Friday, May 21, 2010

Friday Haiku

Lohan on Twitter,

Parties with pudwacks at Cannes,

Crotch itch spreads like fleas.

Rave just gets started:

Axe, poo stench soon permeate

Stack’s parents’ rec room

— Wheezer

Basement in Belfast

Contains a halloween whore

And Depeche Commode

— Anthony LaBaglia

hair flows, open shirt

high hip leg hole panty pose

sees only douche naval

— Claude Douchenburg

Not quite “heroin

chick.” It’s more like meth and Red

Bull diarrhea.

— Sergeant Scrote Stain

Long haired posing Brit

Wants Parliament; asks for “fag”

Douche calls for rent boy

— Horace Dangleballs

Those thighs haven’t seen

sunlight in years. Donkey jizz

has high SPF.

— Bagnonymous

Chad the douche savant

Has never lost a game of

minesweeper. Not one.

— Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt

Lindsay is a skank.

Chain smoking baseball bat legs.

The herp is strong here.

-Amerigo Vesdouchey

# posted by douchebag1
7:05 am May, 21 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Cigs and nip reveal

Lead me to puke in my mouth

Just a little bit

7:06 am May, 21 Bagnonymous said...

Unsanitary!

Please put your pants-suit back on,

and pull down that shirt!

7:07 am May, 21 Wheezer said...

Stackhouse crushes “vag”

of slim ladyboy in hose:

Cam on, lefthand poo!

7:09 am May, 21 Bagnonymous said...

Carrie Bradshaw bleeth,

you smoke and you are skinny;

Okay, we get it..!

7:10 am May, 21 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Looking like Fergie

She ain’t very pretty.

Cooter on fire?

7:12 am May, 21 Mr. White said...

Pulling up his shirt

while trying to snap a pic;

choad overloads brain

7:12 am May, 21 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Lucy in the STYE

with Douchewanks. Picture yourself;

a strain in your gut.

7:13 am May, 21 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Mirrow pictures gay

Just ask b-boy Jose

He lusts for Ramone

These two just need a five iron Elin woods style. Her to. And she needs penisillin fast.

7:15 am May, 21 Wheezer said...

It’s Freaky Friday:

the basement is slammin’ and

closet is empty.

7:15 am May, 21 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Ricky Martin

Smells like my fartin.

Why does he try?

7:16 am May, 21 Bagnonymous said...

Lance Bass in background

thinks that she look fabulous

but prefers the dude.

7:17 am May, 21 Mr. White said...

Carly Simon’s niece

doesn’t have aunt’s talent, so

goes straight to Skanktown.

7:17 am May, 21 Colossus of Choads said...

Choad’s pubic mound is…

smooth as a Porche’s bonnet,

Fergie poses on.

7:17 am May, 21 Bagnonymous said...

^ looks

7:18 am May, 21 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Is that gold razor-

blade bling on Chad Nipster’s chest?

Is this retro-Douche?

7:22 am May, 21 Wheezer said...

Rave just gets started:

Axe, poo stench soon permeate

Stack’s parents’ rec room

7:22 am May, 21 Amerigo Vesdouchey said...

GSR wrecks day.

Tongue kicks the day while it’s down.

Booze will flow tonight.

.

Lindsay is a skank.

Chain smoking baseball bat legs.

The herp is strong here.

.

.

-Amerigo Vesdouchey

7:23 am May, 21 Bagnonymous said...

Stylist shaves the hair

off lower half of Wookie.

She likes the results.

7:23 am May, 21 Claude Douchenburg said...

Bubba with the hot

excited by his tummy

must be brain damaged

7:24 am May, 21 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Plenty of hairspray

on the counter in front. Should

trade for cockroach spray.

7:25 am May, 21 Vin Douchal said...

Pet Shop Boys Oh-Ten

Back to gay up radio

Zero sales so far

7:25 am May, 21 Bagnonymous said...

Those thighs haven’t seen

sunlight in years. Donkey jizz

has high SPF.

7:27 am May, 21 Anthony LaBaglia said...

Basement in Belfast

Contains a halloween whore

And Depeche Commode

7:28 am May, 21 Wheezer said...

Dressing room ho-down:

Tad would rather photograph

torso than touch chicks.

7:28 am May, 21 Vin Douchal said...

Has no body fat

Hey, good on you Nancy Boy

Go succk a fat cocck

7:28 am May, 21 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Yellow box of gold

Guarded by 2 douche leprechans

No lucky charms here

7:28 am May, 21 Colossus of Choads said...

Shirt demands cufflinks,

douche demands a fist beating,

not in that order.

7:30 am May, 21 Claude Douchenburg said...

hair flows, open shirt

high hip leg hole panty pose

sees only douche naval

7:31 am May, 21 Sergeant Scrote Stain said...

Imitation of

Angelina in “Gia”

fails in every way

7:31 am May, 21 Horace Dangleballs said...

Long haired posing Brit

Wants Parliament; asks for “fag”

Douche calls for rent boy

7:31 am May, 21 Vin Douchal said...

Sloppy messy room

All that shit hanging around

Photo’ing themselves

7:34 am May, 21 Vin Douchal said...

Lance Bass, Nik Richie

Pose before big anal scene

Hershey Choadway 3

7:35 am May, 21 Sergeant Scrote Stain said...

Not quite “heroin

chick.” It’s more like meth and Red

Bull diarrhea.

7:36 am May, 21 Claude Douchenburg said...

frosted hair douche smiles

pantless lady passes gas

bag collects samples

7:37 am May, 21 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Chad celebrates his

hairless chest, lactating breasts

from hormone treatments

7:37 am May, 21 Vin Douchal said...

Horace 7:31 FTW. Epic

7:39 am May, 21 Wedgie said...

