Tuesday, March 30, 2010

HCwDB Turns Four!!!


Happy birthday fellow hunters and huntresses, mockers and boobie hottie suckle thighs!

I was hoping to have your birthday gift ready (the new site), but alas, the going is slow when the tech team is drunk.

But soon. Soon, mocking mandanas and lusting for cleavite will go to the next level.

Or maybe it won’t.

Hell if I know anymore.

Either way, we’se four.

# posted by admin
2:06 pm March, 30 Anonymous said...

Marsha, Jan and Cindi. All grown up. Too bad Greg is still a tool.

2:17 pm March, 30 Bob said...

Oh, man, what a birthday gift. Prime examples of barely legal uberhott perfection, all 3 of them. And a choadscrote confirming with both hands that, yes, this is the 4th birthday. Good boy! Now get away from those hotts!

And boss, don't sweat the new site not being up yet. It'll get there. I'd sooner have it right than right now.

2:21 pm March, 30 Tony Ventresca said...

Message to Greg: You do NOT look like Johnny Depp. Please stop trying.

2:30 pm March, 30 Bagnonymous said...

Stacks of UCC's, a huge fuccen punch bowl, and Vivid Video's version of the Brady sisters (not too bleethed-out, either). Sweet!

The only thing to make this birthday celebration better would be if Bandana McWristbands got kicked in the face. And then sodomized by Toby Keith. 'Cuz you know they'd both like it.

2:34 pm March, 30 MC 900 Foot Douchebag said...

I can only pray this site dies before the age of 5 for lack of content. Unfortunately I don't see that happening. Fucking stupid douchebags.

2:36 pm March, 30 Wedgie said...

^WTF?

Happy fourth and best wishes for the next four.

2:37 pm March, 30 RAPETIME said...

Congrats, DB1. I hope that you're getting swole and that your jump-offs are behaving properly.

Lets get a fist pump for HCwDB!

No?

Howzabout a "fuck Fung"?

I knew you could do it.

2:43 pm March, 30 Fatness said...

Congratulations DB1. Night Train for all!

2:50 pm March, 30 Captain Bringdown said...

Getty Lee is not impressed. He just wants his fucking rum and coke already.

Me? I want a turn at the freshman volleyball team too. Free drinks to the first girl who agrees to lock her ankles behind my ears. Free car to the first girl to hand me one of Andrew Ridgeley's testicles. I need it, along with a jigger of Sly Stallone's ass crack sweat, for a new drink called the Wham-bo!

Happy anniversary there boss. Ya know, there are folks out here who can "tune-up" IT problems. Just need a link to a Google Maps address. This can happen.

3:14 pm March, 30 Wheezer said...

Happy Birthday to HCwDB! Let's celebrate by nibbling on some ass pear…..

3:18 pm March, 30 Chad Kroeger said...

Vin's Russian chicks could suck your cock from the neighbor's yard.

I am having seizures.

3:27 pm March, 30 End the Haberdouchery said...

Happy Bday HCwDB!

DB1, I'm sending you a box of used glow band necklaces dripping with the sweat of only the naughtiest of coeds.

3:39 pm March, 30 baleen said...

Myself, Jergens, and Brawny will be celebrating the site's birthday in style tonight.

cheers!

3:50 pm March, 30 Ricky Martin said...

Hey, I'm gay! Are you surprised?

3:52 pm March, 30 Maxim Kovalenko said...

Happy birthday everyone! The Twinkies are too your left, the Train is to your right.

4:24 pm March, 30 Chad Kroeger said...

@Ricky Martin

Shocked you sexy homo.

5:04 pm March, 30 Fat, Drunk, and Douchey said...

Damn, DB1. I didn't get you anything and yet you provide a gaggle of girly goodness for me to lust after. You are a kind and thoughtful man. Congrats!

5:08 pm March, 30 El Caganer said...

A hostees cupcake with a candle shall be consumed in your honor. Happy birthday!

5:22 pm March, 30 creature said...

The flame & itch of anal warts manifests itself in the evil Hindu apparition known as Rashie Baghdana… poor delightful blondes who made poor partner choices while drunk on Goldschlager down in Daytona will now have to employ the always painful bunghole rasp

5:28 pm March, 30 creature said...

btw, boss happy aniv… now go eat a shank of lamb, gefelte fish, some unleven bread & wash it down with some Man-schweitz… um frozen it goes good on ice cream

5:52 pm March, 30 Bob said...

@Wheezer – now that is some high quality ass pear!! Juicy!

