Thursday, May 20, 2010

The Milfy Boozehound and the Shirtless Uberchoad

Stackhouse’s magnum gropus kinda took the buzz out of the rest of today’s posts.

But here’s a pretty disturbing blend of milfy boozehound and shirtless uberchoad, neither of whom deserve more distinctive names than that.

Whatever happened to No Shirt, No Shoes, No Dice?

If Spicolli had to put on a shirt back in the day, then where did we as a society go off the rails?

# posted by douchebag1
2:02 pm May, 20 Vin Douchal said...

If by “MILFy” you mean , “Gahh, she’s an ugly trollup” then, uh, okay.

2:03 pm May, 20 End the Haberdouchery said...

Isn’t this a picture of the Duggars back in ’82 before they started popping out 20 kids?

2:05 pm May, 20 Bagnonymous said...

Learn it, know it, live it.

2:06 pm May, 20 Vin Douchal said...

Is her hand blocking a Ganesh tattoo?

My own personal hell will mostly include a moment each day where this monkey-faced mofo brushes by me and leaves a snail-like slime trail on the uncovered part of my arm poking out from under my # 8 Yaz t-shirt.

Damn you, Beezlebub! Can’t I just be boiled in feces as advertized?

2:24 pm May, 20 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

This has made me question my faith. And by faith I mean she reminds me of the dirty redhead milf on The O.C. that Mrs. Kroeger told me she would do if she was bi. I have an embarrassing erection and can’t go to the dinner table yet. OUCH.

2:27 pm May, 20 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

How do you get a four-pack?

2:38 pm May, 20 Ohio FJ said...

Votes – Not A MILF –

2:41 pm May, 20 chaserofthehott said...

I would have to say she’s more like a worn out old stripper.

2:42 pm May, 20 scrotum pole said...

Her embarrassing, male second head is known to holler insults and talk trash constantly, but she’s never had it removed because it keeps her company, seems to always remember where she put her cell phone and is a great help when she’s backing up her car.

2:45 pm May, 20 scrotum pole said...

Hey, did you notice that wherever you move, her eyes and her left nipple seem to follow you?

creepy.

2:51 pm May, 20 Vin Douchal said...

Mallory Keaton has not aged well. And she’s taking that smuggling bowling balls to the less fortunate in Venezuela gig a little to far

2:54 pm May, 20 scrotum pole said...

I never remove my shirt at a bar.

I will however, drop my pants down around my ankles, and make noises like a choo-choo train.

2:56 pm May, 20 Vin Douchal said...

Wouldn’t it suck if she’s actually The Hourglass with her sun glasses off in the non-tannning months of winter ?

This may make a good arguement for needing multiple photos prior to entry into the Hall Of Hott

2:56 pm May, 20 Mr. Biggs said...

Testing testing … yet another example of how boobage can get corrupted by douchebag. She must have been a stunner once.

3:01 pm May, 20 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

She might look like 45 miles of bad highway but at least she had enough sense to put on a glove before touching this pooftie.

3:01 pm May, 20 chaserofthehott said...

@Vin,

I could see that!

3:03 pm May, 20 scrotum pole said...

Later that evening, after several drinks too many and losing her glove while fisting the shirtless uberchoad, the bleethy boozehound ended up like this.

3:14 pm May, 20 Scooby Douche said...

If by “MILFy” you mean that in high school her friends knew her as “Steve Henderson”. And she was the safety on the football team.

3:29 pm May, 20 doucheywallnuts said...

There’s something disturbingly hott about that MILF…I like MILF…

3:31 pm May, 20 mrbiggs1 said...

Can we try this again?

3:42 pm May, 20 colossus of choads said...

Hey! lay off Spiccoli dude.

3:45 pm May, 20 Horace Dangleballs said...

If she blinks will her boobs pop?

I don’t know, but I’d like to stick around and find out.

3:48 pm May, 20 Euripidouche said...

she is cartesian milfy boozehound.

there are four quadrants of experience we all share with her, fucked her, tried to fuck her, fucked someone who given age and some fresh bolt-ons could be her, and tried to fuck someone who given age and some fresh bolt-ons could be her…

some of us have multiple points to plot in one or more quadrant.

4:18 pm May, 20 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Why does she wear a glove and why do guys wear anything but a respectable watch on their wrists?? I used to wear a Rolex but realized I was becoming an old douche. My visit with Dr. Melfi will answer these questions in the morning.

4:20 pm May, 20 Crucial Head said...

Meanwhile, Buffalo Beast sits at the bar, silently pondering his favorite bands Quiet Riot and Mute Math.

