Monday, March 29, 2010

Frankie the Greasehead Gets His Gall Bladder Checked

If there’s one thing I’ve learned in my many days traversing the globe as a spice runner, anthropologist and part-time pimp, it’s this:

Gall bladder tongue removal just isn’t sanitary.

No, not even in Tijuana.

# posted by admin
4:16 pm March, 29 creature said...

are they not gasping for air as he squeezes out his most toxic flatulence?

4:48 pm March, 29 Douchble Helix said...

No picture.

You really gotta feel bad for DB1. This is his baby.

We're with you, buddy! Hang in there.

4:50 pm March, 29 Wedgie said...

Gotta love technology. It's making our lives easier.

Yeah, that's it. Easier.

4:52 pm March, 29 Troy Tempest said...

it was a sight so heinous, my browser revolted and said "Nuh – uh – you can't see this" and so it's giving me a broken image symbol.

Poor DB1.

Technology's kickin his butt these days.

Time to drink, Heavily.

5:10 pm March, 29 DarkSock said...

Hah, what a douche. he looks like a little broken square with two blue dots and a magenta triangle surrounded by a field of blank white. Ankle fucker! Broken box ass itch!

And he looks just like the broken Spongebob Sumbitch in the pic below too.

5:14 pm March, 29 DarkSock said...

annnd I checked my phone where I actually CAN see the picture…instant regret, thy sting be sharp.

Be satisfied with the little broken square, people. Some things you cannot unsee.

5:16 pm March, 29 Bob said...

Here's a question: which side of this unholy alliance is getting more infected? Him from having Bleeth skanks touch him with their tongues? Or the aforementioned skeezes for the same?

I'd say he's infecting them more, mainly because of the week's worth of layered Axe that he doesn't ever wash off.

5:16 pm March, 29 doucheywallnuts said...

I think it must be very easy these days to get two average girls to pretend to lick your stomach while out at a club wearing clothes that make you look fucking ridiculous.

5:32 pm March, 29 Mr. White said...

This summer, all the douches on Jersey Shore are going to be dressed like white rectangles. Mark my words.

5:33 pm March, 29 euripidouche said...

there has never been a more appropriate time in the history of the internet, than when viewing this pic, to encounter the message;

SERVER ERROR

well said, google, well said.

you would think waitresses who are that willing to degrade themselves could find a better gig.

5:37 pm March, 29 Fatness said...

Jeebus. This choad is so vile he broke Google.

5:43 pm March, 29 Douchble Helix said...

Yep, It works on my phone, too. It's bad, no hot chicks, really.

On my PC, I use Firefox's Mozilla and just tried Internet Explorer. Conclusion? I'm a douchebag and a nerd.

6:04 pm March, 29 Wheezer said...

Maybe this was taken just before the vomit hit…..

After all, I also had to actually see the photo before doing the same.

6:06 pm March, 29 Douchebag1 said...

Is the image still not coming up? If so, google can sickly alpace teat and I'm going back to bed.

6:12 pm March, 29 Bagnonymous said...

Back from a weeklong trip and feeling comfortable back here in my office.

Until seeing this pic, that is–now my ass burns, and I have the strange taste of fungus in my mouth. Perhaps "Server Error" is L33t code for "Don't look at this pic or it will melt your corneas."

PS. Preview button, my sweet.. how I've missed you!

6:38 pm March, 29 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

This picture has been rendered as a permanent white spot in my memory due to my blinding hatred of douchebags. Or is polar bear in the middle of a blizzard? Or is it the underside of an avalanche? Fuck it, I give up (for now).

6:39 pm March, 29 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

At least my avatar came up. Hang in there Boss. If you're forming any kind of committee to launch a cyber-attack on T.O.R. count me in.

6:43 pm March, 29 Douchebag1 said...

I have no idea how the hell they're hitting blogger itself. I'm losing this war, people. Any ideas?

7:06 pm March, 29 Wedgie said...

Holy Taco must be destroyed.

