Friday, April 16, 2010

Friday Haiku

Spikey Blowout Ken,

Blasts wind into Simone’s face,

Hark! Too many beans.

Allergy season:

Claritin and Goose don’t mix;

danger for poor bleeths.

– Wheezer

Fungus from Ken’s head

Simone recoils in horror

From leaping head lice

– Vin Douchal

Ken mugs Bleeth Susie

while releasing Ass Kraken

to destroy Simone.

– Mr. White

The toothy eels in

Kim’s nostrils are making plans

to eat douche and bleeth.

– Dr. Bunsen Honeydouche

Axe sun tan lotion

Blatant, culture erosion

Implant explosion

– Anonymous

Ditzy young white girl,

Succumbs to sudden seizure

Just like Fred Sanford.

– scrotum pole

Oh poor sweet Simone.

Safer to stand behind horse.

Wisely shields boobies.

-Amerigo Vesdouchey

Drugs from left to right:

Cocaine, good marijuana

And lemon ball-sack

— saulgoode42

Kurt and Jen signal

“Two if by Pee”. Drunken Bleeth

should find a raincoat.

– Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt

# posted by douchebag1
7:03 am April, 16 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Lisa starts to vurp

from combo of Axe and beans

Trish to follow soon.

7:03 am April, 16 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Two boobs, two fingers,

two fingers. Its enough to

make Simone vomit.

7:04 am April, 16 Wheezer said...

Ken talks out his ass

and overwhelms boobie hott –

Needs Hollisterine

7:04 am April, 16 scrotum pole said...

Ken flicks a peace sign,

Stacey recoils in horror,

At Ken’s poor hygiene.

7:04 am April, 16 Mr. White said...

Simone will soon puke;

fondles her own boobs to try

to make sickness pass.

7:05 am April, 16 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Bewbs close to rupture

Silicone wash to follow

Drown the douche and bleeth.

7:07 am April, 16 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Massive shart is soon

to rid the world of these two.

Give Barb massive props.

7:07 am April, 16 Wheezer said...

They must be Browns fans:

Simone has the orange face

while Ken is just poo.

7:08 am April, 16 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Young Kurt Russell signs

‘Two babes’, but young Goldie can’t

stomach thought of douche.

7:08 am April, 16 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Eight abortions this month

for Karen. Doctor Douche and

Nurse Kaitlin scrub up.

7:10 am April, 16 Wheezer said...

Two immune to Axe,

Simone finds out the hard way

that three is a crowd.

7:10 am April, 16 scrotum pole said...

The couple clown as,

Lisa suddenly suffers

Cardiac arrest.

7:10 am April, 16 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

The toothy eels in

Kim’s nostrils are making plans

to eat douche and bleeth.

7:11 am April, 16 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

It’s a Fart Contest

Douche Ken survives hair blow back

But Simone looks ‘Out’.

7:12 am April, 16 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Ken and Beth argue

about who has less brain cells

while Barb’s head explodes.

7:13 am April, 16 Wheezer said...

Our “duche”bag bud Rod

told Simone to chew his ass;

reply speaks volumes.

7:15 am April, 16 Anonymous said...

Axe sun tan lotion

Blatant, culture erosion

Implant explosion

7:16 am April, 16 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

This sparse room needs some

color. Kate soon decorates

with shart and vomit.

7:16 am April, 16 Vin Douchal said...

Not a cloud of ash

Hovering over Iceland

It’s Ken’s fart/Axe cloud

7:18 am April, 16 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Jen struggles to hold

down her lunch, as she sees friend

Kim begin douche mate.

7:18 am April, 16 Wheezer said...

Party at Karen’s –

Simone regrets attendance

and last Grey Goose chug.

Now she’s so plastered

she can’t keep her hands off boobs.

I’ll help her to bed.

7:18 am April, 16 scrotum pole said...

Ditzy young white girl,

Succumbs to sudden seizure

Just like Fred Sanford.

7:19 am April, 16 Wheezer said...

Damn this formatting!

I wanted a space between

my last two haiku!

7:19 am April, 16 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Karen becomes sick

from Axe bomb she set to get

rid of douche. Poor girl.

7:21 am April, 16 Bagnonymous said...

Freckled brunette hott

Probably better in bed

Than dead bleeth, at least

7:21 am April, 16 Mr. White said...

This room needs some work,

but you might want to find some

other contractors.

7:21 am April, 16 Vin Douchal said...

Roofies kicking in

You gave her two? So did I

Yay! Time to get laid

7:21 am April, 16 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Her head is pointing

the wrong way for projectile

vomit geyser fun.

7:21 am April, 16 Bagnonymous said...

