Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Four Prong Spikes His Drinks

This spikey pudwart hasn’t even won a Monthly yet (coming up on Monday), but the emerging legend that is Four Prong is making his play for the 2010 Douchie Awards.

And, dare I say it… maybe even the hallowed Hall of Scrote.

Loni hopes her latest glamour shots get her more bookings on cruise lines.

# posted by douchebag1
3:27 pm June, 22 The Know said...

Dont hold back the tears Loni. You’ll never win Mommy’s approval.

3:29 pm June, 22 The Know said...

Loni in 5 years…

http://www.catalogs.com/info/bestof/wp-content/uploads/2009/02/donatella.jpg

3:30 pm June, 22 burris said...

with this sack and sharkbag, it’s going to be a good monthly

3:43 pm June, 22 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

aHA! It’s just as I suspected. Beaker, behind my back, spliced the DNA of Yoko Ono with that of Patton Oswalt and the result is Four Prongs. I thought he was working on the Cottage Cheese Air Conditioner project (I can’t say anything more about it with my Army funding and all, but it’s gonna be HUGE!). Time to go stuff Beaker in the punishment closet, brb.

3:45 pm June, 22 Bagnonymous said...

Loni ought to be a shoe-in for the Cruise Lines job, as she already brings extra floatation devices to the bargaining table.

.

Too easy…

3:50 pm June, 22 Et Tu Douche? said...

I think Four Prong is harmless all the pictures he’s in these girls seem to be happy to pose with him. Maybe he’s a promoter/agent/talent scout of some sort.

3:51 pm June, 22 Merle Baggard said...

she has the crazy eyes. beware

3:56 pm June, 22 anonymous said...

I’m still not sure what gender FP is. Neither is s/he.

4:04 pm June, 22 Four Prong said...

I am the best street flyer distributor on the strip. Me girls suck you long time Joe.

4:04 pm June, 22 Mock Turtle said...

You pay tribute, of course, to Loni Anderson, a fine comedienne.

Rightfully, as beside the slight resemblance, this Loni clearly has a terrific sense of humour, with the not strangling four-prong and all.

4:06 pm June, 22 Vin Douchal said...

You kidding me? Hall of Scote? The same hallowed ground that houses Fish Slap, Bra!, and The Joey Porsche Experience?

.

POSEUR! He should be called, “He Just Plays With His Bangs And Drinks Non-Alcoholic Drinks As He Snaps Photos With Unwitting Participants” or “HJPWHBAD N-A DAHSPWUP” for short (I think).

.

Like a red-assed baseball writer putting his foot down about Pete Rose, I refuse to cast an “Aye” vote for this guy/gal/it int any “Hall”.

4:08 pm June, 22 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Guidosan the killer fork.

4:10 pm June, 22 mr.reeve said...

This shim should have its own Hall……”It’s Pat” Bag Hall of Scrote. And yes, I believe Vin is correct. That is an iced tea Pat the Four Prong is sipping on.

4:10 pm June, 22 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

@ Four Prong

.

My mom only let’s me spend $5. $% for sucky-sucky?

4:11 pm June, 22 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

^ @ myself

.

Hey spooge-snorter, that’s $5 right?

4:11 pm June, 22 Vin Douchal said...

Err, “Scrote” … Hall of Scrote

5:11 pm June, 22 Vin Douchal said...

I will admit that another couple of photos with Loni here would make this pussycockk palatable.

.

Or at least as welcome as a Celebrity Ass Pear shot of Anna Kournikova . Where has she been ?

5:37 pm June, 22 soy bomb said...

Wow. Just wow. DB1 with the Hall of Scrote call. Barring any blacked-out-drunken-posts-by-me, I believe that this is the first time I’ve been compelled to comment on Four Prong, that’s how little I regard s/him. Does s/he bring a unique flavor to the choad spectrum? Indeed. But in no way do I endorse a Hall of Scrote induction for this middle-of-the-road douche.

5:54 pm June, 22 Deltus said...

The current HOS members would cut off FP’s prongs, and make him (her? it?) eat them. That is, before rape-fucking him with a purple jelly dong and telling him how gay he is for getting rape-fucked with a purple jelly dong.

