Saturday, November 21, 2009
HCwDB on Second Life
This is a real image from “Second Life,” in which douches can now create tatted up, uber-pumped online alter-egos.
With bling. And Douchebaguette on arm. And underwear poke. And six pound watch.
I suppose when the human body emulates the hyper-spectacle of the brand-name billboard, it’s only a matter of time before the avatars follow.
A virtual echo of a corporeal echo of a virtual spectacle.
…and suddenly cyberterrorism makes COMPLETE sense.
First!!!
I mean second.
Drats. Foiled again.
When douche invades not only a scrotes first life but his "Second Life" all is lost.
Xenu weeps……..
Second life. When your real life has no meaning.
This game helps them practice new douche innovations in the safety of their own trailer.
I think I will buy it and go on a virtual douche rampage.
I'd 1080p in her butt.
do their avatars have roid shriveled balls too?
I await new douchey rebuttals:
"SEE? U H8RZ GOT NOOOOO LIFES N I GOT 2 NOW HAHAHA LOL OMG MAYBE U SHULD GET OUTA DA BASEMENT AN GET JACKED LIKE BOTH ME'S LOLOL"
Sorry, that should read:
"C U H8RZ….."
Stupid punctuation and full words.
It looks really cool. I can't wait to play it.
Does anyone have the cheat codes yet?
There are several books on Amazon.
Second Life for Dummies helped me the most. I enjoy the game now more than ever.
C NERDZ DIS PROOF U IN UR MOMS BASEMENT TRYIN B LIKE US IN VIRTUAL REALITY
All of my online friends enjoy this game.
Skank in the middle is a professional carpet-chewer…
Avatar is going to be a lame, lame movie…
The left douches bling looks like its a virtual iphone
Avatar is going to be so cool. James Cameron is directing it. All of his movies a cool, like Titanic.
Although the horror of this kind of spectacle appearing in Second Life is painful to behold, it does lend furtherance to a dream of mine.
A First Person Shooter video game, that I'm sure you'd all play.
"Douchebag Hunter".
Think about it.
Let me see if I understand this. You pay real money to create a virtual you so you can then go to the virtual club and pay for a virtual drink. And then pretend to get laid by a virtual babe who is really the avatar of a middle aged fat guy from Indiana?
Is that it?
My Mom says she needs the computer now. So I have to go. Chatting about second life is almost as fun as playing it. Try it guys.
@Wheezer
I do believe I ruptured my spleen laughing.
"1080P in her butt" FTW…
Are there horses in Second Life?
Just askin…
Sadly, douches don't realize that two times zero is still zero.
To: Bob
Re: Douchebag Hunter
I like it.
This may not be illegal, but it is toally BOGUS. 🙁
MR White wrote:
Sadly, douches don't realize that two times zero is still zero.
but if douches are less than nothing (an actual suck and drain on the universe), then that makes them a negative, and a negative times a positive is a negative, so a negative times zero makes it negative zero, which is less than nothing.
I think.
so are tattoos trendy now?
Someone please tell me that this is a leaked still from Manhunt 3. 'Cause I've got a plastic bag and I ain't afraid to use it.
Cyber-douche…..a sign of the apocalypse!!
Fantastic. Now if they'd live out their lives only in that environment we'd all be happy.
I've always wondered when Second Life would get a mention on here.
'Baggery is practically the default "look" in SL, and I don't think it's necessarily RL (real-life) douchebags who are creating these abominations.
I've got two avatars on Second Life, one male and one female, and it is VERY difficult to find clothes that don't make them look like a thug or a slut, respectively. Part of the problem is a technical one — most of the clothes are quite literally "painted on." But most of it is just plain old bad taste on the designers' part.
The overly tatted douchebag/uette look is the style on Second Life. Clothing makers would make normal clothes if there was demand for it, but it seems that most people want to be virtual sluts and douchebags. "Ugly is the new pretty," indeed.
In most cases, if a guy doesn't look like a thug, he's so metro that you have to question his sexual orientation. It is sad, but some of the nicest guys I know in there wear skins with guyliner.
