and you’re off to the races.

Noted football uberscrote Jeremy Shockey visits Douche Mecca, passes out.

In basketball, the greasy “Birdman” in Denver infects his fans with the scrote virus. And speaking of the Denver Nuggets, why does their logo resemble the fascist symbol in Pink Floyd’s “The Wall”?

And moving over to baseball, George Brett is a Wonderful Storyteller. Who’s the pitchers in this game?

Hot Chicks with Stormtroopers.

Rural trashbag robs local Wal-Mart for twelve dollars worth of Axe Bodyspray. Busted for drugs, carrying a hand gun and “a 12-ounce bottle of Axe shower gel, according to police.” Of course.

Speaking of Axe, Southhampton Gets the Axe. It’s stories like that that make me feel like we’re losing the war.

And, for all of your waiting, here’s your Friday Ass Pear. It’s like a warm, glazed, Thanksgiving ham.

Go forth and celebrate, ‘bag hunters, huntresses and assorted boobie hotties. Your week was productive. And alcohol awaits.

# posted by douchebag1

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