Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Dr. Rosentongue

I don’t have much to say to Dr. Rosentongue, except that I, too, feel a strange kinship with Vitaly Klitchko.

What I do want to say is that Maureen is greased up angelic boobie sunflower perfection of suckle thigh dream boat leg hump.

I would tai-bo naked through a field of thumb tacks and angry scorpions just for the chance to apologize for my inability to fact check her great uncle’s long unpublished manuscript about a magical fruitfly named “Tito.” Because it was written in 1958. In Esperanto.

And then I would lie uponst her ankle and bite playfully.

And then more aggressively.

And then playfully again after she said, “Ouch.”

But it was the “ouch” that I take into my feverdreams later that night.

# posted by douchebag1
7:07 am April, 6 Wheezer said...

While you’re omnomnomnom-ing Maureen, I’ll partake in the impending play between baby blue bikini and her blonde friend in the background. Blondie is seen here as she’s proposing the idea. “Hey, I think you missed a spot on your back. Let me rub some lotion on it.”

I’ll be right back…..

7:27 am April, 6 creature said...

can’t blame the good dr for drooling all over Maureen, looks like he lingered at her cleavag… what is of interest is the backdrop, to the right of Mo are 2 tanning blonde bunnys & a twitching red pool skirt. to the left of Doc is a curdling toxic douche cocktail

7:28 am April, 6 Bagnonymous said...

That’s me, cut off on the right side of the pic, fluffing my swole cockk and gettin’ lubed up for Maureen. I’m sorry if its size makes any of you jealous.

7:28 am April, 6 creature said...

… not to mention the stay puff marshmallow man

7:41 am April, 6 Baleen said...

Didn’t his mom teach him not to stand on the furniture? Poor woman.

8:07 am April, 6 Vin Douchal said...

He looks more like John Cocktoston..

B

Read him ihs rights

8:11 am April, 6 Vin Douchal said...

stoopid laptop ^

8:13 am April, 6 DarkSock said...

That’s me lying on my back in the background, holding up the orange cabana with my swole cockk.

I like em all greased up reeeal good like…SQUEAL LAK UH PIG, GAL! SU-SU-SOOOOIEEEE!

8:13 am April, 6 kneejerk said...

Wow. This new layout is awful. AWFUL

A

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8:21 am April, 6 anon said...

@ bagnonymous

If that’s you greasing up your “swole cockk”, who painted your nails? 🙂 Just sayin…

8:29 am April, 6 End the Haberdouchery said...

She is oiled perfection. I feel like he is the hotel’s tanning butler who applies sunscreen on attractive women and makes obscene gestures to other guests while doing it. Oh wait, that post said the last guy was a male model.

Who is Buffalo Beast and what did they do to earn their place in the Hall of Mock?

8:37 am April, 6 Amerigo Vesdouchey said...

Looks like a possible butterface but I’d be willing to ignore her from the neck up while I took feverish delight in panting on her oiled up navel area.

8:43 am April, 6 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

“Can I borrow your skirt for a sec? My car just hit a water buffalo. “

8:49 am April, 6 Douchble Helix said...

Those of us of a certain age have seen this guy before:

http://www.onlineworldofwrestling.com/pictures/g/georgesteele/03.jpg

8:58 am April, 6 anon said...

She almost has the exact same pancake tan circle mentioned in ASK DB1: Defining Doucheosity post this week.

The person working the cameras around here must be that same kid I used to see on the small bus every morning on the way to school that licked the windows.

Wait, that was my reflection, I was/am that kid. Wow this explains a lot. Now I must like my screen!

9:06 am April, 6 Sir Douch-alot said...

What was Mr. Bean(bag) doing at this party?

9:24 am April, 6 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

For $100 she’ll lie down on your back and oil you up nice and greasy-“Riviera” like.

.

For $200 you get to remove your back hairs from her cleavage.

.

With your cockk.

.

How else do you think she builds the lube level back up?

9:29 am April, 6 Deltus said...

There certainly is a lot of swole cockk in this picture. Maureen certainly has her pick. It should be noted that on a women with the body for it (such as Maureen here) excessive greasing, even buffed car polish, isn’t a bleethy/douchbaguettey thing. It should almost be required when such women wear a bikini.

9:30 am April, 6 MoeDouche said...

Oh my, we can just imagine what’s under that skirt. Oh hell, let’s just say it: “Under that skirt awaits blissful ecstasy.”

9:31 am April, 6 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

BTW, that’s me on the left patiently waiting for my turn to ride “Hop-a-Long Assidy”. Six tickets gets you three laps around the deck and a roll of toilet paper.

.

This is my third time. Hopefully I won’t throw up like I did the first two times. .

11:13 am April, 6 Anonymous said...

Underhanging boobage… we’re in serious need of more of this! Anyone can show some cleavage but cleavage for short people to oggle, now that’s top notch stuff.

12:04 pm April, 6 Euripidouche said...

black 47.

Maureen got married to a sanitation worker

She’s livin’ out in brooklyn with her mother in law

And when her old man’s sleepin’

Maureen comes creepin’ down to the local bar

She stands there by the juke box

In her violent lipstick

Givin’ all the old men heart attacks

Oh maureen, dial my number baby,

You know that i will always take you back

Beat me, whip me, make me write bad checks

Oooh, i’d do anything for you

Oh, maureen, don’t be so mean

You know i’ll always be in lust with you

You know i’m out there waitin’ for you somewhere

I can feel the steam comin’ offa you

Oh, maureen, don’t be so mean

You know i’ll always be in lust with you

Maureen i never stopped thinkin’ about you

Though you kicked me out on the street

Sayin’ “take your songs and your stratocaster

See if they’re half as good in bed as me”

Then one night out on the road

Called you on a payphone “forgive me, darlin’, i’ll be back in a week”

A voice said, “hey stoopid, she want a man not a kid,

Maureen is comin’ back to canarsie with me”

Oh oh oh oh maureen you just don’t know how i feel

Oh oh oh, oh maureen i think i’m ready to scream

Oh oh oh oh maureen you just don’t know how i feel

Oh oh oh oh maureen oh maureen just the very thought of ya

Makes me weak at the knees

Just passin’ by our old apartment

Sends my body shiverin’

Throwin’ caution to the wind

I’m comin’ back to brooklyn i’m gonna save you from yourself

Put on your violent lipstick

Meet me by the fire escape

Can’t bear to think about you wrapped around somebody else

Beat me, whip me, make me write bad checks….

Oh maureen, i’ve been so bad i deserve everything,

Maureen i need some of your sweet salvation i deserve everything

Oh maureen….

5:24 pm April, 6 doucheblaster said...

this beauty is wow! Wow all i can say is wow and ahh wow! so hot i have reached a state of nirvana…there is no douche only the hot with miraculous 360 degree showing of boobie popping out that tinty top…thank you lord

5:33 pm April, 6 doucheblaster said...

hottest hott ever!

6:49 pm April, 6 Whoop-di-douche said...

Hall of HOTT, immediate induction, introduction, suckle-thigh suction.

12:20 am April, 7 Steve L. said...

Maureen’s shiny scented bodily oil may be sexy, but one would do well to fear her shiny scented vaginal oil. for it kills erections like nobody’s business.

but Dr. Rosentongue does not fear her. for he does not have erections and can only pleasure Maureen with his tongue. what do you expect?

damn. my imagination is taking on a life of its own. in my pants.

12:25 pm April, 7 Claude Douchenburg said...

I don’t know what that oily stuff on her is but it sure aint douche block

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