Friday, September 4, 2009

Friday Thoughts and Links


It’s Friday, and your humble, half-drunk and vaguely incoherent narrator on all things hottie/douchey is in the city of San Francisco.

Where Donald Sutherland stopped the new age aliens. Where Harry Callahan’s cultural id monster tortured punks. Where George Lucas spent a few years in the early 70s pretending to be social.

Where the pinnacle of MTV’s The Real World was shot. Where hipsterbag dot-commers went boom and bust a decade ago. Where’s Mrs. O’Leary’s cow had a, well, a cow.

Where the Beats came before the Hippies. Where Naked Lunch was read next to the Mitchell Brothers filming the first porn and R. Crumb drew some zaftig ass pear birthed from deep within his fervered psyche.

And now me. Scratching myself. Sipping an Orange Whip. Lusting after the boobie hottie suckle thigh and thinking of new ways to mock the douchescrote.

Orange Whip? Orange Whip? Three Orange Whips.

Here’s your links:

Confessions of a Dangerous Guido. A legend in the making.

Retro douchebaggery: Mickey Rourke in Wild Orchid O.D.B. Rourke was a central figure in the initial wave of ballsweat that swamped the ladies in the late 1980s.

Mila Kunis and Natalie Portman to diddle on film. Mmmm… Semitic sapphic sexy scumptuousness.

The Gator wins an award, dresses like a douchey David Bowie.

Since he lost the Monthly, Schmuckhead’s Claudina Ass Pear and Friends have abandoned him.

Ed Hardy USB Ports. For when you need 8 gigs of douchebaggery freed up on your hard drive.

Future reality TV footnote Jon Gosselin scrotes it up at a Vegas Pool Party.

The Economist magazine gets all sciencey in its study of douchonomics. Or you could’ve just linked to my site, Economist writers. And nice job predicting the 2008 meltdown.

Best HCwDB prank of the year.

And finally, here’s your sandy ass pear. Real or not, I love her. Or if you prefer the real thing, here’s some Assian Pear.

For it’s almost the end of summer. And we must reflect.

# posted by douchebag1

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