Thursday, July 8, 2010

Magritte N'est Pas Une Douchebag.

I title this, my latest master work of outsider art, “Magritte N’est Pas Une Douchebag,” to both honor as well as critique the great modernist painter.

While there are no hot chicks to counterbalance this pic in proper HCwDB formulation, the use of spatial isolation functions as a critique of the douche body absent the normative gender roles.

The framing via reflection and the privileging of the apparatus at the moment of capture all suggest an inability to reclaim the artifact in the age of sociological fracture and identity destabilization. While the prominent role of hand sanitizer offers a playful critique of the ultimate greasy and unclean douche plague in all of its manifestations.

This latest work will, of course, be a part of my gallery showing at the Guggenheim Museum in 2023 when my genius for reappropriating images in the age when virtual has superceded actual is finally recognized by the academy.

But, since there are no Hot Chicks in this work of art, have some Snap Pear.

# posted by douchebag1
1:57 pm July, 8 mr.reeve said...

“Euro gay bags snapping pictures alone in the men’s shitter”. It’s the newest gay porn DVD sensation……….so I am told of course.

2:03 pm July, 8 mr.reeve said...

Speaking of snap…….I would like to snap Snap Pear’s thong with my teeth………

2:14 pm July, 8 Whoop-di-douche said...

Whyo snapped these photos?

2:16 pm July, 8 chaserofthehott said...

What the hell boss I was taking a drink when the page opened. I threw up all in my cup…

.

.

.

.

Thanks for snap pear 🙂

2:18 pm July, 8 chaserofthehott said...

There looks to be some lesbian porn starting to go down in the snap pear photo… I like that!

2:19 pm July, 8 chaserofthehott said...

Is the hand on the left holding anal beads? Still talking about Snap Pear of course, not revisiting the other, EVER!

2:22 pm July, 8 G said...

Looks like the foreplay before some douche on douche action…this typed of course, after I gagged and resuscitated myself with snap pear…

2:34 pm July, 8 Gregan said...

Why is the guy taking the photo, taking the photo of the other guy in the mirror… when he could simply be facing the guy straight on?

Is there some kind of medusa like quality of certain uberdouches that we’re not yet aware of? Where you can’t look at them directly or you’ll turn to stone, or worse yet you become an uberdouche yourself?

2:42 pm July, 8 Douches Wild said...

while there are is a critique of the endless self referentiality of mechanical reproduction, this visual document also recapitulates the more venerable strategies of Vermeer and Velasquez revealing their presence in their paintings via a mirror depicted within the painting, all of which reifies the pervasive verity in an even older canard: “No matter how much you wiggle and dance/ the last two drops always land in your pants”.

2:49 pm July, 8 Mock Turtle said...

Look, it’s HCwDB, not DBwHC.

Next time, put the HC on the main page, and the DB in the link you have to click on.

Also, you now should in fairness pay my dry-cleaning bill. You know how hard it is to get used HoHos out of jeans?

2:55 pm July, 8 End the Haberdouchery said...

If you zoom into that photo until it fills your screen it’s like your monitor has become a portal into an infinite abyss of douche and douche after-products.

2:58 pm July, 8 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Boss, you broke the fuccen universe. As you can see, this image has kept replicating itself ad infinitum. Just look in the mirror/new wormhole. First Snooki, now this. What’s next? Do you anally rape my mother while pouring sugar in my gas tank?

3:06 pm July, 8 soy bomb said...

This is not a nottadouche

3:26 pm July, 8 I douche, therefore I am said...

I am in total awe of the DB1’s powers of critical reflection…

Flex Douchor looks a lot like Pumpito’s younger brother, I’m sure that he would be performing ridiculous dance moves if this were a video.

3:35 pm July, 8 Horace Dangleballs said...

“SNAP” Pear, indeed…

3:37 pm July, 8 DarkSock said...

The guy in the tee shirt trips them and hold’s them down when they first walk in, until Gunther can get an erection worked up.