4:32 pm May, 20 Just Sayin said...

Who knocked her out and did that hideous make-up job on her? That’s what you get when a 12 year old girl puts make-up on her 8 year old brother.

4:33 pm May, 20 Peter Ilyich Doucheovsky said...

“That’s no woman – it’s a man, baby!”

The first Austin Powers works on so many levels. The key around his neck is to his parent’s house.

4:52 pm May, 20 Vin Douchal said...

This is a great way to kill time while waiting for the 5 o”clock whistle to blow:

Page 3 Girls

Featuring babes from the land that eats sheep guts and wonders why their teeth turn brown

5:00 pm May, 20 Euripidouche said...

5 o’clock whistle? hell i have a left handed jew in the cube next to me, hoocoodanode?

5:15 pm May, 20 JeanClaudeVanDouche said...

Thanks to Vin…I now must hide behind my cubicle walls until my inappropriate office pup tent recedes…that or I can don my favorite hospital gown backwards and run through the nearest hospital emergency ward screaming about the benefits of mixing Viagra with cheese puffs and Night Train…good times.

5:15 pm May, 20 Troy Tempest said...

Her blank stare inhabits an inner coldness, a spiritual frigidity that is colder than the ticket taker’s smile at the Ivor Theatre…

It is a radiant stare of utter vacuity. The plastic in her boobs behaves in a more sentient manner than the few feeble braincells she has working in her brain pan.

In fact, if you took her brains and shoved them up a gnat’s ass, they would roll around like BBs in a boxcar.

7:43 pm May, 20 Baleen said...

SKAAAAAAAAAANK!

.

And yes, she can suck my cockk.

.

Provided she’s not he’s.

8:21 pm May, 20 Douchal Webster said...

There’s a name for that glove – it’s a “proctology pal” and by the look on the guy behind’s face he can smell it….

9:50 pm May, 20 Wedgie said...

Stop mocking my Mom.

10:04 pm May, 20 Ariscrotle said...

Why do I feel like those heads don’t belong to those bodies, and that those bodies belong off the coast of Somalia in a drum marked radioactive waste?

11:29 pm May, 20 DarkSock said...

Suddenly I have a hankering for Jiffy Pop. And a Jiffy Lube.

2:53 am May, 21 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Her tits are so far apart that they…

…whoa, holy hell am I drunk as fuck.

.

brb

2:56 am May, 21 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Fuuuuuuuuu-uuuuuck! {urp!}

That felt great. Ya’ll ever had a puke so big it scared the shit out o’ you while it came up, but then you swear to god not a single drop touched the inside of your mouth, which made it feel oh so good?

Yup.

Anyway, her tits are so far apar-

Fuck. Stand by.

HHHHHWWWWWAAAAAAARRRRFFFFF!!!!!

HWWUUCCKKHHGH!!! THOOOPH!!

2:59 am May, 21 Jacques Doucheteau said...

SHeeeeeEIIIIIIttttt muthafffuueeerkk- {urp} eeerrrrrssSS!!!

EYeee am goiiiin ta bed.

DEwn’t call poision control UnlEss I stop breething.. Its coool yo.

2:59 am May, 21 Jacques Doucheteau said...

*thump*

3:45 am May, 21 Steve L. said...

the only place where i would have sex with this woman is in the shower. because i’m gonna need 1 hour just to wash all that makeup off. but hey, otherwise i think she’s fine, hence why i would fuck her in the shower.

9:10 am May, 21 Medusa Oblongata said...

MILF–Monstrously Inflated Laproscopic Funbags

9:26 am May, 21 Scroteophobic said...

Mistake I’d Like to Forget?

Monkey I’d Like to Flush?

..

She’d be more of a BIL anyway – Bet I Lost.

10:55 am May, 21 Douchble Helix said...

Anybody notice if you take this douchebag, and mix him with the douchebag that db1 posted just prior to this horrible pairing, ‘Eugene’, you get Kid Rock?

10:56 am May, 21 Douchble Helix said...

This broad is scary. Think she likes me?

1:14 pm May, 21 Troy Tempest said...

I think these two are weekly bound. They just stink the place up like AXE brand tear gas.

4:38 am May, 22 Douchble Helix said...

I would say her tittays are ‘weakly bound’.

9:37 am May, 22 Jacques Douchida said...

She’s kind of freckly. But only on her face. Why is that?

Foundation that is not foundation. Mid-life crisis costs $5K.

3:49 pm May, 22 Stephanie said...

The blow up doll look…

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