Sunday, April 25, 2010

Douchebags and Parking Lots: Like Jersey and Gum Snap

Proving that empty parking lots at 2am are the clarion call for all late night douchebags, I give you HCwDB legend DJ Bello.

Still out there. Still frolicking. Without women. In parking lots.

Normally we require both a Hot Chick and a Douchebag to be on the site. But for the hilarity of DJ Bello, we make an exception.

# posted by douchebag1
8:45 am April, 25 Thus Spake Zaradouchestra said...

I cant wait to see the next Ed Hardy accessory for shopping carts.

8:52 am April, 25 Anonymous said...

Well that’s embarrassing…

8:53 am April, 25 creature said...

the frollick is how he shakes the jizz outta his crack

8:56 am April, 25 creature said...

btw, after checking the Forbes list of wealthiest americans recently, HJBBAD was shockingly absent from the list???

8:57 am April, 25 G said...

I think we have it wrong…the douchebags were waiting in the Walmart parking lot for their moms.

9:16 am April, 25 Deltus said...

If we didn’t make an exception, we’d never see DJ Bello, which would be saddening, because he is amusing and gameless. Seriously, Richard Simmons picks up more hott than him.

9:20 am April, 25 El Caganer said...

They just be waiting for their bro to come out with the case of beer. The bars have a last call at 2am in Michigan. Then you meet up at some ones house. These guys are included because they are willing to make the beer run.

9:40 am April, 25 Baleen said...

On the other side of the parking lot, Buffalo Beast discreetly loads a clip into his HK and quietly resumes the roundup of shopping carts and soon he will clock out having finished the day’s shift.

9:50 am April, 25 Wheezer said...

Well, that was indigestible. Did anyone else notice how the camera kept dipping to the choads’ nether regions? I had to stop the clip once that started, so I don’t know how it finished.

.

Anyone? Bueller?

10:09 am April, 25 Douchble Helix said...

Is the interior of this douchebag’s car on fire?

11:03 am April, 25 El Caganer said...

Where in the hell is clam fist? I haven’t seen him since he left the walmart parking lot in a cloud of black exhaust Thursday. He’s close to getting his ass fired.

11:11 am April, 25 massengill said...

Did anybody make it beyond 1:13 or am I the current record holder?

11:13 am April, 25 DarkSock said...

Like Jersey and gum snaps indeed….but the only thing snapping Bello’s gums are his brah’s freshly shorn ballsacs.

11:29 am April, 25 doucheywallnuts said...

Wow…being a Jersey resident I am embarrassed, and that’s saying quite a lot…these chodes make the chodes from the Jersey Shore look like Ivy League graduates. And think about the futility of this exercise; getting all prettied up to sit in a superstore parking lot at night so you can be videotaped alone dancing to horrendous music without a bleeth in sight…for shame.

11:30 am April, 25 Chad Kroeger said...

Yikes! All I can say is I know by espionage that Dark Sock has not peed in his butt once. Maybe twice. But you have to hold the guy down with all that clown dancing.

11:37 am April, 25 Chad Kroeger said...

On second view I can’t believe people act like that.

Where is the Hummer douchebag to smash these little girls. And lunch has to be repeated.

11:57 am April, 25 Soy Bomb said...

Bone-chillingly creepy.

.

.

.

.

and gay.

11:59 am April, 25 MC 900 Foot Douchebag said...

As a former professional cameraman I take issue with the douchebag move of turning the camera on its side. There is no motivation for this move, nor does it add anything to the video, unless it’s to show the dementia associated with these tools. Though I doubt they would understand that use of a camera to denote deep mental issues.

And really, when you’re 21 do you really still hang out in a parking lot? Once you’re legal to drink WHY!? would you ever???

http://www.myspace.com/djbelloo

12:21 pm April, 25 Steve L. said...

hey where’s JESSICA to come to the defense of DJ Bellow’s hott-douching credentials?

…you mean “she” was DJ Bello himself all along?

… i really didn’t need to know that.

12:46 pm April, 25 Justin said...

I think it’s time Bello gets an award of some kind. He is legendary.

Hall Of Scrote?

12:54 pm April, 25 Adrian said...

Why the fuck do these retards turn their camera sideways??? It’s not a fucking picture that can be rotated.

1:16 pm April, 25 Douchie Howser M.D. said...

This rivals Top Gun in terms of latent homosexuality.

1:28 pm April, 25 Wheezer said...

Check out broheim Mikey! LMAO! But don’t look at the photos – hat tilt, orange, and GSR abound…..but hotts don’t. (Shocker.)

1:52 pm April, 25 Horace Dangleballs said...

Ladies and Gentlemen… RiverDouche!

As for the 90 degree camera tilt, I submit that they do so because that’s how they’ve seen asshats on TV hold their firearms. Thus, in their twisted version of logic, the 90* tilt on anything becomes cool.

2:35 pm April, 25 Medusa Oblongata said...

Well, hello, my sweaty little meat sacks.

.

While I am displeased to be back on American soil and at work, I am pleased to be back here with all of you. However, seeing DJ Bello has caused me gastric distress of a most unpleasant nature. Or maybe that’s last night’s airline food worming its way out, I’m not sure. Either way, there’s never been a better time for a drive-by shooting than the moment this video was shot.

2:53 pm April, 25 Anonymous said...

if you just watch his feet, he has some pretty sweet moves. beats michael jackson at least. give the guy some credit. at least he is not stealing any hot chicks. if you have a young son, you prolly want to keep him away from bello tho.

