Thursday, May 13, 2010

The Raisin

The pec tatt reads:

Yea, thou I walk through the valley of the shadow of douche, I will fear no prune face; for thou art with me; My rod and my nads, they shrivel like roasted tacquitos. But do not judge me. For I had a long day at the office and am a tad constipated.

# posted by douchebag1
9:38 pm May, 12 Steve L. said...

whoa a 7:02 AM post cryogenically frozen until ~ 9:00 PM?

9:38 pm May, 12 Steve L. said...

this calls for a FIRST MUTHAFUCCKAZ!

7:05 am May, 13 douchebag1 said...

Props to Steve L. for catching the accidental publish last night. He gets the first and only official props for a “FIRST” post.

.

now back to the mocking…

-management

7:14 am May, 13 Edvis said...

HOT CHICKS? This skankasauraus looks like she should be working as a receptionist for a primary care physician who’s main role is to tell drug reps that they can’t go back and see the doctor.

7:38 am May, 13 mr.reeve said...

The hot is not, but kissy lip and wasted off Malibu Rum & coke face is douche worthy foo shoo.

Is that Jean Claude Van Douche? His career is really on the up and up.

7:40 am May, 13 smackdouche said...

Is that a Keltec 9mm semi-auto sticking out of her waistband? I was gonna say “notta hott”, but out of fear,

Babe, you are rocking hot!!

7:43 am May, 13 Chad Kroeger said...

Poor George Lopez found out his stupid Mexican talk show was cancelled, got drunk on tequila boilermakers and fucked a crackhead.

7:44 am May, 13 Chad Kroeger said...

why did i capitalize mexican

7:51 am May, 13 Deltus said...

He’s either farting, or smelling a fart. Can’t decide which.

7:55 am May, 13 Amerigo Vesdouchey said...

DB1, you’re obviously not fluent in Portugese. The tatt reads: This is my “taking it up the pooper and not getting a reach around” face.

7:59 am May, 13 Mr. White said...

@smackdouche

Maybe she’s one of those Israeli Defense Force hotts.

8:01 am May, 13 bigphatnotadouche said...

Tom Sizemore caught at an awkward moment when a fan tried to preform a reach around.

8:03 am May, 13 bigphatnotadouche said...

Tom Sizemore caught at an awkward moment when a fan tried to preform a reach around.

My bad to Amerigo – stupid computer

8:05 am May, 13 DarkSock said...

Vin thought to himself “Now why would they make anal suppositories lemon-flavored?”

8:06 am May, 13 DarkSock said...

@ Mr. White:

I’d seize their Gaza Strips.

8:15 am May, 13 Mr. White said...

@darsock

When the Israeli Defense Force hotts, wearing nothing but towels and automatic rifles, ask if you’d like to pee in their butts, the appropriate response is “Ma’am! Yes, ma’am!”

8:15 am May, 13 Mr. White said...

@darksock

I’d erect a settlement in their disputed areas.

8:20 am May, 13 Mr. White said...

I’d provide them with American missile technology.

8:30 am May, 13 Amerigo Vesdouchey said...

As for the right Israeli Hott – I’d like to launch my scud missle at her landing strip.

8:35 am May, 13 massengill said...

Jeez, so I get to work, I Google Bill Hicks, and then I see this ass wipe. It’s gonna be a shitty day.

8:50 am May, 13 JeanClaudeVanDouche said...

…er…no that isn’t me. And I nominate Shanna here for the Supreme Court…and by Supreme I mean I’d snorkel her taint with a 7-11 spoon-straw.

8:59 am May, 13 mr.reeve said...

Googled Bill Hicks and this site doesn’t even come up in the first two pages. Jay Mohr or Darnell, you are even more pathetic than I thought.

9:19 am May, 13 darnell j'landry said...

There is a link to Bill Hicks on the left side of this page doofus. But some of you actually made some good points. Rather than idiotic one-liner comebacks like “shut up fag” and “fuck you”, many of the responses were much more thought out than I expected.

I won’t bug you guys anymore, and maybe I’ll even post a comment about one of the douchebags in a picture.

For now, I can’t think of anything as this current picture has killed my mind and soul.

9:42 am May, 13 Whoop-di-douche said...

His tatt reads, “I was a grape, but now I’m just a raisin in the sun.”

10:20 am May, 13 Medusa Oblongata said...

His tatt reads, “SPERM BANK: Night deposit slot.”

10:21 am May, 13 Medusa Oblongata said...

He says, “Oooooh, damn, girl, you been douchin’ again?”

She giggles. Summer’s Eve, extra vinegar.

10:22 am May, 13 Wheezer said...

We might be turning a corner if we see the choads beginning to be disgusted by their own poo smell.

12:05 pm May, 13 Troy Tempest said...

are those IDF chix or just some girls at the YWHA?

12:48 pm May, 13 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Her: My ovaries just turned to prunes!

Him: My balls just turned to raisins!

1:25 pm May, 13 Steve L. said...

i hope my newfound (albeit rudimentary) experience in time warping will become useful one day.

for now, i have to relieve my constipation. because this picture just gave me constipation.

3:03 pm May, 13 lupus john willojalick said...

see, now sh-t like this makes me question every nice looking woman i see. the trampy looking gingers i can understand being with douchelips, but seeing the mary annes confirm why i carry my own personal jr spy pap smear kit.

3:05 pm May, 13 Scroteophobic said...

@Smackdouche 0740

Actually that is the tip of her cybernetic, petrol powered strap on. She’s hanging it out to cool down after running it at 110% for several frenetic minutes. Hence his face.

1:05 pm May, 15 douchers said...

he must have caught a whiff of his personality

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