7:07 pm March, 29 Wedgie said...

Servor error. Suck my muthafuccen virtual dick.

7:07 pm March, 29 Anonymous said...

DB1,
Which email address are you using? I may have some suggestions but need some info and don't want to do a Q and A session over the comment thread.

Douche Boyardee's Cheese and Bagaroni

7:18 pm March, 29 Anonymous said...

502 error, url looks like a FLYTEETH diatribe.

7:40 pm March, 29 Chad Kroegerwitz said...

If you look very closely, his twisted abs reveal an image of my Holy Messiah Jesus. Jesus laughs at this asshat.

Run Jesus, run. Easter is nigh.

I have to cook Passover seder for my Jews now. By cooking for my Jews I mean Chef Boyardee, the kids get locked in the cellar, and I do Mrs.Kroeger nazi-style.

8:06 pm March, 29 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Frankie finally starts to see his master pan coming together.

1. Get them drunk.

2. Get them to lick abs.

3. Hope that the Prep H renders them senseless.

4. Ummmmm…

5. Run and tell 'bros about passed out chicks that licked abs.

6. Ummmmmmmm…

7. Try to find two more chicks to try this out on.

8. Leave club and go home to wank off about it.

8:07 pm March, 29 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

^ Good fuccen job Hellen Keller. Now type pLan and not pan. Good help is so hard to find.

8:24 pm March, 29 Whoop-di-douche said...

I love it when the licker is the same shade as the shaved groin, sort of a lavender-mauve hue reminiscent of frostbite before it thaws.

Or, as my old uncle Hardy's hound-dog used to arf at his owner's backscratches, "A little lower and to the right, please."

8:56 pm March, 29 Whoop-di-douche said...

I'm sure the Goddess Medusa would agree with me that the abs on this scrotewad look like the earliest manifestation of the ancient fertility goddesses of the Mediterranean lands.

Which might explain why the Skanklets are worshipping her with more than lip service.

8:58 pm March, 29 Whoop-di-douche said...

You'd think by now, with the smells emanating from this photo, FLYTEETH would have come around to do his usual fly-drawn-to-stink tricks.

But alas, he's nowhere to be found.

9:01 pm March, 29 Whoop-di-douche said...

You know, fellow mockers, there is Holy White Triangle, and then there is HOLY WHITE TRIANGLE,and ne'er the two should meet.

9:32 pm March, 29 Wedgie said...

GSR fuckwad.

10:27 pm March, 29 Baron Von Goolo said...

All he'd have to do is stick the tip of his tongue out of this mouth and he'd look just like a cartoon kid from a canister of powdered oats from the 1940s. As soon as his frat brothers realize that, he's never going to get another blowjob at that college again.

In the meantime, I hope that belt buckle is signaling his intention to have sex with a wall socket. That I would pay to see.

10:48 pm March, 29 Medusa Oblongata said...

@ Whoop 1:56

Indeed, the modern day scrote pays homage to the many breasts of ancient idols by flexing their abs and showing off their own wee teats. However, What they do have correct is a crotch festooned with small critters as seen on the statue.

@ BVG 3:27
Gotcha.

1:27 am March, 30 Mr. Fwaphammer said...

Otis looks like he's trying not to crap himself.

9:10 am March, 30 Steve L. said...

if it's not gall bladder, then it must be erectile dysfunction.

and if it's erectile dysfunction, then i'm afraid no amount of hottie tongue will solve that problem.

which suits me just fine.

1:08 pm March, 30 my friends call me @$$hole said...

this makes me believe, even hope, that the mayans are right

9:19 pm March, 30 Anonymous said...

Malcolm is taking that "In the Middle" thing a bit too literally.

8:38 pm March, 31 shit-stained underpants said...

Ewww, stop it icky girls, stooop iittt, where's my zima a cranberry, let's talk about Gossip Girls and that large chunk of milk chocolate deliciousness throwing up gang signs over there, Yuuuummmm

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