Friday, April 16, 2010

Hannah and the Double Frostys

While I was busy building a shrine out of Albanian driftwood and sun burnt Tsitsi clay to worship Hannah’s kneecaps, Hannah seems to have wandered off and found herself in a double Frosty metro trainwreck.

Do I have an unhealthy fixation on ambiguously Semitic pixie eastern European blue eyed doe brunettes?

Why, yes. Yes I do. And I blame the Mila Kunis.

# posted by douchebag1
9:11 am April, 16 Douche Springsteen said...

I would go so far as to say that’s beyond Metro and just into fully Homo right there. Good on ya boyos, I bear you no ill will. Enjoy each other and leave us to salivate over Hannah’s kneecaps.

9:15 am April, 16 fatness said...

Hmmm…

.

.

…Hannah’s young enough to be my….

.

.

…wife.

.

.

What?

9:31 am April, 16 Mr. White said...

I might be forced to issue a rare (for me) notta here. The hair and wardrobe choices might be borderline unfortunate, but they’re both smiling and they’re one of the colors normally associated with healthy, human skin tones.

However, I still endorse this posting due to Hannah’s presence.

9:36 am April, 16 mr.reeve said...

I agree with Mr. White. The hot is very hot but the two guys are low on the doucheness scale.

9:37 am April, 16 anon said...

I want to do “things” to Hannah and Mila’s kneecaps.

At the same time.

Ah, yep that did it, I’m spent!!!!

9:42 am April, 16 Claude Douchenburg said...

ha ha ha wait till they separate after the pic only to find out the pic was a ruse to join them with super glue, muwah ha ha ha ha

9:44 am April, 16 Claude Douchenburg said...

Mr White…them boys will be doin roids soon. Wait till late summer, we will see these two again. Hannah will have come to her senses.

9:49 am April, 16 Wheezer said...

Regardless of how we feel about the metro/gay dudes, I think we should be treated to Hannah and Mila wrestling in silk.

.

.

Just my two cents.

10:08 am April, 16 Douchble Helix said...

There’s no shame in that, DB1.

10:20 am April, 16 Horace Dangleballs said...

“The Double Frostys” is a good name for a boy band.

It’s an unfortunate (but true) caption for these two goofs.

10:29 am April, 16 Deltus said...

I join with Mr. White’s notta. They’re starting to close in, but them boys ain’t even Stage 1 yet.

I also second Wheezer’s suggestion that Hannah and Mila wrestle in silk. Or oil. Or mud. Or just make out a little bit.

10:31 am April, 16 Vin Douchal said...

Hot Chicks with Light Loafer Pretty Boys

10:38 am April, 16 Just Sayin said...

I don’t see any douches.

Just dickheads. Happy dickheads.

Hot Chicks with Happy Dickheads?

10:40 am April, 16 Chad Kroeger said...

She used to give me sweet blowjobs in high school when I was the dude and she was the chick. Shortly after the release of Fast Times at Ridgemont High we had

full on sex and she left me in grade 12.. Then I was forced to date stupid blonde girls while my life cascaded into a vortex of no self-worth and despair.University led me to an unlimited stream of blondes and eventually a lovely young thing named Kelli who has led to a transferrence of my murky genes into other feminine vessels which are my daughters.

I should have killed myself 20 years ago.

10:48 am April, 16 Ed Hardouche said...

I feel funny, like a virgin, touched for the very first time, but I have to agree with those above and state my very first nottadouche. These two “guys” are definitely PDB (potential douche bags) and should be monitored closely over the next few months to see if symptoms of the disease develop.

10:55 am April, 16 Fat, Drunk, and Douchey said...

Hi. I’m Ace and this is my friend Gary. We are just really excited to be here. Have you met our friend, Hannah? She is super fabulous. OMG! They are playing the new Lady Gaga. We need to dance to this. Toodles!

11:11 am April, 16 scrotum pole said...

I would ingest several ounces of shards, ground from the glass of used syringes found in a dumpster behind a San Francisco heroin clinic, to just lightly lick the soles of her flip-flops.

