Friday, December 18, 2009

Hottest Hotts of the Year: Rachelle and Clarissa

I was gonna do a two-hott sapphic faceoff, but ran out of time on the calendar as the 2009 Douchies wind down. So we’re going with a co-award. Two winning Hotts of the Year.

Although if you’d like to vote your preference, we can do an informal vote in the thread.

Hottest Hott of the Year #1: Waxy McBrow’s Rachelle

Barely beating out Josephine in a four boob race, Rachelle’s curves snuck in and stole the prize.

Don’t forget the run of pics with Waxy and Goose and Waxy and Co.

Curves so good, they’s redonkulous. Curves so good, I just used the word “redonkulous,” causing Merriam to sucker-punch Webster in the nadsack.

Justin: Rachelle is primo delicioso. Lines of coke appear magically on her thigh as if laid out by tiny Colombian/liliputians (look at the pic). Pretty, sexy, and probably a little bitchy, she is the best hott in this bracket.

HusslinHoosier: Rachelle, I want to use her mounds as a pickle polisher.

Snoop Douchey Bagg: Rachelle looks like a stripper, but with those mamms, well, goddammit I just don’t care. Rachelle FTW

notadouche: Rachelle. She makes me thirsty.

Archidouchies: I’m going with Rachelle because she, unlike Minnie, doesn’t go for a man with a shaven groin. So I got that going for me.

Maxim Kovalenko: Rachelle, who looks neither pre-cancerous, or too surgically enhanced, FTW. And the fact that she hasn’t been proved to be a total idiot helps her cause too.

Well done, people. And since the voters required a second round of hott voting, we also have:

Hottest Hott of the Year #2: Super Baggio’s Clarissa

With a three pic run, beginning in late July, then a Friday Haiku, and then ‘Baggio’s response (pictured here), Clarissa ran the gauntlet of high class west coast hottitude.

Barely beating out the surging (and Hall of Hott appealing) single pic’d Mariah, and with Charleez and Francine splitting the spankable blonde ticket, Clarissa explains it all.

Sergeant Scrote Stain: This is a fine grouping of semifinalists, each with their own buxom merit. But alas, I am only one man, with only one vote, and that vote goes to Clarissa. Her beauty would send me into a catatonic episode characterized by the muttering of incoherent swear words and profuse drooling if she so much as looked me in the eyes. That means she’s hott. Very hott. Autism inducing hott, which is the hottest type of hott.

massengill: Can’t believe I forgot about Super Baggio’s Clarissa. Clarissa FTW.

toddjerad: Based on hot chick standards alone, there is no way clarissa is not the hands down winner. She’s like a perfect cross between a fake boobied jessica simpson and a baby fawn drinking from the fountain of nirvana. The others are gorgeous, but there can be only one clarissa.

Skyler: Clarissa. I’m motivated by Super Baggio’s almost nottadouche qualities, which makes me think all the more of her. Oh, and boobies.

Wheezer: Clarissa Extends Them All – you know what I mean by “extends.” But give all the hotts a celebratory Pumpy boob grab. They all deserve such a participation trophy.

This is one of those categories where we’re all winners. And by winners, I mean boobies.

# posted by douchebag1

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