Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Where the Wild Things Aren’t


So this dead tree forest is where childhood imagination goes to die.

Yes, fellow ‘bag hunters. That’s facial stubble shaved into semi chin-strap.

While glorious Gloria smiles for the camera and wonders if her ex is still single.

# posted by douchebag1
11:41 pm November, 24 Anonymous said...

First!

11:43 pm November, 24 The Desert Douchehunter said...

I guess as long as you did paint Gloria's house, you do get to rub up against her for a minute.

At least until the restraining order comes through.

11:48 pm November, 24 UFO Destroyers said...

She's paying enough attention to this suitor by texting her ex to come over and spray some more DDT to finish defoliating the scrub brush. Or napalm works when there's a tight budget.

11:50 pm November, 24 UFO Destroyers said...

Dude made his t-shirt during art class day at the group home. Or, as we like to say, DeVry's Art-403 Advanced Crayola class.

11:51 pm November, 24 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Gloria knew better than to spook Joey. She remembered from her "Introduction to Child Psychology" class that this behavior is normal for retarded children under the age of 5. And short bus douches.

12:23 am November, 25 Vin Douchal said...

Merton's mouth still would not open after the bully dared him to eat the entire 144 oz. Elmers Glue in Remedial Art class

12:26 am November, 25 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Put a little spinner on top of his hat and The Man in Yellow will come to take him away and put him in his cage.

1:18 am November, 25 scrotum pole said...

I can't see the forest for the twigs.

(and yellow-shirted douchebag)

2:26 am November, 25 pv1 said...

That wall reminds me of Veronica…

2:36 am November, 25 Troy Tempest said...

This is an oddly compelling image.

It's got the soft focus thing going, the vignette corners, the tree branches adding "nature" to this unholy portrait from hell.

And in the middle? A very sweet looking blonde offering us her Blackberry, and a bucket of yellow scrotewank, gurgling with the idiocy and arrogance that only a douchenozzle like this turdburgler can manage.

this could be a contender for the Gugenheim award along with the vegas apocalyse

I collect images from this site that I think are interesting.

It's a pity the porn star from Brooke and Douchebag calleda take down – that shot would have been a shoo-in for Guggenheim award – bleeth, douche, pitbull and megasized truck in front of a McMansion? Perfect.

I would also submit The Incredible Yolk for the guggenheim award.

And Lithuania is a good contender as well.

And last but not least, there is something to be said for the idiocy and ambiguity of Lake Havapoo.

I took Lake Havapoo and edited the boat and shopped the volleyball pole out and it became a very bizarre photo…

4:49 am November, 25 Whoop-di-douche said...

Ah, so Where the Wild Things Aren't just happens to be where Big Bird is. Big YELLOW BIRD.

And I'd sesame her street and toss more into her cleavite.

4:51 am November, 25 DarkSock said...

Sure, it's fun to frolic amongst the forest-like pubes of Plinky's Mom's ass hairs….until you get lost….and hear the rumbling noises….

5:12 am November, 25 Whoop-di-douche said...

Thanks, DarkSock, I thought that was Gene Autry's Tumbling Tumbleweeds for a moment. I stand mentally corrected.

7:04 am November, 25 Anonymous said...

Jenna Elfman Hott is smiling because all she has to do is press "send" to put out a hit on Stubble Strap Scrote. Then the dead tree forest will come alive again and all will be less douchey in the world.

10:04 am November, 25 Steve L. said...

the Blair Douche Project got off to a solid start, i see.

by the by, Gloria's ex might also be a douchebag. just saying.

1:52 pm November, 25 pv1 said...

Only 16 comments?

2:51 pm November, 25 Anonymous said...

The rest of the picture requested to be blurred out, on account of not wanting to be seen with this hot mess.

-Bagnonymous

3:04 pm November, 25 Bob said...

This douche's face is extra-slappable.

6:09 pm November, 25 Anonymous said...

Where the hell is the Blair Witch when you need her? He should be standing in the corner waiting his turn

7:23 pm November, 25 BillDouchiest the Wild Swine said...

Is this some kind of "$8.95 Photography Studio" where you'd normally have the Stepford pictures of the family taken? What's with the twigs in the background?

What's with the bright, shiny yellow douchebag in the foreground?

I can see it now. Fifteen years from now, when they're having another family portrait done. The only difference will be the addition of five boys, each with fauxhawks and Ed Hardy for Kids wear… and 50% more of Gloria to love.

9:39 pm November, 25 Anonymous said...

Flashback dream sequence douche makes me woozy.

The smirky not-quite-kissy lips and the label on the lens of his shades make me want to bite the head off of a fluffy bunny.

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