Thursday, April 8, 2010

Kenny Von Douchegoggles

Kenny Von Douchegoggles may love his newly acquired blu-blocker douche goggles in an ironic, playful way.

And his girlfriend, Monroe, may find it as amusing as when he drove his Nissan away from the Arco station last winter with the pump still in the car.

But it is not passable.

Douche goggles at night are automatic stage-2 mocking.  Factor in hairspike, and Kenny is Autoflush.

Sorry, Ken. You may not be making douchey hand gestures, nor have garish tatts and Ed Hardy. But the goggles, they do everything.

# posted by douchebag1
10:22 am April, 8 Troy Tempest said...

Blast Shades at night == autodouche.

10:34 am April, 8 Chad Kroeger says fuck off anon said...

Jerry Seinfeld’s cousin Kenny should not be wearin a wife beater to celebrate holy days.The chick has caused a rift with her goyish good looks and the fact that she is skinnier than Kenny’s mother Esther.

10:34 am April, 8 End the Haberdouchery said...

This could very well be Sharlene. I wouldn’t put her above this guy after her previous performances.

10:35 am April, 8 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Laugh while you can Kenny, because when you finally take those solar panels off your face you’ll be staring at an ever growing line of angry fat people waving their half eaten Wendy’s Triples in your face asking why the f*ck you’re so retarded you would put pickles on when they specifically asked for NO F*CKING PICKLES!

Which is when you’ll direct them to the manager because Carlita’s the one who makes decisions at your burger joint, isn’t she?

10:37 am April, 8 Bagnonymous said...

I’m sorry, the trucker cap on chicks is simply not hott. Never has been, never will be.

.

Now, I’ll admit that the first couple times I saw a girl sporting giant designer sunglasses or the word “juicy” across her ass, I was a bit turned on. Those, of course, got old after about a week. But a trucker cap? Yeeach. Just about as bad as one of those deep, gruff smoker’s voices.

10:38 am April, 8 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

And Jesus, when did Bumpits start making hats?

10:40 am April, 8 Bagnonymous said...

PS. Looks a bit like Kathy Hott to me…

10:41 am April, 8 Vin Douchal said...

Kenny celebrates his release from Juvenile Hall after doing a 48 hour stretch for vandalism by pounding some “Stones” and regaling the group with his first hand account of pepper spray

10:46 am April, 8 jcdouchey said...

schnozzle!

11:08 am April, 8 El Caganer said...

I pooped in a trucker style hat. I wish it was that one.

12:13 pm April, 8 Claude Douchenburg said...

So what’s wrong with goggles?

12:56 pm April, 8 Douche Springsteen said...

I think that’s my cousin. I’m not joking. Gonna have to have a talk with that boy or else I’m never buying him booze again.

2:38 pm April, 8 jonezy said...

having Andy Samberg’s chin is also an auto-douche +1

2:50 pm April, 8 fantagor said...

“I wear my sunglasses at night

So I can, so I can

Be the biggest scrote in sight.”

3:07 pm April, 8 Whoop-di-douche said...

It’s so douche one can’t even give him fashion credit for coordinating in white. He probably borrowed her shades anyway, which is a double-douche maneuver.

4:16 pm April, 8 Douche, the final front-rear said...

Looks like Andy Samberg’s about to score!

5:45 pm April, 8 Medusa Oblongata said...

Quick, give me some gasoline and a match.

I’m using on myself. I’m trying to be a better person.

6:41 pm April, 8 Douche bigalow said...

There once was a girl named Monroe

who turned heads everywhere she would go

til goggle wearing Ken the scrote

convinced the young lass to upon him dote

and now she is is at best so-so

8:14 pm April, 8 CleverDouchePun said...

I think even without those goggles, I would strongly dislike this man. It’s something about the chin. And that smile… Ugh. Not his fault. But still makes me want to hurt him.

8:32 pm April, 8 The_Postdouchster_General said...

Its like a honkey, douchey P Diddy.

and tat rhymes, im a rapper!

12:17 am April, 9 Medusa Oblongata said...

Matt Damon really let himself go after that last Bourne movie.

12:20 am April, 9 Steve L. said...

whoa now i understand why the Trollbag came back. i also predict that the Trollbag’s next installment will feature Kenny’s goggles.

7:56 am April, 9 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

When your hat is bigger than your ENTIRE head, you’ve either got one small-ass mellon or shitty fashion sense.

4:52 pm April, 15 Anonymous said...

that girls a bitch, an ugly one.

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