3:31 pm April, 25 Wheezer said...

Welcome back, Medusa! Glad you have a fine time n Italy! : D

3:31 pm April, 25 Wheezer said...

in*

3:33 pm April, 25 Chad Kroeger said...

I have been to church drunk today. I have fed my girls and cut the lawn and peed in a dog. Golf was kind of fucked cause it snowed. DJ Bello must be shunned as an Amish Pennsylvanian who uses electricity. He is inexcuseable and an affront to a weekend on a shitty Dell computer. Please leave his likes and the dreaded Jed for midweek to cause less nervous breakdowns.

3:36 pm April, 25 Captain James T. Douche said...

Put your vest back back on and finish with those carts Bello!!

3:48 pm April, 25 El Queso said...

@Medusa Oblongata: Welcome back.

3:57 pm April, 25 Crucial Head said...

So, Medusa comes back the same day that DJ Bello returns to HCwDB.

.

Hmmmmm. Biscotti. Bello. Biscotti. Bello. Hmmmmm.

.

Has anyone ever seen Medusa and DJ Bello toget… no… no way… it couldn’t be.

.

Could it????

3:58 pm April, 25 Crucial Head said...

Just kiddin’, my redheaded Siren of all things scathing, soothing, and scintillating.

3:59 pm April, 25 lupus john wilcox said...

weird, i always thought this kind of scene was around restrooms at the local park

4:05 pm April, 25 Douchie Howser M.D. said...

Medusa!

4:19 pm April, 25 Douchey Lewis and the News said...

That was just awful…really…awful.

6:27 pm April, 25 Medusa Oblongata said...

Thank you all, it’s great to be here again. And the only thing that could make it better was if I were Flamenco dancing on DJ Bello’s nutsack with golf cleats.

.

.

Croosh, you rascal. 🙂

7:30 pm April, 25 Troy Tempest said...

Ummmm, this guy lives in Arizona. So it seems him and his buddies either originated in NJ and moved west, or, the Jerz accent is being affected by every taint west of the Mississippi.

Children get their skin burned off every day so this pukestain can frolic.

I want to hear William Shatner intone:

DANCE!

.

…. to the BOOGIE…

.

get…down….

.

.

.

Because—- the Boogie Nights…

.

are.

.ALWAYS

the BEST…

.

.

.

.

In town!

7:37 pm April, 25 DarkSock said...

@ Troy

Or Adam West, in a pinch. I always thought Shatner and West should hook up while they can still both get it up. Will could be Adam’s “Robin”, and Adam could be Kirk’s “Spock”.

.

In Furries.

10:49 pm April, 25 massengill said...

@ Medusa

Welcome back! I’d like to further your drive-by shooting idea and suggest it go down Back to the Future style: a bunch of Libyans in one of those 80s Toyota terrorist vans.

11:31 pm April, 25 Euripidouche said...

welcome back medusa, i hope your gondolarhea clears up before the credit card bills come due.

11:58 pm April, 25 Douchie Howser M.D. said...

Ms. Oblongata,

In gratitude for your return, I proffer an alternate “gravatar”

Medusa

May you stomp on my nuts, because I deserve it…

and because what does not kill me will make me a stronger ‘bag hunter.

12:42 am April, 26 Douchie Howser M.D. said...

@ DarkSock, 7:37 pm, April 25, 2010:

Denny Crane is an indiscriminate alpha male top, while West’s assumed name of “Batman” is a thinly veiled allusion to his preferred name of “Buttman.”

Batman’s ready for the Furry angle, obviously.

Captain Kirk, however, as he did with all aliens he encountered, will need to bang many species before deciding on his Furry persona.

2:29 am April, 26 Douche Scroets Scrociety said...

DJ Bello? More like DJ Smello

Wigga got bitches in tow? Hell no

Getting crunk Jersey style really floats his boat

Parking lot poobag is the definition of scrote

4:51 am April, 26 Simon said...

Ms. Oblongata,

In gratitude for your return, I proffer an alternate “gravatar”

Medusa

May you stomp on my nuts, because I deserve it…

and because what does not kill me will make me a stronger ‘bag hunter.

6:13 am April, 26 Ian said...

Ummmm, this guy lives in Arizona. So it seems him and his buddies either originated in NJ and moved west, or, the Jerz accent is being affected by every taint west of the Mississippi.

Children get their skin burned off every day so this pukestain can frolic.

I want to hear William Shatner intone:

DANCE!
.
…. to the BOOGIE…
.
get…down….
.
.
.
Because—- the Boogie Nights…
.
are.
.ALWAYS
the BEST…
.
.
.
.
In town!

6:43 am April, 26 DarkSock said...

I keep hearing an echo in here.

10:51 am April, 26 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Why, oh why can’t there be a Toyota assembly plant right across the street from this parking lot? Or a gun range?

11:50 am April, 26 Whoop-di-douche said...

He’d be a lot more fun if he showed us his bello-button: OFF.

3:31 pm April, 26 MILLS said...

Well i watchd the whole vid cos im a hardcore douchespotter and am intrigued by shit like that hah lol this guy reminds me of a mathew lillard if he turned into a guido.. for those of u who remember the movie scream.

12:09 am April, 27 Tony said...

Well i watchd the whole vid cos im a hardcore douchespotter and am intrigued by shit like that hah lol this guy reminds me of a mathew lillard if he turned into a guido.. for those of u who remember the movie scream.

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