Thursday, July 1, 2010

Ricardo’s Shirt Unbuttons to “11”

For when you need that extra “Oomph” when hittin’ on the Calgary Canada doe-eyed hotties. Sometimes you just gotta take the unbuttoning to “11.”

Ricardo’s not there yet. But you’ll know it when he is.

Scarlett’s sultry stare, mixture of annoyance and sexiness that it is, causes my gonads to enflame and inspires a desire to compose an orchestral score and build a skyscraper in the hopes she’ll disdainfully ignore me at the subsequent cocktail party fête thrown at Lincoln Center in my honor.

Scarlett should be given an award for a gaze like that. It is the personification of the distinction between the sexes that renders gender roles essentialized.

# posted by douchebag1
12:20 pm July, 1 bigphatnotadouche said...

David Navarro looks like he has put on the lbs.
Love the sultry look of red headed Hott.
I’m going to retire to mensroom room for 45 seconds of bliss and fwapping.

12:20 pm July, 1 The 'Bag Piper fae Edinburgh said...

First comment after creating my profile. Howdy all.

Robert Downey Jr Jr has certainly got it going on with the chest tatt and silver pumps.

Scarlett looks like a slutty Pharma Girl (copyright Barney Stinson) ripe for the plucking. Dear god yes.

And Blondie looks like butter wouldn’t melt. But my balls would.

12:26 pm July, 1 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Dave Grohl’s career after Nirvana just keeps going further and further downhill, doesn’t it?

12:59 pm July, 1 Amerigo Vesdouchey said...

Didn’t I see Ricardo get tea-bagged in Pecker?

1:00 pm July, 1 dbBen said...

“Some get a kick from cocaa-aaa-aaiiine”
.
I don’t think that Pam realizes that Pam and Ricardo did a couple of lines while she answered a call from Brian.

1:03 pm July, 1 dbBen said...

*Scarlett and Ricardo

1:09 pm July, 1 Peter Ilyich Doucheovsky said...

Scarlett is indeed staring into my soul. However, her friend looks like she was cryogenically frozen in 1995 and thawed out ins 2010. I didn’t realize they still made white jeans.
Ricardo’s newest song:
“This one? It’s called, ‘Lick my Love Pump.”

1:43 pm July, 1 Vin Douchal said...

Ricardo mows lawns
I’d like to graze blondie’s back forty

While Scarlett makes that face at us and says disparaging remarks about my technique

1:57 pm July, 1 massengill said...

Blond one left says, “Go Bears!”

5:51 pm July, 1 Mr. Biggs said...

And Ricardo’s vacant gaze reminds us that hell is real and Satan is out to get us.

5:52 pm July, 1 Mr. Biggs said...

I would run this picture through a database of club decors just so I could stalk a place where Scarlett could possibly show up.

7:58 pm July, 1 Steve L. said...

i shall have to carpet search Calgary for doe-eyed hotts.
and by “carpet search” i mean just the Calgary Stampede, where the bars are (supposedly) full of down-to-earth women who have a tendency to lavish their doe-eyed hotness on Ricardo.

… now allow me down multiple shots of Plymouth Gin on an empty stomach. because all the earthy flavor from the juniper berries and roots botanicals serves to remind me of “down-to-earth” women. and all that.

9:25 pm July, 1 massengill said...

I shit you not: this guy looks so much like one of my co-workers, that when I showed the pic to my boss, he printed it out and taped it up in his cube.

9:25 pm July, 1 massengill said...

“His” being my co-worker’s cube.

9:46 pm July, 1 Douche Bauer said...

Are Rapunzel’s eyes migrating to the sides of her head? Maybe the tectonic plates in the center of her forehead are shifting. As for Scarlett, I am thinking of something other than a purse for you to hold in hands, darling. Two words for Ricardo- Manos arriba!

9:46 pm July, 1 Douche Bauer said...

Your hands that is.

9:49 pm July, 1 Mr. Biggs said...

… Is Scarlett wearing a leotard top over her jeans? That is like an acetylene torch on my soul. Db1, if you can testify she’s indeed in Calgary, that’s narrowed down enough for me. Let the stalking commence!

9:51 pm July, 1 Mr. Biggs said...

Yet another hall of hott / hott next door nominee. Who am I kidding. No woman that hot ever lived close to me. And another contender for hotchicksminusdouchebags.com.

10:17 pm July, 1 creature said...

all that, boss, & exposed midriff bellybutton drool!

10:22 pm July, 1 creature said...

btw, Ricardo cuts grass, rakes leaves & is going deaf from leaf blowing…. AQUI, AQUI…. HERE MUTHA FUCKAH!

9:30 am July, 2 Skyy Savage said...

” It is the personification of the distinction between the sexes that renders gender roles essentialized.”

Genius…

9:44 am July, 2 tall guy said...

Ricardo reminds me of a black denim-wearing hipster douche. Although i can reconcile the silver boots with the usual pair of Dunlop Volleys, Converse of other footwear that is the preferred choice of such losers. Douche all the way. Scarlett’s a hot.

6:27 am July, 5 Tony Ventresca said...

Calgary. If it wasn’t the oil capital of North America (okay, it will be soon enough) then it would be nothing more than a one-horse-town on the prairies. And that’s not Eastern Canadian jealousy speaking.

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