Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Ask DB1: The Six Pound Watch


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Hey DB1,

I know that one of the modern douche signifiers is something you’ve termed the “six pound watch”.
I’m looking to buy a new watch, but I’m running into the problem where they’re all freaking huge! It doesn’t help that I have tiny wrists, but why must all these watches be hubcaps on straps?

What is an acceptable watch-to-wrist ratio for a watch for it to be non-scrote? Is it even possible to buy a non-douchey watch anymore? Have watches moved purely into the realm of spectacle and out of one of function?

– Arch Douche Ferdinand
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A general rule of wrist is that the watch should be able to communicate time at no greater than a distance of eight to nine feet. If you’re staring at a blinged out sundial from thirty five feet away, it’s Six Pound Watch douche-territory, and should be mocked accordingly.

# posted by douchebag1

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