Guess there's a little douche in all of us.
those of us from the 4chan online subculture saw this coming 10 light years away when the IMVU browser ads started popping up.
and back then, Kill Bill motifs were popular in IMVU ads. just for daring to use the Kill Bill movies in such despicable ways, the owner(s) and staff of IMVU should spend an eternity bathing in molten tungsten.
My second life personality is "Tina," a fourteen year old schoolgirl who likes Miley Cyrus, Unicorns and texting constantly to my BFF Amber.
Or, is that my first life?
Clearly a work of Satan. If you take a look at the douchebag on the far left, there is clearly an upside down cross on his chest. Hermanos Rodriguez do not approve of Satan.
As a user of this game, I can tell you these puds are rampant, crawling over the land like so many spider crabs.
I and my comrades have made it our personal duty to destroy them, emotionally and physically, whenever they approach us.
Wait…..this isn't another photo of the Canted Angle post below?
I'm going into the other room to set my cockk on fyre after I'm done slamming it shut 52 tymes in my laptop jagr; jewf jFE J FADS JFSDAPF AKJFSE IOJ[ JOADSFJO ADSFS LKM;A JIOA[ OIA[O AG[ GAO[ OMASF[ OMGF[MO ADSG FSDA[M [GD[ FSDMAP ;
I would buy a copy of Second Life if there were the option to roam the world as Halo's Master Chief with a fully loaded battle rifle.
THAT'S entertainment…
@ Wheezer 4:35–BWAAAHAHAHAAAAAAA
@ Capt BD 8:30–You read my mind.
Although the one on the far left is a little hairy for a DB, eh? Maybe he's an agent. Either way, I'm amazed that we're all told to "get a life" by people who play these sorts of games. Hm. Apparently game programming geeks have been infected as well, as this is the only choice of appearance for your character? No Star Trek uniforms? Feh. I want no part of it.
@Darksock
You mean the option of flashmobbing someone as the leader of a group of flying penises doesn't do it for you?
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2006/12/20/sadville_flyers/
You know I think that being attacked by an excitable swarm of jelly dongs might almost be as effective as that battle rifle for dealing with your average 'bag. And if not then we just need to wait until they get those full body sensation suits on the market. "Oh god it is in my ear!"
I'm not familiar with Second Life. Is it anything like Grand Theft Autoerotic Asphyxiation?
or is it more like Call of Doody?
"Fail-o"
So lemme guess from L to R:
47 year old Burger King Manager with 3 kids, a Yugo, and an upside down mortgage.
38 year old mother of 4, works at Staples fucking up the printing department, drives an '83 Chevy Caprice Classic, weighs 305 lbs.
14 year old boy who is questioning his sexual identity, prefers to be called Kayla around the house, has Pocket Rocket under "his" pillow.
Chris Hansen
Smoot (wants to know how to get douchier)
I don't need real money to figure out how to make a denial of service attack against the server.
@medusa
No trek uniforms in second life, but I'm sure all of us would chip in to buy you one of these.
Provided you send pics, natch.
@ Scroteophobic
I'm in
In the techno world of Simms the 'Douchebag-Hott' comingaling is alive and well but with a startling devolopement. It would appear that the nauseating taint of 'Douche Tatt' is crossing the gender divide.
Two choad wanks of scrotal proportions balze the way in cyber-douche, the stench of Axe and the ooze of gel seep from my humble note book.
Three 'Semi Hotts' miss the boat completely with their assortment of tatts and toolbag beltbuckels..attaining the dubious accolade of Cyber Douche Ho's. An unfortunate tag but nessessary if we are to prevent such train wrecks from making it to our reality.
Regards,
Douche Pitt
Overheard at a local coffee vendor, "I'm not a douchebag. I just play one on Second Life!"
Anybody find it funny that dbs shave there whole bodies in real life but have very hairy chest in second life??? weird…
@ Capt BD 5:15
BRING IT.
Hate to break it to everyone, but you could also Create-A-Douche(tm) in Saints Row 2, accessorize said douche with bling and whatnot, and throw a gang sign for good measure. Although, considering that your character is supposed to be an actual gang member, and not a suburban choadwank w/ tattoos, that might create a NotADouche vote by default…….
Reminds me of an old LP I had back in college, Second Wind for Organ (pipe organ).
Therein lies your cheat sheet.