Something caught my eye:

Her arms more hairy than his

My boner just died

7:23 am April, 16 scrotum pole said...

Dude in background waits,

For moment of sweet success,

When roofies kick in.

7:23 am April, 16 Vin Douchal said...

He’s the sperm donor

For these two married lezzies

Simone faints from shock

7:24 am April, 16 Wheezer said...

Live definitions

from Urban Dictionary:

“shitfaced” and “disgust.”

7:24 am April, 16 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Bewb smash does not help

to erase the sight before

her. Puke on its way.

7:27 am April, 16 Wheezer said...

Allergy season:

Claritin and Goose don’t mix;

danger for poor bleeths.

7:27 am April, 16 scrotum pole said...

Allergy season:

It happens this time of year,

Kim sneezes again.

7:28 am April, 16 Vin Douchal said...

The Diane Farr Hott

Tells how many cockks she likes

Ken says, “Hey! Me , too!”

7:30 am April, 16 scrotum pole said...

Holy shit, Wheezer,

A simultaneous post.

But, damn, you beat me!

7:31 am April, 16 Mr. White said...

Joey then deploys

his tailbone-mounted penis.

Simone is surprised.

7:32 am April, 16 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Kurt’s ‘two’ tells nurse Jen

He just went poo in his pants

Jen and Kim confirm

7:32 am April, 16 Wheezer said...

That’s fine, scrotum pole –

we’re both allergic to choad.

Isn’t everyone?

7:33 am April, 16 Bagnonymous said...

Couple on the right

has no personality.

Run-of-the-mill ‘tards.

.

Double-peace sign cross?

Why not be more creative?

Stackhouse would crush you.

7:33 am April, 16 scrotum pole said...

Infant death syndrome,

Is not supposed to happen,

When you’re twenty-one.

7:34 am April, 16 Roscoe P. Scrotestain said...

Elbow to the tits

Causes Simone to react

to douche infection

7:34 am April, 16 Mr. White said...

Ken mugs Bleeth Susie

while releasing Ass Kraken

to destroy Simone.

7:34 am April, 16 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Kurt’s green band is from

Hollister Psychiatric

They will fix his nuts.

7:36 am April, 16 scrotum pole said...

Kim is finding out,

It’s real hard to sleep it off,

While you’re standing up.

7:37 am April, 16 saulgoode42 said...

Smug Peace knows what’s up

Stick phone jack up one girl’s butt

Boobs will catch excess

7:37 am April, 16 Bagnonymous said...

Drunken orange-faced bleeth

Tries not to puke on new boobs

Paid a lot for them

7:38 am April, 16 Roscoe P. Scrotestain said...

Ken strikes easy pose

something familiar yet odd

a feather fixture

7:39 am April, 16 saulgoode42 said...

“We’ll snip each other!”

“I’ll yank off my boobs you guys!!”

WTF is this?

7:39 am April, 16 Roscoe P. Scrotestain said...

A feather in a

light fixture, causes Ken’s hair

never mind, it’s gel

7:40 am April, 16 Vin Douchal said...

Fungus from Ken’s head

Simone recoils in horror

From leaping head lice

7:40 am April, 16 Wheezer said...

White walls represent

no cultural adornment.

Even Red Cup hides.

7:40 am April, 16 Bagnonymous said...

Dichotomy pic:

Left–way gone, but on the right?

She can still be saved.

7:40 am April, 16 Mr. White said...

Simone discovered

she could increase her cup size

if she holds her breath.

7:40 am April, 16 Amerigo Vesdouchey said...

Ken likes Taco Bell.

So, flatulently challenged.

New Tortada’s out.

.

Oh poor sweet Simone.

Safer to stand behind horse.

Wisely shields boobies.

.

.

-Amerigo Vesdouchey

7:40 am April, 16 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Kurt and Jen signal

“Two if by Pee”. Drunken Bleeth

should find a raincoat.

7:41 am April, 16 canadouche said...

baby faced douchebag

learns the hard way: too much axe

kills lesser creatures.

7:41 am April, 16 saulgoode42 said...

Drugs from left to right:

Cocaine, good marijuana

And lemon ball-sack

7:41 am April, 16 scrotum pole said...

Meg soon discovers,

The winds of change are blowing.

Are foul winds indeed.

7:45 am April, 16 Wheezer said...

“They’re just kids,” you claim?

Well, I weep for the future.

Go back to clubhouse.

7:46 am April, 16 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Meg tries to hold yak

in mouth, while Kurt, Jen signal

He’s a stage 2 douche.

7:46 am April, 16 Vin Douchal said...