11:18 am April, 16 Vin Douchal said...

A buttplaying couple from Frisco

Each other’s cockk they do throw

Did her makeup and hair

Dabbed her beauty with flair

As their faces show a light spew glow

11:22 am April, 16 Bagnonymous said...

Careful there, DB1–we don’t wanna get all up in a tizzy about Hannah’s kneecaps until we’ve actually seen them. I mean, how can we be sure they don’t look like Betty White’s elbows, or sumthin’ gross like that.

.

PS. Hey Mila, your camel has nice toes!

11:23 am April, 16 Bagnonymous said...

PPS. “Hannah’s Kneecaps” would be a great movie-title for some wretched tear-jerking chick flick.

11:23 am April, 16 Vin Douchal said...

Hannah’s kneecaps? I’d rather

Go where her thighs do gather

On her pussy I’d munch

Like a free Sunday brunch

And come up with my beard in a lather

11:26 am April, 16 Vin Douchal said...

Limerick Friday, anyone?

11:29 am April, 16 scrotum pole said...

Every time I see a woman who looks just like my first wife I wax nostalgic.

Nostalgic, by the way, is the name I’ve given to my ’92 Plymouth Voyager.

Also by the way, my first ex-wife looks nothing like the woman pictured above.

She looks more like Mr. White’s avatar.

I need a drink.

11:30 am April, 16 Bagnonymous said...

BTW, has anybody checked up on the drunken Jenna-Bush-party-girl from this morning’s Haiku? …You know, just to see if she’s still breathing, and hasn’t choked on her own vomit? Anyone..?

.

* goes back to have a look *

.

.

HEY! Dammit, Darksock!! Get off of her and pull up your pants RIGHT NOW!!! And why do I smell urine???

11:37 am April, 16 Goldiefish said...

I think the guys look more gay than douche; seriously, there is no way those guys have sex with women.

11:37 am April, 16 Vin Douchal said...

A threesome for these folks is a bore

Because her parts would sit there ignored

On just cockks they would focus

No pussy hocus pocus

Leaving this poor hot babe wanting more

11:41 am April, 16 Bagnonymous said...

@ Scrotum Pole, 11:29am:

That must be one sweet ride you got there. Do you have the optional 15″ aluminum wheels on that bad boy, or just the stock 14″ wheel covers?

11:47 am April, 16 Bagnonymous said...

If indeed Hannah’s kneecaps are round

Then I would pay more than a pound

To see derrière

(I’ll bet it’s a pear)

And my tongue in her ass would be found

1:16 pm April, 16 Anonymous said...

The barely-scrotal in the middle has an underbite so large he has to chew with his tonsils.

.

.

*I wish I had time to do a limerick.

1:17 pm April, 16 Crucial Head said...

O, for Lämp’s sake, that was me at 1:16pm.

1:33 pm April, 16 Whoop-di-douche said...

I see a hot chick and two frosted flakes.

1:39 pm April, 16 DarkSock said...

They look like barkers in a gay carnival.

“Step right up and shoot the pasties off the nipples of a ten foot bull dyke! Win a cotton candy goat! ” – HST

1:40 pm April, 16 Condouchious say... said...

prelude to a devil’s threesome?

not sure if there’s enough evidence to make a douche determination. also the gaybag potential is there, which means no devil’s threesome for sweet hannah as those two may prefer to slurp each others’ frostys…wait, do you eat a frosty with a spoon or with a straw?

1:42 pm April, 16 Just Sayin said...

I suspect they work at the make-up counter with her at Macy’s.

4:24 pm April, 16 Jimmy said...

Nice to see a post where I get quoted. What’s funnier, Purg Hottie is also a dead ringer for my mother who managed to snag my Albanian father.

5:16 am April, 18 Steve L. said...

wow where do i start?

i wish i had never seen this thread.

i only mean that in the best way. sorry.

but yeah Hannah is hot.

12:04 pm April, 18 Amy said...

O, for Lämp’s sake, that was me at 1:16pm.

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