6:05 pm March, 30 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

@ Wheezer

Why am I suddenly thinking about dromedaries?

@ DB1

Congrats Boss on the 4th. I, like most of the others, didn't seem to get you anything. Sorry 'bout that. Little low on cash, yaknowwhatimean? But you give the gift that keeps us giving. Thanks and happy B-Day!

6:08 pm March, 30 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Why doesn't someone tell Eddie Munster that he wasn't on the Brady Bunch? Why isn't anyone kicking his ass? Why are they amused by this tool? Why does Jesus need two drinks, can't he make them himself? Why am I so full of questions?

7:08 pm March, 30 MC 900 Foot Douchebag said...

@Wedgie…

If the site dies it's because there are NO MORE DOUCHEBAGS!!!

That's what I was going for, not that the site actually dies.

7:09 pm March, 30 Douchble Helix said...

I don't know, Jeff Spicoli seems to be aging pretty well.

7:40 pm March, 30 Troy Tempest said...

Four years? WTF? Man, time flies…

7:40 pm March, 30 Baron Von Goolo said...

Happy Birthday, monument of mockery. I shall spend the afternoon slurping a 40 oz. doodie p in your honor.

8:10 pm March, 30 Baron Von Goolo said...

…and kudos to Is She Really Going Out With Him for being the Clip Of The Week on the current episode of The Soup.

You've been pointed out and mocked by The Best now. Rest your weary head.

9:12 pm March, 30 Anonne Huntress said...

Happy Birthday HCwDB!

9:37 pm March, 30 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Happy Birthday HCwDB. In douche years that would be, what…old enough to sport a fauxhawk and pierced ears, but still young enough to get away with grabbing the baby sitter's tits and have her help you go wee wee?

Ah, youth is wasted on the young. Here's to four more years of mock and ass pear. Can't wait for the movie.

10:14 pm March, 30 End the Haberdouchery said...

@Ricky,

My Facebook status today: If Ricky Martin is gay, then everything I know about heterosexuality is wrong.

11:21 pm March, 30 clam fist said...

Congratulations. Keep up the good fight.

11:47 pm March, 30 Medusa Oblongata said...

Adrien Brodybag on the right kinda does it for me a little. Of course, I'd tear that cheesy-ass shirt off of him, crush that scissor-hand under my boot and then use those flowing locks to drag him down to the basement and tie him to a pipe. But after three hours of me perching on his face, he'd learn to like me.

That greasy, fluff-stached bandanabag in the middle would not fare so well. I would make car mats for my '58 Buick from his smelly hide. And I would take all three of those girls for a ride in their undies.

11:49 pm March, 30 Medusa Oblongata said...

…..and what would a birthday celebration be without cake? Congrats, DB1, from the bottom of my fart.

12:08 am March, 31 Chris in 'Baghdad said...

I've only been fragging the site for 2.5 yrs but I love it….1.0 or 2.blow doesn't matter to me. It's original, entertaining, and critical to the preservation American cultural norms. Plus BOOBIES. Good job DB1!

12:30 am March, 31 Snoop Douchey Bagg said...

Happy Doucheday…. umm… I mean Birthday DB1.

And why is the bag on the right wearing a hospital gown? Has he just escaped from the psycho ward? Or is he auditioning for the lead in the Midtown Players local production of Jesus Christ Superstar? Or is that Jesus Christ, Wottadouche?

Time to color Easter Eggs.

And by eggs I mean all three blondies' ovaries. With my spoozle.

1:25 am March, 31 euripidouche said...

Listen, you fuckers, you screwheads. Here is a man who would not take it anymore. A man who stood up against the scum, the cunts, the dogs, the filth, the shit. Here is a man who stood up.

or did what we do here…

for darksock

I used to have a pony, on Coney Island. It got hit by a truck.

2:12 am March, 31 pv1 said...

One, two three… Pop bottles!

5:15 am March, 31 Whoop-di-douche said...

Lissome blondes Eenie, Meenie and Miney celebrate HCwDB's Fourth B-Day with C-cups and clear cups, while There Ain't No Moe and Uncle Fester douche on.

5:41 am March, 31 Meghan said...

is that Jesus on the right flippin the peace sign?

8:58 am March, 31 Steve L. said...

i look forward to a healthy debate on what constitutes a non-douchey brand of alcoholic beverage for this occasion.

i also look forward to having a gangbang with all the hotts in this pic.

what? you mean that's NOT one of the perks that come with the four-year HCwDB anniversary celebration?!

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