Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Reader Mail: Snowtagging

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Greetings DB1,

Just got sent a link to your site, and I’m duly impressed! Wow, I had no idea I could mock some douchemonkeys like this!

I notice that there seems to be a lack of the annoying creatures who are the douchebags of snowsports, though. On that note, I offer my services as your High Altitude Correspondent.

From base camp at 9650′ in Breckenridge, CO, I have unique access to bro-bra Mountain Douches in a town well known for their presence. Additionally, as a traveling snowskate competitor/coach, I witness high altitude douchedyness in a plethora of snowbound locals! If only I had known Saturday, as the evening afforded me the opportunity to grab an amazing on-snow douche/hott shot…

I’ll be looking forward to hearing from you about my High Altitude Correspondent idea, if it’s of any interest. Just think, a whole new genre to mock! Either way, I’ll be signing onto HCwDB….

Regards!

– Snowtagger

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As a fan of the 1991 classic, Ski School, I look forward to your submissions, Snowtagger. We need some more winter climate ‘bags and hotties on the site.

# posted by douchebag1
11:43 am June, 8 bigphatnotadouche said...

Nice orange Hotts in CO or were my eyes overcome by snow blindness as I stared at the Hotts legs?

Welcome to the mock Snowtagger.

11:45 am June, 8 mr.reeve said...

Oh yes Ski School. Wasn’t it a snow version or part 2 of Summer School? I always thought so.

Those snow whores are pretty damn tan! Any dick with a hair band is douche chode.

11:47 am June, 8 scrotum pole said...

I tagged a bunch of snow in the eighties, lost my girlfriend, my car and most of my nasal passages.

11:50 am June, 8 Crucial Head said...

I peed in the snow once.

11:52 am June, 8 Sorta Damocles said...

Welcome Snowtagger! Breck is a…”target rich environment”…happy hunting.

.

I miss the spring ritual up the road at A-Basin…watching the tanned snow hotts in binkinis with scrapes up the legs from wiping out.

12:01 pm June, 8 Wheezer said...

I like snow bunnies.

.

Bro bunnies should eat the yellow snow.

12:02 pm June, 8 Army of Bullshit said...

I ate yellow snow once. Once!

12:17 pm June, 8 Bagnonymous said...

L-R: Hell yes, 9-iron to the face, sure why not (as long as she “says” she’s 18), and sweet Jeebus yes–and keep the boots on, too!

.

PS. The sum total of boob in this photo is maybe a C-cup at best, but with all that hott legg I’m not bothered by it one bit.

12:21 pm June, 8 Bagnonymous said...

Hott. Has. Her. Hand. On. The. Other. Hott’s. Ass.

.

* fwap *

.

…and I’m spent.

12:22 pm June, 8 The Observation Specialist's Second Cousin Four Times Removed said...

There are three ladies and four A cups in this picture.

12:22 pm June, 8 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Darsh!

12:41 pm June, 8 Baleen said...

Later, the Hotts and I will snuggle by the fire reading our favorite passages by Marquis de Sade and drinking Remy XO. He will be partially mauled by a grizzley and we will throw his bloodied remains into the roaring flame only to hear his flesh crackle in the embers. After the cock rings and jelly dongs, we will all snooze comfortably in a pile of flesh with the scent of charred mountain douche lingereing the the afterglow.

12:47 pm June, 8 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

He is an old-school George Michael/Wham douche. Maybe gay? They are underage in many states. And by underage I mean me likey.

12:48 pm June, 8 Mr. White said...

I’m a little concerned about the leprous lesion on Gray Dress’s foot. I’ll need to inspect the rest of her to make sure she’s clean. And spanking Magenta Dress while I’m doing that will help me concentrate.

1:00 pm June, 8 Hotspur said...

Never saw Ski School but did see Hot Dog the movie looks pretty much the same

1:10 pm June, 8 massengill said...

@ Hotspur

Ski School has Booger from the Revenge of the Nerds series. Not the same movie. Not by a long shot.

1:15 pm June, 8 Vin Douchal said...

Gotta say one thing about this dude, he has a type he likes and sticks to it: underage, under-developed , cute face and most likely a father with a shotgun and a mean streak.

1:23 pm June, 8 Douchble Helix said...

The ‘bad guy’ and the guy with the eyebrows are in both Ski School and Summer School.

The bad guy also was in Blazing saddles, although uncredited.

Of course, Summer School is where I was first introduced to a certain Courtney Thorne-Smith.

1:25 pm June, 8 Deltus said...

*clenches eyes shut*

Don’t want the jailbait, Deltus. Don’t want the jailbait.

*peeks*

DON’T WANT THE JAILBAIT…

*cries*

1:28 pm June, 8 I R A Darth Aggie said...

Those poor hotts. The need to be de-douched. IYKWIMAITTYD.

1:40 pm June, 8 Et Tu Douche? said...

Welcome Snowtagger,

Having spent time in Jackson Hole I can totally relate to the Bro-Bra douchosity. They hate tourists, and if you’re not wearing the latest, coolest ski clothing or have the latest greatest gear they mock you. Most of them are trust fund prep school choad from the east coast. I’m so glad you mentioned this as they are a subspecies of DB’s worthy of mocking. Micah Black for one comes to mind as I had the misfortune to cross his path one afternoon and the look of scorn he heaped on me was BS.

2:35 pm June, 8 WeisenheimerBrainstorm said...

Mountain Douche. Sounds like a whole new category for the Hall of Scrote.

2:55 pm June, 8 doucheywallnuts said...

Is there any snow on the slopes with those hotts around?

2:59 pm June, 8 MILLS said...

looks like justin the snowboarding douchebunny kid gets a lot for his works worth attending the ski lifts in Aspen, and just look at those boots! oh pinky hottie oh wow id love to ski down her slopes shes like a voluptuous snow fox i would hunt down to capture and have as a trophy. talkin of footwear looks like snowdocuhe even managed to steal a pair of bowling shoes from his local bowling alley and spray painted them to douche effect for his liking.

4:01 pm June, 8 DarkSock said...

Those women have legs.

.

All the way up to their goony-goo-goos.

4:47 pm June, 8 Victor von Douche said...

The fact that i am considerably better looking and more fit, as well as not nearly as douchey as this pud make me shake my fist in anger at the gods for denying me the same leggage. Maybe it’s because i’m an asshole?

5:15 pm June, 8 Social Douchetortion said...

Ironically, snowskating is a bastard stepchild of the father of all douchesports, snowboarding.

5:59 pm June, 8 Whoop-di-douche said...

I heard through the grapevine that Mr. White peed in the snow-white snow.

6:01 pm June, 8 Whoop-di-douche said...

Too much hot boobie gets in the way of ski-poles, but plenty of suckle thigh rewards remain for the roasting around the hot marshmallow fire.

Gimme s-mores.

6:02 pm June, 8 Whoop-di-douche said...

Twenty-three ski-douche!

10:08 pm June, 8 Stephanie said...

They’re all hoping to get into the high school play called “Orange”

10:21 pm June, 9 Steve L. said...

we’re counting on you to put those Kokanee commercials out of their misery, Snowtagger.

and then we can move on to Bud Camp and Coors Light.

9:00 am June, 10 THEONETRUEDOUCHE said...

A trifecta of Hot-and not a skanky whore among them-

Although middle hot allowing douche to rub his leg on her inner thigh while she gaze to see if he can get a bulge while going for th cheeky ass grab on hottie right displays a fine notion of naughty!!!!!!

Peeling the skin tight dresses of each upward revealing their taught bodies until their arms are above their heads with perky boobies exposed is but a bonus to the ensuing tangle of flesh.

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