Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Wednesday Limerick


In Brooklyn there’s Hipsterbag Marty,
Who wears ‘beaters to a Williamsburg party,
He hits on Paola,
Who sells homemade granola,
Then tells her in his pants he did sharty.

# posted by admin
8:09 pm March, 31 Anonymous said...

she looks like shit. how about that?

8:11 pm March, 31 Medusa Oblongata said...

Eurohott Paola did wonder
how ever she made such a blunder
She matched her night's togs
with this smelly dog's
And she wished for a safe place to chunder.

8:14 pm March, 31 Medusa Oblongata said...

A dusky Italian flower
did party until a wee hour
she met with a choad
a most greasy toad
and said, "Damn dude, you need a shower!"

8:25 pm March, 31 Chad Kroeger said...

If I wasn't drunk
I would have thunk
That I could write a limerick better.
But after some sherry
I think that I want to get her.

But she is a dirty whore. And he thinks one day he could be Bono. Douche. And that was the worst fuccken limerick I have ever written.

8:37 pm March, 31 Wedgie said...

There once was a young man named Dave
Who kept a dead whore in his cave
He said with a smile
It sure stunk for a while
But think of the money I save.

8:39 pm March, 31 Wedgie said...

BTW, DB1:
My toolbar now shows your site's name on it instead of "Cannot Find Server".

You guys are makin' progress.

Speaking of cannot find server, where's my fuccen waitress? I come to Hooters for the good service.

8:41 pm March, 31 DarkSock said...

Young Mickey, during one of his benders
Decided he wanted inside of Jan's suspenders
When her trousers he shucked
Exposed a dong tucked
He shrugged and took a rear-ender.

8:41 pm March, 31 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

In the wee hours after the dance,
Young douche thought he might take a chance
To stuff his small pole
Into her honey hole
If he could only undo her ski pants

8:42 pm March, 31 scrotum pole said...

Helga was an East German Frau',
To the Communist Party she'd bow.
Her love would have faded,
But the reason they dated,
That damned hat looked just like Chairman Mao.

8:45 pm March, 31 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

The beer it had messed with his head,
And made his cockk quite literally dead,
With no chance at a screw,
And not much else to do,
He just stared at her small tits instead.

8:54 pm March, 31 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Young Anglina Jolie was quite guarded,
When the paparazzi questions all started,
To poke and to pry,
As to how and to why,
She kept ending up with the retarded.

8:59 pm March, 31 Bob said...

Though Seamus was, of course, drunk
On seeing her boobies, he thunk
"Oi'ed shore loik tuh screw 'er"
And then after, he threw her
To his mates, who also would dunk

8:59 pm March, 31 scrotum pole said...

Even though they made love last December,
Dumb Tony just couldn't remember.
Should I take a big chance,
And pull down her pants,
Without first taking off the suspenders?

9:05 pm March, 31 Doucherado said...

We all thought he was gay
Until something happened one day
He met with Bianca
And wanted to spank her
So he started dressing like Che

9:13 pm March, 31 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

The bib on her chest is all blue
Its to catch his spit when they screw
He is not so sophisticated
And in love, his '1' is overrated
But she's kinky, she likes to see spew

9:13 pm March, 31 scrotum pole said...

Nadine would quite often brag,
About Seth, her douche hipster-bag.
He'd bang her like a drum,
And after he'd cum,
She'd clean up with that nasty blue rag.

9:19 pm March, 31 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

The poster on the wall says 'Dirty'
This is a place where she can be flirty
But this choad with the beer
Won't get any more near
Cause that would be too…fucced up?

9:23 pm March, 31 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

He sits on a couch that is red
And asks the hott chick for some head
But she leans on him
And says, "Listen up, Tim…
I'd rather blow a guy that was dead

9:30 pm March, 31 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

He holds a beer that is green
It reflects in his greasy hair sheen
But this does not matter
What he most needs is a ladder
Aw fuc, who we kiddin? I'm just being mean

9:32 pm March, 31 Vin Douchal said...

While imbibing in downtown Tijuana
A chiquita said "Hey do you wannna?"
"If you've got a cockk
"Up my ass it can dock
And it'll only cost you a dollah"

9:34 pm March, 31 creature said...

Eduardo thought his new look was a hit
he posed as a guerrilla rebel legit
but to his surprise
in everyones eyes
he resembled Che Guevara's shit

9:35 pm March, 31 Anonymous said...

