Friday, January 15, 2010

Ask DB1: Where’s The Okiebags?


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Hey DB1,

Love the site, but I can’t help but notice the bias towards coastal baggery. We see plenty of Jerz Guids and LA surfer scrotes, but where are the douchebags from the middle of the country?

I grew up in Oklahoma, and I’ve noticed that your site has neglected the Okie-bag. Okie-bags have the same kind of attitude (and intelligence) as meat-clown douches from Jersey, but a different fashion sense (or lack thereof).

Rather than ginormous watches, they wear ginormous belt buckles. They often wear a cowboy hat over their mandana. They buy Wrangler cowboy jeans which are pre-faded and pre-dirtied up, since they never do any work. They drive huge gas guzzling trucks which don’t have a scratch on them because they’ve never been used to haul anything anywhere for anybody on any occasion.

They also love patriotic accessories which they obtain from a bizarro-world where the American flag was made by Ed Hardy rather than Martha Washington.

-Wes
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Consider your point well taken, Wes. We must not exhibit coastal bias when tagging douche. I will keep an eye out for Okiebags in presence of midwestern hotts for future mock on the site.

# posted by douchebag1

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