Le douche, tres bien

Showing Euros can shave too

Too bad their chicks don’t

7:39 am May, 21 Wheezer said...

Mirror ain’t crack’d yet

but out flew cam, X, coke for

Rodd, Tad, and Harlott.

7:40 am May, 21 Sergeant Scrote Stain said...

Ex “Punky Brewster”

Star regrets trying cocain.

Lars sees his window.

7:41 am May, 21 Wheezer said...

I’m not feelin’ it;

Horace, Vin, Franklyn rockin’…..

maybe I’ll just read?

7:41 am May, 21 Mr. White said...

Backstage, opening

night. Now you know why Broadway

is slowly dying.

7:41 am May, 21 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Chad the douche savant

Has never lost a game of

minesweeper. Not one.

7:42 am May, 21 Claude Douchenburg said...

light reflects on wall

yellow box holds the good shit

bad shit roams freely

7:43 am May, 21 Sergeant Scrote Stain said...

Two wrongs don’t make a

right. Two retards and a blonde

sear my retinas.

7:44 am May, 21 Vin Douchal said...

“Groin Shave Reveal, eh?”

Asks Choad after the AceCast

Here’s to Carolla

7:46 am May, 21 Vin Douchal said...

Producers, board op

Do shit behind Ace’s back

At AceCast Central

7:48 am May, 21 Wheezer said...

Not yet as orange,

Cheeto-Man’s young bro in back

shares preferences.

7:48 am May, 21 Vin Douchal said...

A new I-Phone app

Can shave and photo the groin

It may not catch on

7:52 am May, 21 Wheezer said...

Bobby pics progress:

five more estrogen shots and

boobs begin to show.

7:54 am May, 21 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

White letters announce

the show, “Inexcusable”

Now Keir is queer douche.

7:59 am May, 21 Wheezer said...

Great for Facebook now,

but interview in ’15

doomed to crash and burn.

8:02 am May, 21 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Y’all know club soda

gets dog poop stains out of your

carpets? Need lot’s here!

8:03 am May, 21 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Lohan and gaybags

pose for a pic. Lifetime of

bad luck to follow.

8:04 am May, 21 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

There are not enough

bottles of douche water

to restore my sight.

8:05 am May, 21 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

^

^

Might work better with “Used lot’s here.”

8:05 am May, 21 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Off off off Broadway

of Lohan new production.

It’s not Rent but Bent.

8:07 am May, 21 Dicy said...

Skinny Model and

Ab Reveal Douche pose make me

Wanna vomit on them

8:07 am May, 21 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Gaybga taking pic

marvels at how he and skank

have same size meat sacks.

8:12 am May, 21 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

First post and front page!

Today is a good day to

die! Or buy lotto!

8:13 am May, 21 mr.reeve said...

Bruce bought P90X

Lance in the back screams yes!!!

Bruce likes penis

8:15 am May, 21 Ludacris Axehandle McCockkwielder said...

The dance troupe from Rent

Celebrate their positive

HIV results.

8:20 am May, 21 Turgid Meathammer said...

And Buffalo Beast

Turns his back in mute disgust

His silent mock… felt.

8:23 am May, 21 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Lindsay fears Warrant

Chad revels at lockup thoughts

Neither get their wish

8:29 am May, 21 creature said...

call made to make up

“cover up bad zebra tatt,

& herpe sore on vag”

8:32 am May, 21 DarkSock said...

dammit fuck dammit

Jiminy shit hack o’fuck

missed haikus again…

8:38 am May, 21 Bagnonymous said...

Ludacris McCockk,

nice haiku at 8:15.

Bloodwork results: FAIL.

8:39 am May, 21 creature said...

no meat on this chick

only stuffed inside her

by those holding blow

8:40 am May, 21 Bag Margera said...

In presence of hott,

Douche wants to compete with her

brazilian wax.

8:43 am May, 21 creature said...

have you heard latest?

Lindsay can kegel magnum

let’s drink warm champagne

8:55 am May, 21 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Breaking news: Lindsay’s

arrest warrant is recalled.

Can’t recall bleethness

9:07 am May, 21 Medusa Oblongata said...

Epic haiku page

good work, sorry I missed out

I made snot rocket

12:29 pm May, 21 doucheywallnuts said...

Once a movie star

Now petri dish for douche jizz

Will pass away soon

1:50 pm May, 21 Pablo Sinatra said...

Two awful douchebags

And one chick who loves herself

Get me out of here

6:57 pm May, 21 Horace Dangleballs said...

@ Vin Douchal 7:37

Thank you, sir. I guess I’ve been watching too much BBC America.

10:40 pm May, 22 Whoop-di-douche said...

I’d like to co-min-

gle his torso and her thighs

just for hell of it.

10:41 pm May, 22 Whoop-di-douche said...

Hazy, foggy base-

ment room with dope on table

matches mind on drugs.

10:42 pm May, 22 Whoop-di-douche said...

If this is clubbing,

a Neanderthal with clubs

would be useful here.

10:48 pm May, 22 Whoop-di-douche said...

Chicken thighs on chick

make tummy beef on bull seem

striped with marbled fat.

10:50 pm May, 22 Whoop-di-douche said...

Slutty skank pose makes

groin shave reveal seem silly

like otter at play.

10:59 pm May, 22 Whoop-di-douche said...

Their menu of moves

matches the spread on the ta-

be of treats quite well.

11:02 pm May, 22 Whoop-di-douche said...

Her tiny cigar-

ette could light a giant ass-

gas methane ‘splosion.

11:06 pm May, 22 Whoop-di-douche said...

Two is a groin-twat

party, three adds a laugh-track

to cellphone porn-fest.

8:23 pm May, 23 Steve L. said...

the after party

of people begging for film

roles they will not get.

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