Hipsterbag Mickey has search’ed,
for nipples e’er since he’d been birth’ed.
He kept searching on Paola,
the professional scowla.
But them nipples they just stayed revers’ed.

9:35 pm March, 31 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

He thinks, "I can score this, I'm able."
She thinks, "I'll rest my arm on this f'ugly table."
And so Venus meets Mars
Its the scene in all bars
And the only thing he'll lay is his cable

9:35 pm March, 31 Vin Douchal said...

A chick with some nice BJ lips
And a rather nice set of them hips
Knows it's going nowhere
Cause he's closeted queer
And his manboobs project woman nips

9:36 pm March, 31 Anonymous said...

Paola stands with a look of detest
While Marty stares at her chest
He notices not her misshapen hips
Also unaware of the value of those lips
For I believe her DSL’s are the best

9:40 pm March, 31 Anonymous said...

This chalet was a stinky dark hole,
and Mickey was stuck getting swole.
If Paola’s ski pants,
would escape to south France,
He could shove in his grimy ski pole.

9:41 pm March, 31 creature said...

"do you want me or my retarded brother?
you can have one or the other
for 2 bucks a throw
in our holes you can stow
your cock if it's covered in rubber

9:42 pm March, 31 Vin Douchal said...

She peers with a look of disdain
Her strap-on caused this douche much pain
Pile driving his ass
Yelling comments most crass
He liked it she did ascertain

9:51 pm March, 31 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

He commented they dressed quite alike
To no avail, for she was a dyke
He had hoped to bone
But he'll be fwapping alone
After she tells him to take a long hike

9:53 pm March, 31 Vin Douchal said...

This Paola say , she's kinda cute
I'd like to pee in her turd chute
Watch my sauce as it drips
From her full ethnic lips
On this topic I'll admit I'm astute

10:00 pm March, 31 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

This brother-sister circus act
Takes a break backstage and that's a fact
Its my opinion he's a little choad
And she strikes a pose as if she'd ho'ed
I say that here with my best tact

10:10 pm March, 31 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Tim, the choad has a vacant stare
Its not because of his greasy hair
He'd asked Paola for her favor
And got a rejection he did not savor
Such is life in this stinkhole lair

10:24 pm March, 31 scrotum pole said...

There was a young hipster named Blair.
Who wound up in intensive care.
His date, he did bite her,
So she took out her lighter,
And torched all his greasy, black hair.

10:29 pm March, 31 Anonymous said...

Nodody used the word cameltoe and I'm too drunk. Jiust Sayin.

1:42 am April, 1 Bob said...

There's something all douches should know
When looking to mack on a ho
While boobies are nice
Just take this advice
And look for a deep cameltoe

There, happy?

3:25 am April, 1 Denny DelVecchio said...

There was a Brit wanker named Brand
Who was worth about 40 grand
He bumped uglies with Perry
Then humped Jersey Mary
Then got bum rushed by Katy's band

4:05 am April, 1 08armydoc said...

That awful thing he calls a tattoo
Leaves me feeling blue
And to that I had said
While I shit on his head
I've stepped in better shit with my shoe

Me wonders what he's looking at
For she's got the minitits of a cat
She's got tiny boy hips
And bitchin fugly lips
He says, "Hmmmm, maybe *that's* where she shat?"

4:54 am April, 1 Wedgie said...

The name of the band on the poster next to her head is "Dirty Pussy".

Coincidence? I think not.

5:04 am April, 1 Anonymous said...

PASS. PASS.
Hear me out, and by stating this I agree to suck-up all the hipster trash thrown my way.
This pic is very old, and not an original submission, it is in fact an entry into VICE Magazines DO's & DONT's, someone just sent it in here….when this was taken, williamsburg's main export was still bagels and not chunky necklaces.

11:09 am April, 1 euripidouche said...

though to fashion i rarely apply
her pants are especially high
the impression it give
is that her front sieve
is uncommonly itchy and dry.

11:12 am April, 1 Steve L. said...

even the homeless need some style.
just look at poor Gina and Kyle.
but taxpayers can't
help worth a scant
when you shit your pants a new pile.

3:33 pm April, 1 C Leeuw said...

This is from the Vice Dos and Don'ts section.

She is a babe.

4:54 pm April, 9 Katrina said...

Wow just total douche, plus a girl that appears to be wearing granny panties….wtf?

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