Friday, July 16, 2010

Friday Haiku

Inscriptions on face,

Tell where the gold is buried,

Hint: “No fault divorce.”

Tattoos on his face

Signify his gangster ties

With MS-Turdy.

— Crucial Head

The plain white t-shirt

offsets Affliction body;

his ass is tapped out.

— Wheezer

Instinct takes over

As Duane humps Steff’s dress that looks

like mom’s couch cushion

— Mr. Scrotato Head

Jawa on on left cheek

Searches face for scrap metal…

Build droid to kill him.

— Boatbutter

Rorshach nuzzles up

Kimmy smiles uncomfortably

sees a bad pattern.

– Mr. Biggs

Sandy smells so good

Puddy Holly’s getting wood

Do better, she could

— saulgoode42

Prison G.E.D.

Teacher’s pet has a huge crush

Not a shot in hell

— Vin Douchal

Even this dude’s poop

Is bedazzled with

White Corn Hieroglyphs

— DarkSock

grandma’s wallpaper

disguises pointy funbags

anal bead necktie

— paperorplastic

# posted by douchebag1
7:09 am July, 16 Bagnonymous said...

Porn-quality hott

Gets sniffed by an ink-stained douche

Ruins my morning

7:10 am July, 16 Wheezer said...

BP capped their spill,

but isn’t at fault for this

leak of common sense.

7:10 am July, 16 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Leering at the hott

with tatts on the head will bring

bouncer to clean mess.

7:11 am July, 16 Crucial Head said...

Pfah closes his eyes

Regrets sleeping while his kid

Ran loose with Sharpie.

7:12 am July, 16 Crucial Head said...

This ‘Bag’s future job?

Features something that includes

Word: Sanitation.

7:12 am July, 16 Anthony LaBaglia said...

Two chemical peels

Black girl already had one;

Made her take a shit

7:14 am July, 16 Bagnonymous said...

Rosary necklace

Biggest beads I’ve ever seen

OH! …that’s why they’re brown!

7:14 am July, 16 Wheezer said...

I would laugh at this,

but when you pass out drunk, you

should hate the result.

7:14 am July, 16 Crucial Head said...

“Sent of a Woman?”

… Or, the scent of a: whoa-man!

Douche prefers latter.

7:15 am July, 16 Anthony LaBaglia said...

When delivering

Pizzas it doesn’t matter

How the fuck you look

7:16 am July, 16 Wheezer said...

The plain white t-shirt

offsets Affliction body;

his ass is tapped out.

7:16 am July, 16 Crucial Head said...

Tattoos on his face

Signify his gangster ties

With MS-Turdy.

7:18 am July, 16 Anthony LaBaglia said...

She is a tranny

Wearing my mom’s couch fabric

He eats dick fromage

7:19 am July, 16 Crucial Head said...

‘Nam Vet sniffs his prey

Smiles knowing SHE has balls

Adds to necklace.

7:21 am July, 16 boatbutter said...

Jawa on on left cheek

Searches face for scrap metal…

Build droid to kill him.

7:21 am July, 16 saulgoode42 said...

Check out tattooed geek

Mother Mary on his cheek

Hope the chick’s a freak

7:21 am July, 16 Bag Margera said...

Techno-organic

virus infection. That’s right.

X-men reference.

7:21 am July, 16 Wheezer said...

Programmer’s tatts show

the new font he developed:

bling wingdings. It sucks.

7:21 am July, 16 Anthony LaBaglia said...

His Swatch is so old

It was around when she was

Still packing a shlong

7:22 am July, 16 Crucial Head said...

Incense wafts from bleeth

Beckons ‘bag ever closer

Smells just like tucked scrote.

7:22 am July, 16 boatbutter said...

Beads are stained shit brown.

Only one explanation…

Ben-wa rosary.

7:23 am July, 16 saulgoode42 said...

Sandy smells so good

Puddy Holly’s getting wood

Do better, she could

7:23 am July, 16 Wheezer said...

‘Hunters are awake!

Haiku numbers strong today;

a sign of great things!

7:23 am July, 16 Colossus of Choads said...

Maori wannabe,

forgot to add final touch;

colour-in whole face.

7:25 am July, 16 Crucial Head said...

Douchebag longs for wiff

Of live female flesh after

Shaving with inkpen.

7:25 am July, 16 Bag Margera said...

Don’t look now honey.

There’s a camouflaged lizard

looking to tongue-strike.

7:25 am July, 16 Bagnonymous said...

Who says girls don’t fart?

Check the look on this guy’s face:

Lovin’ every sniff!

7:26 am July, 16 Anthony LaBaglia said...

Crucial: Rafterman

has escaped from Ho Chi Minh

To a new Village

7:26 am July, 16 Crucial Head said...

Facial tattoos are

Inspired by the border

Of Boss’s web page?