3:40 pm July, 8 Rideau de Douche said...

Well… in French you would say “UN douchebag”… Not “UNE”.

Except if you wanted to highlight the strange way of life of those two “people” ? (Don’t really know if we can call them people…).

…And by strange I mean gay.

3:54 pm July, 8 Douchie Howser M.D. said...

Flex McDoucherson has obviously never heard the athletes’ adage “Legs are for Go; Arms are for Show.” His calves are the size of his forearms.

.

Then again, his twig-like legs make his upper body look relatively larger and, thus, he pulls more Bleeth (or, other Douches, not that there’s anything wrong with that).

.

If his secret gets out, expect a surge in lower-limb “muscosuction” among scrotes.

6:31 pm July, 8 MC 900 Foot Douchebag said...

Damn, Douchie Howser M.D. might actually be me in the parallel universe you get to by looking at this picture.

.

No shit, I was going to point out that your arms should NEVER be thicker than your legs. Well, if you’re a paraplegic I guess that would be OK.

6:36 pm July, 8 Nate said...

DB1, your seamless compilation of art criticism jargon rescues you from the rightfully-railed-against maneuver of unsoftened douche display. May your satire stay sharp.

6:51 pm July, 8 lucious lupus john thinks a brillo box is art said...

couldn’t you have at least tried to photoshop some pear? i find this picture highly disturbing, but that is its intrigue. hang it in the lamoca and noone would be the wiser. it almost has a scratch and sniff quality.

6:55 pm July, 8 lucious lupus john thinks a brillo box is art said...

seriously, i bet you could hang this in a gallery and get a good crowd admiring it on wine and cheese wednesday.

8:48 pm July, 8 sprechen Sie Douches said...

What a brilliant expression of HCwDB dogma. I am intrigued by the lesser DB taking the picture, perhaps signifying the essential “bro” relationship and its role in the descent to full ‘Baghood while also pointing to homoerotic undertones which pervade the ‘Baghood.

However even more intriguing is the mirror-within-a-mirror concept. An infinite stretch of ‘Bags… Identity destabilization, yes, but to me it is also a bleak representation of our culture’s limitless propensity for mass production and image imitation.

But oh DB1, if there were no HC1 I would present you with a For Resale box of Twinkies from Costco and then quietly leave the room until you’d had your fill.

9:09 pm July, 8 Sir David Douchenborough said...

After looking at this picture, I have visions of chicken legs and now want to go to KFC.

9:31 pm July, 8 ai said...

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ポリフェノール

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IKEA イケア

有酸素運動

カンヌ国際映画祭

ジューン・ブライド

ギネス・ブック

肩甲骨ダイエット

クール・ビズ

Wi-Fi

アメーバピグ

no!no!HAIR(ノーノーヘア)

ギャルソンカフェ

ガーリー

希望留年制度

無添加

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ターンオーバー

コピー・ワンス

ネット銀行

ランチメイト症候群

ココット

インターネットスラング

JavaScrip

Flash

できることから始める

日々こどもと一緒に成長

映画、テレビ、読書など趣味の世界

キレイで健康に痩せるには

アラフォーのデトックス 日々の毒だし

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ビューティバスト キレイ美しい

プエラリアDX 胸大きく

プエラリアDXの効果

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胸を大きくする方法

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9:35 pm July, 8 Troy Tempest said...

no!no!HAIR! indeed.

6:42 am July, 9 Mariah said...

DB1, your seamless compilation of art criticism jargon rescues you from the rightfully-railed-against maneuver of unsoftened douche display. May your satire stay sharp.

8:23 am July, 9 Wheezer said...

I love Snap Pear! I’m surprised there is no “dark” humor here from “elastic snap hole of the love pear”—–errrrr, “bear”…..(ahem)

8:42 am July, 10 Steve L. said...

self portrait in a Vegas casino washroom be swank. er i mean STANK.

on the bright side, thank god for Snap Pear.

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