6:09 pm June, 22 Kevin said...

That part of me thats Asian wants to give this oxygen thief a high five for getting his photo taken with a well toned much taller blonde hottie. The rest of me that is a sane rational college educated person wants to punch him in the face for that hair, what on earth is he thinking?

That girl though, major hotness..

7:23 pm June, 22 DarkSock said...

Sometimes you just gotta say fork it; right or prong it’s sign a sign of the tines.

.

He is the Devil’s hair pick.

8:20 pm June, 22 Steve L. said...

if anybody has more potent date rape drugs to spike drinks with than Four Prong, i don’t want to know about it.

9:04 pm June, 22 Baron Von Goolo said...

………….”fistmule.”

.

BA-HA-HA-HA-HAHA-HEEEEEEEEE-HAAAAAAAA!!!!

10:49 pm June, 22 The Dude said...

J’aime Loni <– that's French, bitches!!

Oh shit, I'm feeling the Grieco virus! aaaaaaaaaahhhhh!

Just for throwing a little French piffle? dang!

11:17 pm June, 22 Whoop-di-douche said...

He might be right up there with XENU, but only time will tell. Definitely needs a new hairstylist.

Or a job raking leaves come fall.

11:18 pm June, 22 Whoop-di-douche said...

Anybody growing swizzle sticks on his forehead deserves cocktail in the mouth.

11:19 pm June, 22 Crucial Head said...

Sheldon Pot Jr. was righteously dumfounded when his annunciation as the sole proprietor of his grandfather Pol’s legacy rang out over the loudspeaker.

11:21 pm June, 22 Whoop-di-douche said...

Polka dot bikinis are full of mini-targets for four-Prong’s head’s up talents.

And ripe melons for the little melon balls he plans to spear with those pronglets.

11:25 pm June, 22 Whoop-di-douche said...

Va va voom blonde and four-prong ding-dong are giving me dotty eyeballs.

11:28 pm June, 22 Whoop-di-douche said...

I wonder if his head lice ever entertain themselves playing percussion with his prongs.

11:32 pm June, 22 Whoop-di-douche said...

I am trying to imagine what the locals would do if he de-planed in, say, Saudi Arabia, or Iran.

11:33 pm June, 22 Whoop-di-douche said...

He must have been born in a sewer somewhere to have such a storm grate planted on his skull.

11:46 pm June, 22 Whoop-di-douche said...

Imagine if you will, that you are some female somewhere on a date with this choad and you just had some animal IN “N OUT burgers, and then next thing ya’ know, this pooper is atop you giving you the beef and you are staring up at his face and the crown on his temples is gently bobbing as he knobs you in the tainter, and you are suddenly aburst with uncontrolled laughter and pee all over the intruder before he can pop his tweeter, and his knees are soaked with piss, as is your butt, and this is what a pisser with four stiff deely-bobbers deserves.

12:01 am June, 23 Dicy said...

Hmm I give up on trying to predict what kind of girl y’all think is a Hott! Sure she seems crazy and has a lot of make up on but I think she’s pretty! Maybe I’ve been desensitized by today’s media into thinking plastic is pretty tho… must ponder this some more. In the meantime back to the telescope!

12:49 am June, 23 P Showard Chunt said...

laugh it up fuzzballs, when the pic comes out of four-prong piercing both sacs of silicone in a motorboating accident, you won’t be laughing at him for the hall of scrote, anymore.

5:15 am June, 23 DarkSock said...

Boss, if (when) the powerful east coast Fork Cartel hits you with a cease and desist, you could always fall back in these monikers for this tool:

• Rooster CockkBürn

• The PitchFuck

• Cockatoo Ennis Mouth

• Party Tine

• Tine Daily

• Guy Brush (for you Monkey Island fans…both of you)

9:25 am June, 23 Anonymous said...

He looks like a fat antelope.

She looks a bit too plasticky, but I finding myself staring and wanting more.

10:04 am June, 24 Douchelips said...

Four Prong is epic. He deserves a place somewhere. Hell…that’s it, in hell.

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