7:26 am July, 16 Wheezer said...

Face isn’t finished;

my suggestions all include

hot branding iron.

7:27 am July, 16 Colossus of Choads said...

Mo-nique tries to read

inscriptions on small man’s head,

cant understand “douche”.

7:28 am July, 16 Anthony LaBaglia said...

Instead of fraggin’

Charlie, his assignment changed-

He will be faggin’

7:28 am July, 16 Wheezer said...

Sorry, Colossus,

I didn’t see yours in time.

We’re thinking alike.

7:28 am July, 16 Crucial Head said...

This economy

Tough on Frank Gehry intern

Canvas for master.

7:29 am July, 16 Vin Douchal said...

Prison G.E.D.

Teacher’s pet has a huge crush

Not a shot in hell

7:29 am July, 16 Bag Margera said...

She has a flower

dress. He has skin weeds. This is

a ruined garden.

7:31 am July, 16 Wheezer said...

Hott’s perky boobies

have me “rosing” up my palm;

just hope she’s a she.

.

.

.

.

(Those “her schlong” comments

are making me paranoid.

Is that a bad thing?)

7:31 am July, 16 Amerigo Vesdouchey said...

Nubian princess.

I want to rock Chaka Khan.

By rock, I mean bang.

.

Greasy, V-neck douche.

Tatted ear? Seriously?

Future holds regret.

.

.

-Amerigo Vesdouchey

7:31 am July, 16 Vin Douchal said...

Obama’s new law

Sum of tatts cannot exceed

85 per cent

7:31 am July, 16 Crucial Head said...

‘Bag inhales the scent

Of fresh cut post-op sutures

Ben-Wa Balls ready.

7:32 am July, 16 DarkSock said...

This isn’t a man;

It’s Henry Rollin’s penis

Roaming free again.

7:33 am July, 16 Vin Douchal said...

Tatto artistry

Elective course in third grade?

He failed, “A” for effort

7:34 am July, 16 Crucial Head said...

Pfah’s IT team scrawled

Heiroglyphics his face

Warns against this site.

7:35 am July, 16 DarkSock said...

Hank’s hard-learned lesson:

Don’t mouth off to Medusa

Then nap while she tatts

7:35 am July, 16 saulgoode42 said...

Jill’s smellin’ of joy

Rudolph’s a felon, oh boy

Squeeze her melons, oy.

7:35 am July, 16 Crucial Head said...

Last Haiku:

.

Pfah’s IT team scrawled

Heiroglyphics ‘on’ his face

Warns against this site.

7:36 am July, 16 Bagnonymous said...

Pretty flowered dress

Nicely manicured nails

Sadly now worth sh*t

7:37 am July, 16 Vin Douchal said...

An inked up dog poop

Look reeks of high school drop out

Plans kidnap murder

7:37 am July, 16 Amerigo Vesdouchey said...

Boobies, hands, curves, thighs.

She’s definately all she.

Or I’ll need shower.

.

-Amerigo Vesdouchey

7:38 am July, 16 Bag Margera said...

Just because she dwarfs

this tiny tatted vagrant,

don’t make her a man.

7:39 am July, 16 Vin Douchal said...

“Well I guess if you

Have the three hundred dollars

Let’s go to your room”

7:39 am July, 16 Bagnonymous said...

Think that she’s a “he”?

Then you must not have a cockk.

Go ahead and fwap!

7:40 am July, 16 Vin Douchal said...

Crafty tattoo guy

“Washes off in a few days”

Money in the bank

7:41 am July, 16 Mr. Biggs said...

Rorshach nuzzles up

Kimmy smiles uncomfortably

sees a bad pattern.

7:42 am July, 16 Vin Douchal said...

A fetish couple

He likes tatts, she’s into scat

Match made in San Fran

7:43 am July, 16 DarkSock said...

Pfah’s absence explained;

He crashed his VW

Into a Tatt Shoppe

7:44 am July, 16 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

David Cross after

Arrested Development

“I just ‘tooed myself”

7:45 am July, 16 DarkSock said...

Jen smirks to herself,

Childhood issues now addressed:

“No, Daddy; fuck YOU”.

7:46 am July, 16 DarkSock said...

New name for tattoos

When they are on guys like this;

I call them “Shattoos”.

7:47 am July, 16 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

If you have to get

That close to tell if she’s hot

You need new glasses

7:47 am July, 16 DarkSock said...

He just flopped out wet,

A shivering stinky pile

From Jim Rose’s butt.

7:47 am July, 16 Bag Margera said...

Girl scout training taught

her to play dead while in the

presence of wild bears.

.

Unfortunate that

teachings won’t apply to foul

necrophiliacs.

7:47 am July, 16 Wheezer said...

Marilyn Chambers

had daughter? Ivory Scrote

totally pure poo.

7:47 am July, 16 ehcuodouche said...