Popp’d out follicles

Static electricty

From phone jack up arse

7:48 am April, 16 Mr. White said...

Simone is not sick.

She’s just letting Kuato

out to scold douchebag.

7:49 am April, 16 Douche Springsteen said...

downwind from the Axe

olfactory sense destroyed

save the boobies first

7:50 am April, 16 Wheezer said...

Googled “Kuato”

since I didn’t recognize.

I wish I hadn’t

7:51 am April, 16 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Kate learns the hard way

douche hair gel contraception

causes burned cooter.

7:52 am April, 16 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Kurt tells Jane that He’s

got to take a number two

Not new news to Kim

7:55 am April, 16 Wheezer said...

Ken needs two gallons

of donkey jizz to spike hair;

Simone’s, like, grossed out.

7:57 am April, 16 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

This couple pairs off

on the news they have both had

just two STD’s.

7:57 am April, 16 Dicy said...

Simone squeezes boobs

Says “If I wish 3 times I’ll

Go back to Kansas.”

7:58 am April, 16 Justin said...

Stench of douche too strong

Blonde recoils in disgust

Brunette’s nose? It lies!

8:01 am April, 16 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

When you miss a chance

to ‘hook up’, Bleeth demonstrates

Boobies help console.

8:01 am April, 16 Wheezer said...

Short attention spans

can’t handle decade parties –

just back to oh-six.

8:02 am April, 16 Deltus said...

Oh the tragedy!

Ken’s choosing another hott

Makes Simone’s boobs hurt

8:05 am April, 16 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Kim recoils at news

That Kurt and Jen have twice had

unprotected sex.

8:09 am April, 16 gunna said...

she grabs her own boob

abercrombie cologne stinks

fuck jimmy clausen

8:14 am April, 16 scrotum pole said...

The tragedy is,

The worm which passed through her breast,

Laid several eggs.

8:27 am April, 16 End the Haberdouchery said...

Hot self-fondling,

Or nasty acid reflux?

Either way, let’s bone.

8:58 am April, 16 Comex_Preacher said...

i haven’t got a haiku, but i have got something almost better! check out this vid i found on youtube if you hate guidos http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V5q0OWUPUpk

8:58 am April, 16 boatbutter said...

Electricity,

Fork and outlet are needed

To comb hair each day.

9:03 am April, 16 Comex_Preacher said...

sorry my bad, god fuck a monkey shit wrong link , heres the guido vid http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yPZWWEFf83Y

9:14 am April, 16 doo doo doo de doo imma douchebag! said...

lol epic fail u all r epic fail. fail! haha anyway i got 2 go now nd count the rocks on my watch y’all still buyin pebbles i got the benzels we go pop pop motherfucker know wat im sthayin?

9:26 am April, 16 Claude Douchenburg said...

2 plus 2 makes 4

Miasma, putrid decay

must protect the boob

9:37 am April, 16 Claude Douchenburg said...

can I change the first line to 2 plus 2 makes poo?

9:38 am April, 16 Claude Douchenburg said...

okay

9:39 am April, 16 Claude Douchenburg said...

2 plus 2 makes poo

miasma, putrid decay

must protect boob

(yeah that’s the ticket)

9:44 am April, 16 Wheezer said...

[9:14 am

April, 16

doo doo doo de doo imma douchebag! said…

lol epic fail u all r epic fail. fail! haha anyway i got 2 go now nd count the rocks on my watch y’all still buyin pebbles i got the benzels we go pop pop motherfucker know wat im sthayin?]

.

.

.

No, I have no idea what you’re saying. I don’t speak run-on.

But now I have this strange urge to watch Airplane!

11:47 am April, 16 creature said...

what is the process?

Sqeeze my boobs & cut a fart

to texture coat walls

12:40 pm April, 16 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

What if we stop here?

How will MuthaFucker post

one hundred? Last Call!

1:40 pm April, 16 Whoop-di-douche said...

“T.S.k, T.S.k, April is

the cruelest month,” said El-

iot, “Two-fer Bleeths!”

1:45 pm April, 16 DarkSock said...

Looks like Fanged Leeches

Found her mammal orifice

And started chewing.

1:46 pm April, 16 Whoop-di-douche said...

Ken and Kate give the

signal for cooties as Kee-

ly freaks with itchies.

1:49 pm April, 16 Whoop-di-douche said...

Stick-up hair, droopy

hair, it’s all spiked no matter

which way it’s pointed.

2:10 pm April, 16 Whoop-di-douche said...

Hedgehogs and horses

are such soulmates when manes and

body lice are involved.

4:50 am April, 18 Steve L. said...

massive explosion

required. right here. right now. smirk

needs fast removal.

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