Tatt face is stupid

But I want to be helpful

I think she’s a dude

7:48 am July, 16 DarkSock said...

Moby is half blind;

Look at his new tatts – and now,

Hits on Alba’s mom.

7:50 am July, 16 DarkSock said...

It’s Mr. Inky

Trying to park his Dinky

Inside her Stinky

7:50 am July, 16 Anthony LaBaglia said...

If you don’t think that’s

A dude, you may be surprised

By the reacharound

7:52 am July, 16 Anthony LaBaglia said...

Or even more shocked

When she runs her shriveled prick

Up your shit canal

7:53 am July, 16 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Steff proves tough to crack

Desparate mime tries sure thing

“Kicked in waffle pouch”

7:53 am July, 16 Anthony LaBaglia said...

You can imagine how bad I wanted my $20 back.

7:53 am July, 16 Bagnonymous said...

Mixed reviews abound:

Is it a man or a chick?

(On the left, that is.)

7:53 am July, 16 DarkSock said...

Looks like R. Crumb’s son

Continues the Legacy:

He’s Bat Shit Crazy.

7:55 am July, 16 DarkSock said...

Pfah just uttered

Worst pick-up line ever said:

“Girl, I’m DRAWN to you…”

7:55 am July, 16 DarkSock said...

^sorry…

7:56 am July, 16 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Instinct takes over

As Duane humps Steff’s dress that looks

like mom’s couch cushion

7:57 am July, 16 Dicy said...

Tattoos on face, the

First sign of a douche. Hott

Backs away in fear.

-Dicy

7:57 am July, 16 DarkSock said...

He is the first guy

To get the new Tatt Technique:

“Shake n’ Bake Tattoo”!

7:58 am July, 16 Wheezer said...

Architects’ off-day

results in more laughs; blueprint

for great afternoon.

7:58 am July, 16 paperorplastic said...

grandma’s wallpaper

disguises pointy funbags

anal bead necktie

7:59 am July, 16 DarkSock said...

Even this dude’s poop

Is bedazzled with

White Corn Hieroglyphs

8:00 am July, 16 Bag Margera said...

Sickening scrotewank’s

skunk skin seriously scarred

suffering Sally.

8:00 am July, 16 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Him: Jungle fever

A match made in East Lansing

Her: .45 cal.

8:00 am July, 16 DarkSock said...

Todd’s hard learned lesson:

Don’t puke in funny pages

Then use as bedsheet.

8:01 am July, 16 DarkSock said...

He’s wrapped in bad ink;

Her boobs are wrapped in

Polyester Hell

8:04 am July, 16 Bag Margera said...

Her being a dude

is the only way he will

get any action.

8:05 am July, 16 Wheezer said...

Big Stein, Sheppard die;

this chump lives. Not a Yanks fan,

but that just ain’t right.

8:15 am July, 16 Whoop-di-douche said...

A leopard can’t change

its spots, nor can a tatted

douche: Predator-bag.

8:18 am July, 16 Whoop-di-douche said...

Tropical hot-print

on Hott is delish; tatts on

scrote? Like coffee grounds.

8:20 am July, 16 Whoop-di-douche said...

Law of contrasts must

rule: Clear-skinned hot gets print dress;

tatted scrotes wear white.

8:23 am July, 16 Whoop-di-douche said...

Sho’ nuff, he prayed the

rosary and the Holy

Mother of Hott came.

8:54 am July, 16 End the Haberdouchery said...

Too drunk to notice

That the lady is a dude.

Her hands dwarf his cock.

11:01 am July, 16 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

This is just wrong.

11:07 am July, 16 P Showard Chunt said...

faux news style blonde

rarely evokes sympathy,

i feel bad for her.

12:08 pm July, 16 mr.reeve said...

I got nothing. These two fucktards deserve each other though.

Tatt face Larry

Perky fake blonde

Shit stains of the world

3:03 pm July, 16 douche bagel said...

emploment opportunities limited

like untatted areas on head

death by horse erection

3:48 pm July, 16 ehcuodouche said...

Tattoo face douchebags

Make me wistful for the days

Of Samurai Scrote

5:51 pm July, 16 creature said...

graffiti problem

has reached epidemic stage

space left for fist blow

2:45 pm July, 17 Steve L. said...

Cindy not sober

enough to know just what she’s

posing next to. bleurrrrgh.

11:14 pm July, 17 Abdouchah the Butcher said...

lady does not know

douchebag is sniffing her hair

she will lay smackdown

11:34 pm July, 17 lucious lupus john digs the anal bead necklace--always be prepared said...

this is what happens

when you get drunk and pass out

in your friends tat shop

11:40 pm July, 17 lucious lupus john digs the anal bead necklace--always be prepared said...

@wheezer 7:14am

that link is a g-dam thing of beauty!

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